sun goes down

According to some measurements provided by Blogger, this is my 4000th post. *throws confetti* That's...almost dumb. However, thank you for joining me whenever you feel like escaping the minutiae of your day by reading the minutiae of mine! It's been a good twelve years, and while I can't guess whether Blogger will still be around for the next twelve, I hope you'll stick around for as long as it does.

Of course, today didn't give me a lot of exciting things to share on my 4000th post, but that's how things go. I woke up this morning and dealt with the residual mess in my kitchen - I emptied the dishwasher from last night and added the last things that could go in there, and I put some stuff away, and all in all the cleanup was pretty easy. Last night was fun, of course, although I was too tired to do it justice in the post - I had a lowkey group of people over (John, Jess, Ian, Vidya, Katrina, Lauren, and Priyanka, in order of arrival), and we all managed to fit around my table (mostly because Priyanka was quite late after getting off work at the hospital, and John and Jess were taking turns hiding in my closet and trying to soothe Ian, who apparently wasn't that excited about a Wampface-style birthday party). But we drank some Dom Perignon, and we ate some tasty food, and Lauren asked the usual questions about reflecting on my past year and saying what I want for this year, and it was all generally wonderful.

Today, though, it was time to get back to work. After I cleaned up, I went to Samovar to have brunch with a writer friend - his name is Curtis, and he used to work at the same place I worked years ago, and now he and his wife live in Portland and he writes scifi. He was in town for an event (which I missed Saturday because of my delayed dinner + my inability to rally), but we grabbed lunch and talked writing shop, which was delightful. It also made me consider, again, how much sense it would make to move someplace with better rents and vibrant artistic communities....

Then I stopped at Target to buy bleach, and then I came home and took a nap. My nap was hardcore, and I startled myself awake an hour later - apparently this is what it's like to be old. Then I needed to do some work, but I was having trouble motivating, and so I talked to [censored] for quite awhile - he'd texted me for my birthday, of course, but we hadn't talked in awhile, so we had a long, meandering catch-up.

After that, though, work was really calling, so I spent the last eight hours curled up on the couch (with a glass of wine (two glasses) and a break for pot de creme) and did a whole bunch of monkey work. This included some web stuff, reformatting a couple of epubs, messing around with a cover, etc., etc. In fact, I went back to working on stuff after I made that list...but as I was starting to feel sleepy while playing around with photoshop, I felt an earthquake jolt that woke me right up (and reminded me that restocking my food and first aid supplies is on my to-do list).

But despite that jolt, I think it's time for bed - goodnight!

i love cheap thrills

I'm still in recovery mode from this weekend's adventures, so today was kind of rough. I spent the morning trying to get my life back into some semblance of order - answering a few emails (not enough), ordering groceries, doing laundry, making appointments, etc., etc. My house is nowhere close to tidy and I have a ton of stuff to do if I'm going to host an olympics party anytime soon, but at least I got some basics taken care of.

But then, after messing around online and eating some eggs and generally trying to motivate myself, I scurried down to San Bruno and met Barbara for a writing date. We talked for longer than we should have (mostly about ads, but also about life), but I eventually settled in to write, and I officially produced the first page of Lucy's story. No idea if it's going to stick or if I'll keep going with that storyline, but it's a start. And it's odd to start a book, I must say - opening up a new file and conjuring a story completely from scratch is a strange thing to do with one's life.

When I finished with that, I parted ways with Barbara, drove home, took care of a couple of things, and then made the v. unusual move of knocking on my neighbor's door. I had run into the guy in that couple in the elevator, and something compelled me to ask what he does for a living, at which point he mentioned that he's looking for a job. So I told him that I have some contacts (lol), and he said I should stop by for a glass of wine when I got home. And I actually followed through, and we had a nice chat.

It turns out that his wife was on her way to a historical fiction book club (which, in retrospect, would have been way more fun for me than talking about the tech scene), but we all talked for twenty minutes or so - and then he and I finished the bottle of wine that he'd opened while discussing the neighborhood, the shitty aspects of our building and the management company (while I merely had some tiny leaks, they have an actual hole in a closet, which sounds way worse), favorite restaurants, methods of coffee brewing (I think I sold him on an aeropress), etc., etc. So it was a rather interesting and impromptu evening, and we'll have to do it again in a week or two because we ended up not talking about tech at all.

But by the time I left their place (and walked two feet to my place - next time I'm not going to wear shoes; and also, we could just break into each other's places anytime anyway, since we share a terrace and both leave our windows open), I was *starving*, and so spending an hour making the soup I was going to make tonight wasn't in the cards. So I ordered some subpar curry from Sprig (the first thing that has ever disappointed me from them, but maybe I was too hungry to appreciate it), messed around online, and generally did very little - I'm tired, and my stomach still hurts, and I think relaxation and sleep tonight are important so that I can try to get a lot done tomorrow.

And on that note, it's time for bed - goodnight!

baby don't save me if your love isn't strong

I need to get up in a little over seven hours, so I should probably go to bed. Today was a fairly hermity day, all in the service of packing for San Diego + getting some downtime/introversion before embarking on my next adventure. So I spent the morning drinking coffee and playing with my plans for the week, as well as trying on dresses and doing laundry and figuring out what to take with me.

