slow down my bleeding heart

I have nothing to say about today and almost didn't blog at all, but I can't break my streak just because I feel apathetic. The writing did. not. go. well. Which, really, is all I need to say, right? I woke up at noon, since I failed to set an alarm (thinking that I would wake up automatically at ten or eleven), then got dressed, made lunch (scrambled eggs with ham and cheese, which were delicious), and proceeded to bang my head against my desk for a couple of hours. Around four p.m., I thought perhaps I should leave the house and get one of those ridiculously awful convenience store cappuccinos, but instead I decided to go for a walk. It was 37 degrees and the gravel road was slightly squishy since it rained a few days ago and the ground hasn't frozen yet, so I was quite cold despite wearing sweats over a pair of running tights from high school and my ancient hot pink bomber jacket with fur trim. But I walked to the cemetery, which is approximately a mile away by road, and didn't get mauled by a bobcat, so I consider it a success. My dad drove by and found me, then showed me his tiling operation in the field once owned by my great-grandfather (hint: tiling has nothing to do with decorative tile, and everything to do with drainage).

After we got home, I banged my head on my desk for another hour or two, and then ate supper with the family (roast beef, roast potatoes, roast carrots, gravy, leftover apricot salad). Then I refused [censored]'s offer to watch [censored] and tried to write some more, with limited success. I reread my entire journal instead, which isn't a huge feat since I rarely write in it because I'm usually either writing a manuscript or writing the blog, but it was a worthwhile exercise to see how my thinking has progressed over the past eighteen months. I also started sketching out a possible research trip to England and France in the spring, which is the last thing I need to be spending time on right now (which of course makes it the most appealing thing to think about).

So now I'm going to go to bed and set my alarm so that I get up earlier than noon (but not by much, since it's 3am here) -- I really must write tomorrow, and I also must pack since I go back to California on Wednesday. Goodnight!