Friday, October 01, 2010

settle for a world neither up or down

I'm in such a rioting conflict of emotions over my upcoming transition -- it's no wonder I came home feeling exhausted and fell asleep on the couch, thus scotching any possibility of getting some writing done. The primary emotion, of course, is excitement; I'm really beyond eager to get down to the business of writing, to see how far I can push this book and the other five books I want to write, and two weeks from tomorrow it's going to be what I can focus all my energies on. But, I'm also feeling very nostalgic for what I will miss about my job. It's not just the free food (although that's definitely part of it) or the ridiculous perks or the travel I've gotten to do. It's almost entirely the people, and the fact that I felt like I was part of something even if I didn't always want to be there.

Today was one of those days when I was too busy to do much thinking, which have always been my happiest at work (it's hard to be unhappy if you don't have time to think about how you feel). It was the last day of the quarter, which meant there were communications I had to put together, and I spent an inordinate amount of time editing a video for the big boss. The editing wasn't difficult, but uploading, downloading, and converting video just takes time, and then tweaking and adjusting start/end times for clips is a deceptively time-consuming process. Then, at 5:30, the big boss watched it and we decided to scrap it and try taping it again (which didn't upset me, since I thought it was the right call; we're usually able to do these in one take, but she was a little off yesterday and was much more on today), so then I had to do the download/upload/convert/tweak process all over again. That means that I missed my writing group (the one that formed after the class I took last winter, not my romance writer friends); she told me to go to the writing group and do it later or tomorrow, but I have a doctor's appointment tomorrow and couldn't upload video to the corp site from home, so I ignored her.

Anyway, I'll be glad when the next two weeks are over. It's going to be easier to stop thinking about work when I'm officially terminated and no longer responsible for anything on my to-do list -- which means I'll be able to write arm-length to-do lists that pertain to my own goals, not someone else's. Yay. Now, I should probably try to sleep -- goodnight!

Daily word count: 0 (0% of goal)
Productive time: -
RescueTime productivity rating: - (global average: 0.84)

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