Then, of course, I had to do something to pamper myself, so I got a manicure and a pedicure to repair my ravaged nails so I'll fit in with the women at the conference. Then I went to the post office to mail a book to a reader, which was a faster errand than I anticipated. I grabbed coffee on the way home, and then spent more time than I intended messing around on my laptop - clearly I wasn't really in the mood to pack.

But I got all packed up, and I ate some supper, and I took out the trash and folded the rest of my laundry and have generally left my place in decent enough condition for my eventual return. And now that I've taken care of all sorts of business and cleaned up all sorts of messes, it's time to sleep and hope for a good conference - goodnight!

my favorite mistake

I have returned to the city of sin and the land of Karl the Fog, where I shall enjoy my own bed for six nights before jetting off to other adventures. Today was wildly uneventful - I woke up in my Iowa bed, spent some quality time upstairs talking to the parents, and then packed, ate lunch, and showered before they took me to Des Moines. The drive was smooth, and they kicked me to the airport curb just before 4pm (and by that I mean we made our sad farewells for now, although it did happen on the curb rather than in the airport).

The Des Moines to Denver flight was slightly early, and I was upgraded, so I enjoyed some wine and did some thinking about Lucy's story while in the air. When I got to Denver, I successfully got a standby seat on a flight leaving an hour earlier, so I only had to sit around for an hour and a half instead of two and a half hours. That break was well-utilized by eating a salad and drinking some more wine - so when I boarded the flight, I was done with all thinking about productivity and spent the trip reading MISTBORN instead (I'm still making my way through the third book, which I put down over a month ago because I was intent on finishing Rafe and Octavia's book before allowing myself to finish this one...so I know what I'll be doing this weekend).

And now, after a smooth lyft ride home, a shower, and some procrastination, it's time to sleep - goodnight!

oh, my daddy said shoot

So, today was supposed to be detox, but it's 1:30am and Vidya is asleep on my couch, so you know how this story ends. I woke up this morning and spent more time than I should have vegging on the couch with a smoothie. But I eventually got quite a bit done - I did some research that I wish I would have done months ago, since I stumbled across the life story of some random spy in Spain that would have fixed about a million and one issues with this book if I'd known about it before. So now I need to decide whether to incorporate that shit, or whether I should just give up and move on with my life.

Sssanyway. I also did laundry and unpacked, so that was all worthwhile. And I probably should have written all night, but I was lured out of the house by a text from Vidya and another text from Naureen to pursue a girls' night out at Benjamin Cooper. Girls' night out was a misnomer, since there were some guys there - but of the guys, I mostly hung out with Saurang (whom I'd met once before at an epic karaoke night with Ritu/Chandlord/et al) and his friend Carl, both of whom were utterly delightful (and extremely gay, so don't get any ideas if you're following along from home). I should have written my drinks off on my taxes since I sold some books to the adoring masses, but I didn't - fame is hard.

Sssanyway again. I ended up having two drinks, which was one more than I intended (and I have some prolonged conversation with the bartender about this, since he made fun of me for doing exactly what I had said I was going to do, which was to have one drink, close my tab, and then make him run the card again for the second drink). But my drinks were their twist on a boulevardier, which meant it was ideal for sipping slowly (I can't down bourbon cocktails quite as quickly as I can some of the others). I also inadvertently struck up a conversation with some guy who was in town for a wedding, but when Saurang asked me later if I was interested in him, I pointed out that the guy already had four daughters and I didn't need to accidentally complete his basketball team for him. So I would say that Saurang might be the best or worst wingman ever, depending upon what one wants.

Sssanyway for the final time. We eventually closed out, and Vidya and I parted ways from everyone and went across the street to a diner, where she had mozzarella sticks and I had scrambled eggs and hashbrowns (my late-night dinner of champions, although it wasn't as good as Grubstake). Then we came back here with the intention of watching a movie, but while I was washing my face, she fell asleep on my couch. So now I need to decide whether to wake her up so she can take care of her face (or take a cab home), or whether to let her sleep in an incredibly uncomfortable position. But this is a decision I shall make after signing off, thus leaving you in suspense - goodnight!

but the night was warm, we were bold and young

I'm nearing the end of my east coast voyage, and none too soon for my liver...I had a smoothie *and* kale today in an effort to reverse some of the trauma, which is a sign that I'm reaching the end of my body's ability to tolerate abuse. But today was pretty great, and I anticipate that tomorrow will be even better.

I spent the morning working, getting ready, and then working some more. The smoothie was procured at the juice bar next to a nearby Equinox, and its combo of almond milk, almond butter, dates, etc., was probably the healthiest thing I've eaten in at least a week. Then I went to Irving Farms, which is a small coffee chain in the city - they gave me iced coffee in a mason jar because they're so hip, and it fueled me up to get some serious writing done.

Really, I wanted to write all day, but I had to adjourn to the Times Square area for my social plan of the day. I had a late lunch and drinks with Kathia (remember her?), who took the train into the city to see me so I wouldn't have to go out to her neck of the woods. She seemed to be doing well, all things considered, and it was so great to see her. We caught up for a couple of hours over food and wine, and it was all totally lovely.

