one day you're in...the next day, you're out

So, dear readers, the time has come to announce something that I've been keeping closer to the vest for the past month: I've resigned my position with my current employer and am going to spend the next couple of years writing full-time. I'm finally divulging it on the blog because today marked an important milestone: we filed my resignation officially in the system, and my last day will be October 15. That's three weeks from tomorrow, for those of you keeping score, and is going to come extremely fast; when I originally resigned in August, I told the big boss I would stay until we found my replacement, but since we're looking externally and the hiring process can easily take six to nine months, I decided that I didn't want to drag it out that long. She was her usual v. good self about it, letting me leave on the date requested without making any arguments, although she did say she didn't know what they would do without me, etc.

This is all crazy and wonderful and terrifying. When I left work to go to class yesterday, I was both elated and scared, and the adrenaline was definitely flowing. I've been with this company for seven years, and it's the only full-time job I've ever had. I love my coworkers (well, most of them), believe in our mission, and think that the company will do some amazing things in the years and decades ahead. And it was a v. tough decision; I was flipping through the exit survey I have to take, and I realized that a lot of the questions don't really apply to me. I'm not leaving because I'm dissatisfied (even if I was sometimes bored or stressed), and the big boss is amazing to work with, which is probably why I stayed as long as I did.

Instead, I'm leaving because I've been feeling for a long time that the more time I spend focused on a corporate career, the less time I have to pursue my real dreams and try to turn them into reality. The company I work for is amazing, but it's not my dream -- and it's time to spend my energies on my own projects.

I'm staying in California while I do this (unless I decide to travel for awhile next year, but we'll see) because I realized when I took my sabbatical that writing is already isolating enough without the added problem of doing it someplace with a v. limited social circle. My savings would go much farther in a cheaper place, but I would also end up massively depressed, which would sort of defeat the purpose of taking some time to focus on my passions. So, those of you who are in California should be prepared for me to make lunch/dinner/movie plans more often, if only so I get out of the house and don't go crazy.

Obviously that's the biggest thing going on right now; everything else is just noise. I slogged all day today, since I have a ton of work to get done before I leave, and had lunch with John (I will miss working someplace where I can say 'meet me at the dinosaur in five minutes' and then meet up with someone at a life-sized skeletal replica of a t-rex). I left around six-thirty, came home, made dinner because I was ravenous, and then called my mother. I accidentally fell asleep and then spent a couple of hours taking care of a variety of tasks after I woke up, so I didn't do any writing tonight. Since I don't have any plans this weekend, there will be time enough for writing later -- for now, I'm going to do one last thing for the soon-to-be-dead day job, and then go to sleep. Goodnight!

Daily word count: - (0% of goal)
Productive time: 0hrs
RescueTime productivity rating: -- (global average: 0.88)