Thursday, December 25, 2014

offer me that deathless death

Merry Christmas! My family had a lovely day, thanks for asking! I awoke at 7:20am (a feat I hope never to repeat in the remainder of 2014), and we spent a desultory couple of hours opening presents. I don't know how much our Christmas morning routine differs from other families' routines, but I would gather that it's unusual - no one can open presents (or even dig through stockings) while anyone else is opening anything, and gifts from my mother are numbered and given in a strict and well-considered order. For instance, she made sure that when my brother and I opened our seventh package each, his was an angle grinder and mine was a coffee grinder (a burr grinder because I'm a fancy bitch now and can't just use my regular blade grinder, since I'm not a fucking peasant). Also, we immediately clean up everything as soon as we're done, since paper on the floor is strictly verboten.

But that makes for a long, leisurely Christmas morning with a lot of laughter and entertainment, particularly since we all like to get each other ridiculous things. [censored] put a lot of thought into my gifts, which means I got something to make fire, an unmentionable gag gift (okay, I'll mention it - it's a DIY kit to freeze my own eggs, which is obvi a joke), some dog tags that are funny enough that I'll probably wear them occasionally, as well as an Aeropress coffee maker that will work equally well in my apartment or during the apocalypse. I also got some lovely things from my parents, which I shall not bore you with the details of.

Post-Christmas, we ate breakfast, and then I napped in the living room for an hour and a half to make up for my aborted sleep. Eventually, I showered, and then my sister and her brood arrived to continue the celebration. I spent a couple of hours hanging out with my grandniece, who is five and quite adorable (albeit sticky enough that I told [censored] that he could return the egg kit). We all opened packages before supper, and then Sammi and Jaicee (the grandniece) had to leave. But Jackie, Shawn, Zane, Allie, and Zane's girlfriend stuck around, and we ended up playing Cards Against Humanity, which is always wonderful and terrible.

And then I washed dishes while my mother dried and my father and [censored] provided (weak) moral support. And now it's time to go to bed - Christmas isn't over yet, but I hope to recover in some sort of introverted haze tomorrow before engaging in more Christmas with my dad's siblings on Saturday. Goodnight!

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