Then we walked to a wine bar and met up with her sister, and the three of us caught up some more over rosé flights (since that's how we roll). Then we walked to Grand Central, where we had another drink at a cafe (Cipriani) overlooking the main terminal, which was v. atmospheric. I really miss having Kathia in my general vicinity, and the time we spent together today wasn't enough - but it was better than nothing, and I'm glad I got to spend the time I did with her.

But by seven I really needed to go, so I parted ways with them and took a cab back to Terry's. We had cosmos in her apartment like we used to (although we only drank half of each, which was unusual), and then we had dinner at Joanne Trattoria. Fun fact: it's owned by Lady Gaga. We didn't see Lady Gaga there, but we did have a v. delicious meal - their gluten free pasta was quite good, especially with the truffle alfredo and chicken, and I was delighted with our meal. I was also delighted to spend some quality time with Terry - we haven't had a ton of time to ourselves to catch up, so we had a great conversation, and I continue to be tempted to move to NYC.

But that's a decision for a different day/week/month. We came home an hour or so ago, and she took care of her puppy, and now it's time for bed - I have most of tomorrow to myself and I intend to get as much work done as possible before our social activities begin again. Goodnight!

working hard to get my fill, everybody wants a thrill

I was pretty productive today, all in all, although I need to go to bed asap if I'm going to get out of bed by seven a.m. like I've been aiming for. And granted, today I got up at seven but then messed around for two hours. But I went to Philz by 9:30ish and spent a solid three hours working, which was v. necessary. At the end of it, I had a delightful, albeit brief, conversation with Ken, who is a karaoke master whom I met through Chandlord. In his daytime hours is a lawyer who works near Philz, and so I've now seen him there a couple of times - but today we tragically mistimed it by 15secs, since I vacated my table just as he was approaching and someone else swooped in to grab it before he could claim it. Sadness. But we caught up briefly, and I was somewhat able to verbalize key concepts (difficult, when I've been writing for three hours), and I tried to hook him on brain.fm - so we'll see if he's still human when I see him again or whether brain.fm has destroyed his brain like it has destroyed mine.

After that, I came home, procrastinated briefly, and then made myself a totally divine tuna melt - gluten free bread, fancy cheddar, and tuna packed in olive oil (mixed with mayonnaise, of course), with butter on the outside of the bread slices so that I could essentially make a grilled cheese with tuna in it. It was about as perfect as it could have been with gluten free bread, and I am salivating already thinking about how I can have it again tomorrow. Then I took a nap, because life is hard.

But I forced myself to write for another couple of hours in the afternoon, so that was good. Shit is getting real up in here, and by that I mean I need to be a productivity machine for the next couple of weeks. And so perhaps I shouldn't have gone out tonight - but I already had plans, and it was nice out, and so I kept my commitments.

And that meant walking down to AT&T Park and going to Cal night at the San Francisco Giants. I am obviously *not* a Cal supporter (although I'm not militant about it, like the people who spell it Kal as an insult), but several people in my extended friend group are, and so I went. John was there, as was Chandlord and Rajiv and Sheila, and I renewed my acquaintance with Charlotte (whom I met at Rajiv's birthday - we talked publishing through most of the eighth inning, which was totally fine by me). I hadn't been to a ballgame in forever (in fact, one of the only two times I can find via the blog was in 2004, in which I wrote a quaint post about how I was twenty-three and had thought I would have met the love of my life by then, but that it wasn't quite panic time yet, hahahahahahaha). So it was fun to see AT&T Park again, even if the game kind of sucked and the seats were fairly terrible and we lost 3-0. John and I walked around for a bit so I could see more of the ballpark than just our seats, so I saw the World Series trophies, but I mostly subsisted on garlic fries and wine (which is really all one needs in life, right?).

But I was done with sportsball by 10pm, so I left with Rajiv and Sheila and walked a few blocks with them. When we parted ways, I grabbed a lyft home - and now I need to sleep so that I can be productive tomorrow. Goodnight!

but the monsters turned out to be just trees...when the sun came up, you were looking at me

I went back to my former place of employment today to have lunch with my old boss. Before I did that, I got up not-so-early and did a couple of hours of work (some admin, some decent writing) while drinking iced coffee and regretting having to get out of bed. Then I showered and drove down to Mountain View - the traffic was fine at that time of day, but it was a good reminder that I never want to have to commute again.

When I got to campus, Sriram suggested going to Pear Republic, which is a cafe that opened sometime after I left - it's kind of amusing how trendy things are on campus, and he told me that no one goes to Coffee Lab anymore (which makes me sad, since I loved writing there in the early mornings before anyone showed up...although I suspect he's exaggerating). So we drove over there and checked out the cafe, and really, it was like every other fucking cafe on campus. Yes, I'm still jaded and spoiled despite having been gone for ten months.

But we caught up v. well, and I had a salad and some ice cream and grabbed a latte after, none of which I would have had if left to my own devices today. Then we went back to our building, and I hung out in the couch area with some of the people who used to report to me (actually, all four women who are still left on the team; the only remaining survivor missing was Andrew, which was too bad). It sounds like things are good there, and while I'm not tempted to ask for my job back in any real sense, it certainly would have been easier to just hang out there all afternoon and answer some email in exchange for millions of dollars rather than going off to write for nothing....

....but that's all an exaggeration. After I left, I went to Belmont and met up with Anne for a writing date, which was mostly a gossip date - she was in a bad mood/tired because her car battery died (and it's an electric car, and it's less than a year old), and the tow truck situation was a disaster, which interfered with her unusual biphasic sleep schedule, so she only had five hours of sleep today instead of eight. So she talked about her car, and her writing, and how difficult all this 'write for an audience' stuff is when we both really just want to write weird and interesting things. And I talked about going back to visit my old job and how it's both delightful and weirdly stressful/unhappy-making, and it was probably good that I met up with her and got it off my chest rather than coming home to do my taxes and spiraling into a 'I miss free food and easy companionship' mess if I'd spent the night alone.

sssanyway. So we talked for quite awhile, and then we forced ourselves to write for an hour, and I got a decent amount done. Then I drove home, procrastinated for a couple of hours to unwind from my social time, and then spent the rest of the night dealing with my tax situation. I'm seeing my CPA on Wednesday, so I was trying to get organized tonight - and after four hours of work, I'm getting there, but I still have a bunch of receipts to sort through tomorrow and reconcile with my Quickbooks. But the end is in sight, and hopefully I won't owe too much or else the 'I miss free food' spiral may start again in April.

But that's a worry for another day (and I don't think I'll owe much anyway)...now I need to sleep so that I can write like crazy tomorrow and also receipt-reconcile like crazy. Goodnight!

she's a runner, rebel and a stunner

I need to go to bed immediately - I didn't get enough done this morning, so I just worked for the past three hours, and now the morning is going to come all too soon. But I let myself sleep in this morning, which was probably a good thing since I was so exhausted yesterday. And then I spent the morning sending some emails and taking care of some business, and finishing with the unpacking and organizing of my apartment so that I can spend tomorrow preparing to leave it again.

Then I walked down to soma to visit my salon and get my eyebrows waxed - I had intended to drive to save some time, but it was a gorgeous day out, and walking through the Tenderloin is somehow less stressful than driving through it (albeit smellier on a warm day like today), so I walked instead. On the way home, I stopped at Jane on Larkin and wrote for a couple of hours - it's slowly coming together, and it needs to come together more quickly if I'm going to meet my deadline (which I am - I'm pretty committed now), but today was a good start after ten days away from it.

Then I got my nails done - since I'd gotten gel for the conference, I had to get it removed, and I got it put back on so that my nails look spiffy for the wedding I'm going to this weekend + the conference I have in SF next weekend. And then I came home, sat on my couch, and didn't do much.

But the night took a turn for the better - I met up with Chandlord, Katrina, and Annie for a girls' night out. This makes it sound like it was impromptu, but it took close to a month to organize because Annie was out of town and then I left. We had a v. lowkey dinner at an Afghani place a block from my house, and then we went to R Bar, where I had a surprisingly tasty margarita that did nothing to dull the pain of inadvertently seeing the last few minutes of the ISU/Baylor game. But we talked about books and boys and other ridiculous topics, and it was all quite delightful.

Then I came home, and I wanted to go to bed, but I instead spent the last three hours updating ebook files and metadata and prices on all the retailers - I have a promo coming up next week that I really needed to do some prep work for today, and I think I got through all of the mandatory stuff. I still want to update my website and do some cleaning up of review quotes + book descriptions for the books that aren't part of the promo (since if the promo goes well, people will look at buying the other books). But I at least took care of the pricing and metadata stuff that had to happen to make the promo go off smoothly.

But that took three hours, and now my eyes are crossing and I need to sleep. There are things about the writing job that aren't all that glamorous, and metadata updates are one of them - but I'm glad I got it done. And now, goodnight!

you can take back your memories, they're no good to me

You may have guessed, based on when I went to bed last night + the fact that I somehow ended up at Grubstake six hours after getting off of a trans-pacific flight, that today was going to be brutal for me - and if you guessed that, you guessed correctly. I couldn't really sleep in because it was too bright in my apartment by eight a.m., but I also couldn't really get anything done because I was too tired and too dehydrated after last night's adventures.

So, today was a bit of a wash - I had intended to hit it hard, but instead I mostly wanted to nap and cry (okay, maybe I am being melodramatic - but no sleep + the sudden adrenaline crash after a highly successful conference made me kind of cranky). However, it wasn't all bad - I got groceries, and I also did all my laundry, so it's possible that I will be able to feed and clothe myself for another few days. And I did a little bit of work, but mostly I napped.

But I had to rally and shower and get out of the apartment - I had dinner and drinks with someone who used to report to me, although I will not divulge names because I'm not sure that s/he wants it to be known that s/he still sees me. And I'm not sure that I want it to be known that I still see anyone at work either, outside of my occasional lunches, since I've been trying my best to distance myself from the shenanigans there and so have mostly avoided either extending or accepting invitations to do things (with some notable one-offs).

Still, it was good to see him/her - we went to Nectar for a drink, and then went to Aix for dinner, and it was all v. entertaining. Either s/he is attempting to suck up to me for reasons that make no sense since I have no sway/influence anymore, or it's true that I am still missed after nine months away - so I'll choose to believe the latter, since it's way nicer to believe that I was a rockstar (I was, after all) and so v. difficult to replace (I am, after all). Also, I'm v. modest.

So, it was all a v. lovely way to spend a couple of hours. Then we parted ways, and I came home, and I need to go to bed so that I can make up for some of my lost sleep. Goodnight!

you lured me in, i couldn't sense the pain

I got maybe five hours of sleep last night, which did not help my cold situation (which is definitely a situation). And today was mildly frustrating - I did some email-type stuff this morning, and then I walked down to the marina to see my aesthetician, but she totally flaked (and later claimed she'd thought she had texted me to cancel, but I never got it). So after waiting at her office for twenty minutes, I proceeded to my next plan, which was brunch at my favorite cafe. Tony didn't know I was sick, but he gave me a mimosa, and I'll pretend that the splash of orange juice had enough vitamins to make it healthy.

Then I walked home, put in a load of laundry, and took a twenty-minute nap that saved my life. Then I talked to Kathia for awhile; we had put a video chat on calendar so that we would actually catch up, and we actually accomplished it, so that was one of the day's bright spots.

But after I stopped talking to her, I had to finish my laundry, and I went to Walgreens to stock up on cold meds, and then I had to pack (and I have no idea if I packed all the right stuff, but I'm just gonna roll with it at this point). Packing was pretty slow, probably because I feel like death, and probably because I kept taking breaks to mess around on the internet (stupid internet).

But I'm all done packing, and I cleaned out my fridge and took out the trash and am generally leaving my apartment in okay shape. So now I'm going to go to bed and hope that 7.5hrs of sleep is enough to restore me a little bit.

But despite the rather depressed mood of this post...tomorrow I'll be in Hawaii, bitches! And I think this conference is going to be great for me, and the sun will be just as great. So if I can just make it onto the plane, everything else is golden. Goodnight!

and she was looking at herself, and things were looking like a movie

Perhaps I should have stayed home and watched political coverage like a good Wampler...politics are in my blood, although I've ignored that blood while living in California, where it feels that my vote doesn't matter and I don't feel any particular tie to the land or the community. But, needless to say, I didn't stay home....but more on that in a second.

First, the beginning of my day. I woke up and laid in bed daydreaming slightly longer than I should have, but I succeeded in forcing myself out of bed, and I was at Philz on Golden Gate by 9:15 (an eminently respectable time for someone who doesn't have to commute or hold herself to a schedule). I wrote a couple of pages more than I had and a couple of pages less than I should have, but I'll take it. Then I came home, ate some leftover pasta + sauce (omg, still, so delicious), and took a nap.

But I slothed as much as I could sloth, so I spent the afternoon taking care of a variety of business-y type tings in advance of my Hawaii trip. Then, eventually, I changed out of yoga pants and into real clothes (with a shower as an intermediary step) and walked down to the downtown area to pursue an evening of non-caucus-y fun.

First up was drinks and tacos with John at Novela - it was kind of a shitshow, and maybe I won't go back there again, but the wine was tasty and the tacos were good. And really, the only reason we were there was because it was close to the next plan of the night...my romance writing alter ego got free VIP tickets to an advance screening of the new Nicholas Sparks movie (THE CHOICE, out on Friday). This turned out to be an incredible experience. For one, you can apparently buy wine at the concession stand and take it in, which I did not know. For another, because we were VIP, we had great reserved seats, and also we didn't have to surrender our phones (everyone else had to surrender all electronics at the door, because apparently someone thought that someone might want to film/steal this, which is impossible).

So, we got to the theatre just in time, and the movie started without any trailers, and we were shushed by someone nearby within the first two minutes of the movie (apparently our witty and erudite commentary was not as welcome as we thought). All in all, it was so bad that it was good, or something. Or at least we enjoyed ourselves. And even though it was terrible, I still teared up a couple of times at the end, because beneath my resting bitch face lies a heart of gold.

After the movie was over, we went to another bar and split an italian hot sausage and fries, and I had another glass of wine, which was both totally unnecessary and totally necessary. And then we parted ways, and you can tell that I was tipsy because I got into the first available cab rather than calling a lyft like a good techie.

And now, I need to sleep so that I can call my parents tomorrow and get the caucus lowdown, and also get some writing done, and also keep prepping for Hawaii. Goodnight!

she's been living on the highest shelf

There is a chance that I won't blog tomorrow night (second time in six days is unheard of, I know) - I'm currently planning to visit John and Jess at a cabin they're renting in the north bay, and they have said that wifi is spotty and cell reception nonexistent. So if you don't hear from me, don't assume I'm dead - I will hopefully be continuing to ramp up my week of extreme socializing in a delightfully remote location.

Anyway. Today was relatively quiet compared to what I've got coming up, which was probably a good thing since I barely slept last night - I ended up not falling asleep until almost two a.m., and thanks to the whisky/tequila with Chandlord + the heavy rain on the skylights above my bed + the significantly noisier surroundings after three weeks in Iowa, I slept fitfully at best. So I spent most of today in a tired haze, which didn't make for much productivity (I didn't even try to write).

But I did a bunch of stuff around the house and finished unpacking. And I walked down to the marina to see my aesthetician, and then I had a long, leisurely brunch at Caffe Union. They were pretty quiet today, so Tony and I talked for a long time, which was a perfect interlude. Then I walked home, took a brief nap, did some more work + some stuff around the house, and then drove to the Mission to get my bangs trimmed (I now look merely cute again, rather than like a bitchy model-type - but I can certainly see better).

When I got home, I was torn between eating here, going out, ordering in, or not eating at all - I was too tired to make a decision, and I defaulted to not eating for too long, which meant my blood sugar demanded instant satisfaction. So I ate some yogurt and some fritos (dinner of champions), then did a bunch of work, and then ate a gluten free bagel with cream cheese and salmon (the bagel, which was not from my usual brand, was horrible, but the salmon went a long way toward reviving me).

And now, I think I'll go to bed early and hope I get nine hours of sleep - I have a massive quantity of plans tomorrow (lunch with writer friends, afternoon writing date, early bird dinner with the Shedletskys, and then a drive to the north bay), so I should probably rest up. Goodnight!

turn up the lights in here, baby

Happy new year! This is my first post of 2016, and my 3773rd post overall - sometime later this year, I'll hit my 4000th post. Yes, I'm old.

But that's not the news I want to deliver to you today. Instead, I shall commence with what I always commence with - the boring minutiae of my day-to-day. I spent the morning/midday/afternoon guzzling iced coffee and working on some romance business stuff while kind of, sort of talking to my mom in the kitchen. Eventually, I took a break for some internet time, and I showered, all of which was v. necessary. And we also eventually had supper (cheeseburgers, and also french fries fried in beef tallow, because we are living the ultimate #throwback #smalltownlife - those french fries are fucking delicious, and I may have licked a couple to keep [censored] from enjoying them).

On a normal Iowa New Year's Eve, I would spend the evening messing around in my journal while my parents slept/snored in the living room. There is only one NYE when I went out in Iowa, and that was an epic shitshow that resulted in me getting glass embedded in my foot and leaving bloody footprints all over the hotel bathroom after drinking far far far too much with Katie (the queen of my heart) in Des Moines. But tonight, I decided to tempt fate and go out again. However, given that the destination was [censored]'s best friend's house, and given that there is a baby in residence there, I was pretty sure that I was safe.

And yes, I was safe - but it was still fun. We sat around and drank wine and heard far too many stories about [censored] and friends' adventures at [censored] or while [censored]. And we also played a lot of Cards Against Humanity, which was highly entertaining. But all things must end, so eventually [censored] and I came home, and I am sure I shall regret the wine I drank tonight when I wake up tomorrow.

But tomorrow is another day (actually, it is today).

sssanyway. I hope you all have a happy, healthy, wonderful new year! Perhaps I shall recount some goals for you in a later post, but right now the wine has me at the place where I can only say that my goals are to 'write all the fucking books' and 'seize all the fucking opportunities' (and no comment on how to parse 'fucking books' and 'fucking opportunities' - you're smart, you can figure it out). Goodnight!

so tie me to a post and block my ears

Today I sorted through some of the detritus of my childhood, with the overall goal of getting my room sufficiently organized so it's easier to get work done here during the various weeks that I spend in Iowa over the course of most years. Since I usually spend 4-6 weeks here depending on my travel schedule and when I can make it home, that's probably too much time to spend not writing. Also, opening my closet and seeing a trainwreck kind of bums me out.

So I finished cleaning off my bookshelves, and I emptied out a lot of random crap from my closet that can be donated/tossed. I suspect some of it will be rescued from destruction by my family when they see what I'm giving up (there was some muttering from the person I share a wall with about my desire to get rid of my Pioneer seed corn-themed basketball from the 1980s, which is now mostly deflated...and I was never good at basketball anyway, and I already gave a sentimental reprieve to my tee-ball glove even though I sucked at that too). But I did as much organizing as I planned to, and my desk is usable and there's now way more room in my closet for actual clothes when I come home, so I'm happy with my progress.

Of course, I didn't spend all day doing that; I slept in, and I also took an unexpectedly-long lunch break. My mom and I were alone since my dad and [censored] had a variety of things to take care of outside the house, and so we had a long, meandering conversation while I drank iced coffee and chose to talk rather than sift through my closet. And then I did more stuff in my room, took another break for supper, finished throwing stuff away so I could get to my bed again, and then stopped it all to watch the Kennedy Center Honors.

Loyal readers know that the Kennedy Center Honors is one of my favorite television nights of the year. While I felt no real personal connection to any of the honorees this year, I cried during several of their stories, so it lived up to its usual self. I think I really just enjoy watching them be so surprised/emotional about the tributes to them, and to see their work recognized in such a delightful way.

After that, I messed around online, did some romance-related work, and now need to sleep so I can get more stuff done tomorrow - goodnight!

we keep this love in a photograph

I didn't get the ten hours of sleep that I hoped for last night, but it was pretty close. When I woke up, I stayed in bed for awhile daydreaming/ruminating, but I eventually dragged myself out from under the covers, took a shower, and did a few hours of work. I didn't get any writing done, but I had a lot of stuff to take care of, and I got through a decent amount.

Then I vacated the apartment and went to the Mission, where I got a haircut so that I can see again; my bangs recently surpassed super-stylish, and it was time to trim them up. Then I came home, messed around for a bit, and decided to walk downtown and go to the mall before my dinner plans.

This turned out to be a great decision (for my acquisitive heart, at least, if not my bank account). When I got there, I talked briefly to [censored] about [censored] while drinking a tea, and then I went to Nordstrom and very efficiently parted myself of some money in exchange for some goods. The first stop was the lingerie department to buy a bra for the dress I want to wear tomorrow (success, I think; well, success in the fact that I bought three, although whether any of them will work remains to be seen).

The second stop was the shoe department for a pair of suede boots that I've had my eye on for months. In a highly amusing turn of events, the guy who helped me was the guy who sold me my Jimmy Choo sandals back in March (for the charity gala I went to, although I didn't wear them because my dress selection changed). He actually remembered the Jimmy Choos, and where I previously worked, and who I was going to the gala with - all of which was astonishing, and even he seemed astonished since he claims he doesn't remember people that well. So I bought the boots from him while telling him that I now write romance novels and hate men, and we had a highly amusing fifteen minutes as a result.

Ah, memories.

Then I left the mall and met up with the original Jen Lui for drinks and dinner at Gitane. We had a lot to catch up on, so we had a drink at the bar, and then spent two hours splitting a variety of food items (we overordered, since the server told us we weren't ordering enough - she was wrong). It was great to see her, even if our conversations tend to veer toward concern/depression over getting older (as all conversations do these days, it seems).

And then we parted ways, and I started to walk home, but when I saw my first crackhead, I promptly called a lyft to take me the remaining six blocks (I wasn't feeling the crackhead scene today, since when I had been driving at noon today, one of them lurched toward my passenger door as though he was going to get in, so I had to lock my doors, which was all very bizrre). And now I need to sleep - I am running away to Healdsburg tomorrow, so I need to get up and pack and hopefully write for a couple of hours before that happens. Goodnight!

you don't mess with love, you mess with the truth

I'm totally wiped out - the last two weeks have been pretty draining, somehow, despite the fun I had in Denver and the additional fun I had in New York. Some of it is probably the realization that I need to really, truly take a break from Rafe and Octavia's book and work on something else for awhile - I need to take a step back, stop pressuring myself, and find my voice again. Some of it is probably the fact that 2015 is coming to an end, and while there were many wonderful things about this year, there were definitely areas where I didn't make as much (or any) progress as I had intended.

But I feel like I'm turning a corner and figuring out the changes I need to make to be productive again, so that's all great. And I've got more fun things on tap this week before going back to Iowa for what will almost certainly be a restorative couple of weeks, so that's all good. Tonight, though, going to bed is probably the most important thing...

But first, my day. I slept okay last night despite my caffeine experience, which was kind of shocking. When I woke up, I went to Philz for a couple of hours and scribbled in my notebook. Then I came home and talked to someone who used to work for me; she's in business school and wanted to check in on her plans for next year, so we caught up for an hour over the phone.

At that point I really kind of wanted a nap, but I had committed to another writing date in San Mateo, so I drove down. Anne and Barbara were great to see, as per usual; as per usual, we also talked too much, but eventually we buckled down and I did some good work on the young adult series, which really pleased me. Unfortunately, since we talked so much, and since I actually wanted to get some work done, I stayed there until 5:45, which was deadly for traffic - it took me an hour to get home, and reminded me how glad I am that I no longer have to commute. It was worth it, though, since I won't see Anne and Barbara again until the new year, and I probably wouldn't have gotten anything done in my exhausted haze if I'd stayed home this afternoon.

When I got home, I ate a sandwich, and then I scribbled some more, and then I answered some emails and took care of sundry tasks. And now that I've taken care of my last sundry task (aka making sure my mother knows I'm alive for the day), I'm going to crawl into bed and hope I get at least ten hours of sleep - goodnight!

blow a kiss, fire a gun

I have nothing that I care to share with you today, but I'll cobble together something. I woke up feeling like I might be coming down with something, so I canceled on lunch with Gyre and lazed in bed for awhile (necessary, since I hadn't slept well last night). But I eventually got out of bed, did some bona fide work, showered, ate a snack, and went to San Mateo to write with Barbara and Anne. This turned into more talking than writing, but since I was in the mood to talk, that wasn't such a bad thing. But I reread a bunch of notes on my young adult series and realized I have some good stuff going, so I'm going to keep going with it for awhile and see if it helps me to get back into the writing groove.

Then I drove back to the city, braving the traffic on 280, and stopped at Starbucks to grab tea - probably ill-advised, and I might be up all night ruminating thanks to the caffeine, but it seemed like a good idea at the time. Then I came home, opened a bottle of wine, ordered a pizza, and dealt with a variety of email-related tasks until now.

And now, on that incredibly boring note, I shall leave you in suspense for another day to see if tomorrow's post is more interesting. Goodnight!

i'm so sick of that same old love

As expected, this morning was kind of fucked since I stayed up way too late last night. I ended up waking up at seven unable to sleep, so I messed around on my laptop and kind of half-assed made an attempt at writing for a couple of hours, and then I dozed for another hour (truly, lazing about in bed is the best thing, although maybe it's not good for productivity). But eventually I dragged myself out of bed and into some clothes, and I walked to the marina and had brunch at my favorite cafe. I also talked to Tony for a little bit (back in the kitchen, since he didn't have time to hang out in the front), which was lovely. Then I walked down Union Street and bought a couple of pairs of workout tights, since they were on massive sale.

At that point I should have gone to the gym, or gone to a cafe to write (I had schlepped my backpack with both my laptop and my kettlebell chalk), but I simply wasn't feeling it, so I walked home and decided to count the fact that I'd carried my backpack for 2.5 miles as good enough (spoiler: it's not enough, but whatever). I messed around online some more, and then I called my parents, who seemed to be good (well, except for the weather, and a brief discussion about how humanity is totally fucked in terms of antibiotics going forward, and my dad's hammered finger (which sounds horrendous)).

But once I was off the phone, I decided to get off my ass and get something done. Luckily, I had changed the kitchen lightbulb earlier in the day (it burned out a few days ago, oddly, since I changed it a few months ago, so I ordered a better version of the lightbulb from Amazon to see if a higher quality bulb would last longer), so I was able to actually do the stuff in the kitchen that I've been wanting/needing to do.

That involved both cooking and cleaning. I had bought groceries on Tuesday to make something new, but I had gotten sidetracked and didn't have a kitchen light, so I didn't get around to cooking until tonight. I made pasta all' amatriciana from a Mario Batali recipe, and it turned out to be awesome (way more pleasurable than the questionable gluten free baked dish I made from his cookbook a few weeks ago). It took quite a bit of time, though - not a lot of active time, but I first had to make his basic tomato sauce, which takes well over an hour to simmer down (and even then, I have to immersion blend it to break up the whole tomatoes). Then I used some of that sauce in the amatriciana - but the main point of amatriciana is the 12oz of bacon and the onion and the garlic and the red pepper flakes, all of which were cooked together before adding the sauce.

While all of that was cooking, I cleaned out the fridge, took out the recycling and compost and trash (the compost had some v. impressive mold), and generally tidied up, which made me feel better about leaving my apartment this coming week. Then, I finished up the pasta dish by making some gluten free spaghetti, mixing in the sauce, and topping it with grated pecorino romano. I also opened a mini bottle of champagne because that's how I roll. You can see the finished product (before I devoured it) on my instagram, if you're so curious; the recipe is here (although I have the whole cookbook).

That all made me feel v. self-satisfied, and I have leftovers for tomorrow (too many leftovers! but maybe I'll eat it twice!). I also had four cups of the basic tomato sauce left, which I threw into two bags in the freezer, so I can use them to make other sauces without having to go through the initial basic sauce construction step. Side note: the web recipe says to crush the tomatoes by hand before putting into the sauce, which explains why they never cook down and I have to immersion blend. So I'm not sure why he doesn't just call for crushed tomatoes to begin with, but whatever.

So after all my kitchen adventures, I was still feeling productive, so I answered email and made a Christmas list and did a variety of other necessary tasks. And now I desperately need to sleep and regain some of what I lost last night - goodnight!

balkanized

I just stayed up way later than I planned, which means I'm going to get up later than planned, which will throw my morning plan of writing/gym/brunch (in some yet-to-be-determined order) into chaos. However, today was okay, and tonight was great, so I have no regrets. I spent the day hermiting out, although I left the apartment to write for a couple of hours at Philz. I also grabbed pho at Mangosteen, which was tasty, but my walk home through the Tenderloin left me despairing about the human condition.

So when I got home, I canceled my plan of walking to the Mission (I couldn't handle the idea of more filth), took a brief nap, and then drove to the Mission instead. On the way, I picked up Katrina, who was the instigator of tonight's fun times. We found parking immediately upon arrival at our destination (Thanksgiving weekend, with everyone out of town, is magical), and we had a drink at Zoe's (I misordered, since I should have had the rum drink of my heart rather than going for the more 'respectable' gin and egg white concoction....but my drink was called 'Trouble and Strife', which was appropriate, and it tasted good enough). We caught up on life while hanging out at the bar, which was lovely...

...but we weren't there to see each other. We were there to walk down the street to Red Poppy Art House, which would better be called a room, since it is a single room. We got one of the last good spaces upon arrival (there were no chairs left, but I grabbed a barstool and Katrina grabbed a pillar to lean against, and we could see over the chairs in front of us, so it wasn't that bad), and the venue kept packing people in to the point that I started daydreaming about all the fire code violations.

But there was no fire, only music (and dancing). The performer was Istanbul Connection, which is some strange Balkan/Latin music collaboration between members of a bunch of different bands (including Inspector Gadje, whom Katrina adores). They started off playing rather Balkan-sounding stuff, which I really enjoyed a lot. But the second half of the set was a little too dominated by Latin music for my tastes - I would have rather kept with the Eastern European theme.

However, the woman who danced for some of the songs was excellent, and there were some really excellent musicians (I love drummers, and the clarinet and sax players were both quite good). There was one strange moment where an audience member got up and danced in front of everyone, but that just added to the surreal experience (and my sudden, crushing desire to run away and have an 'Eat Pray Love' moment and eventually write a memoir).

So the concert was great, and a perfect mellow way to spend a Saturday evening. Once it was over, I dropped Katrina off at home, and then came home and have been messing around on my computer since then.

And now I must sleep - goodnight!