i guess that's deja vu

Another rainy, boring (for you) day that left me feeling v. content with how much I got done and what I'm up to in general. Yes, that's a sentence fragment - clearly I'm not ready to start writing Rafe and Octavia's story yet. I slept until eightish, took care of some stuff online, got dressed, chatted with [censored], and then went out into the rain to get a manicure (so wonderful, so unnecessary). After I was properly painted, I grabbed lunch, then came home and worked on stuff all afternoon. This mostly consisted of taking care of tings in and around my desk; I'm still not through my horribly massive to-do list, but I'm happy with what I got done today.

I had intended to be social tonight (and I actually had three potential plans, which is three more than I usually have), but I was committed to hanging out with Terry since she's going to NYC tomorrow. However, she's also deathly ill, so we had a v. low-key evening and stayed close to home so she could recuperate. And when we were done catching up, I gave up on the idea of being more productive (see: attempting to be kinder to myself, Day 1) and instead put some face products on my skin and read a book for the last thirty minutes.

But even though it's only nine p.m., I'm going to go to bed and hope that I can miraculously readjust to my weird early-to-bed, early-to-rise ways from pre-vacation - as bad as the commute has been, getting up super early is my only hope. Goodnight!

just when you think that you're in control...just when you get on a roll

Today was entirely dedicated to getting through some long-standing items on my to-do list. This is all going to be entirely boring for you, so I'll gloss over it - I had breakfast down the street, did some banking-related activities, did some clothes-purchasing activities, came home and said goodbye to Terry's family, and then spent the afternoon cleaning out my linen closet. 'Linen closet' is a bit of a misnomer since it's also the closet where I keep my makeup, toiletries, first aid items, purses, and gym stuff, and it had all become a horrifying, unnavigable mess in the last few months as I kept dumping stuff into it and ignoring it in the interest of staying focused on my book. But it's clean now, and while I have to haul several bags of stuff downstairs tomorrow, this is all a good thing.

But I stopped at six, took a shower, and rendezvoused with Kathia for dinner at Aix and a drink after at Nectar. I hadn't seen her in three weeks, and the last time I saw her was the first time I'd seen her since before I went to Germany and she went to Italy, so we were v. long overdue for a catch-up. This was properly accomplished over dinner (I am appalled at myself for becoming someone who eagerly orders the beet salad), and we continued by drinking wine at Nectar (where they attempted to overserve us, but I walked away from a half-full glass so that I could maintain my intended limit in hopes of sleeping tonight and working tomorrow).

And now I must sleep; I still have a lot of random stuff that I want to take care of tomorrow, although the most important task is working on the paperback formatting for my latest release (which I can perhaps do before work a couple of mornings this week, but it would be a good idea to start on it tomorrow). Goodnight!

outside it starts to pour

Today was a perfectly relaxing day, but I think I shall start being productive tomorrow. I woke up later than I thought I would but earlier than I wanted to and drove to the south bay to train with Alyssa, since I'd already missed one session this week and didn't want to miss another. She was in good form, and she also forced me up to swinging the 24kg bell, which was an interesting experience (interesting in that it didn't kill me, so I think that's a good thing?). After training, we had lunch together at Joanie's since I didn't have to work and she was done for the day, and we caught up on life and my goals for the next few months, which was v. nice. Then I grabbed a coffee at Philz, drove home, talked to Terry's family, and immediately vacated the premises for a waxing appointment.

But my vacating wasn't long enough, and when I came back they were all still here [note: this is not actually a hardship, but since I'm feeling rather hermity, I like to pretend this is the biggest tragedy ever]. So I went with Terry and a couple of her female relatives to get pedicures, which was lovely. Then I vacated the premises again to have dinner by myself, since I really did need some solitude. I ended up at my favorite Greek place, where it became clear that I've successfully befriended the bartender since I only paid for two glasses of wine, but had something more like four glasses of wine + a tiny glass of dessert-style sweet Riesling (note: I did not ask for the extra wine or the 'dessert'). This was all much appreciated, of course. I also spent some quality time reading on my tablet; Alyssa recommended some self-help book that I'm still on the fence over, but it might be thought-provoking, so I'm going to keep going for awhile.

Then I came home, hung out with Terry's family for a couple of hours, and am now going to sleep so that I can attempt productivity tomorrow. I have nothing truly pressing, but I'd like to cross some longstanding life to-dos off my list, so we'll see what I can accomplish in the rain. Goodnight!

i hate the beach, but here i stand in california with my toes in the sand

I'm happy to report that I'm back from Hawaii, miraculously on time and somehow not sunburned despite spending four days doing nothing but subjecting my alabaster skin to the sun. As much as I was ready to go home, I will admit that it was a little sad that I didn't get to lie in the sun anymore today - I had to leave the hotel around ten to take Heather (aka dear respected madam) to her new hotel on the other side of the island before driving back to the airport and returning the rental car. But Heather and I had breakfast together before parting ways, so that was lovely. And the rest of my day was entirely uneventful - I was ridiculously early to the airport, which was sucked up by the place where I ate lunch taking 45mins to make my food, so I didn't really sit around at the gate before boarding. I had used miles to upgrade to first class, which was a totally winning move - that gave me five hours in a little cocoon of solitude to do some work and continue my daydreaming.

And now that I'm home safe in my own bed, with San Francisco's fog blanketing the city and erasing all memory of the sun, it's time for bed - I have grand plans to train with Alyssa tomorrow and then start repairing the shambles I've made of my life by ignoring everything but the book and the day job for the last two (three, four, six) months, so wish me luck with that. Goodnight!

we gonna party like it's your birthday

Today was a perfectly lazy end to an exceedingly lazy vacation. We woke up relatively early and had breakfast, and then I laid by the pool and didn't do anything other than reapply sunscreen until three pm. I think it's good that I'm going home tomorrow since I would get bored of lying around and being in my own head if I repeated this again, but this had been an awesome break from everything. And I'm definitely going to miss the sun, particularly since it looks like it's going to storm in the bay area this weekend.

But I'm ready to go home, and I'm ready to not travel quite so much next year (although I always say that, so let's see what I actually do). Heather and I ended the trip on a high note - we went to a luau at Lahaina, where they had a big buffet and a lot of awesome dancing. Heather's cousin works there, so our seats were in a great location...but unfortunately we shared a table with three newlywed couples, which was nigh on insufferable since they spent the whole conversation comparing notes about their weddings and engagements. Ugh. But the dancing was great and it was good to get out of the hotel area, so it was definitely worth going to.

But now I must sleep - my flight is at a reasonable hour tomorrow, but I'm taking Heather to another hotel across the island first since she's staying a couple of extra days, so I can't dilly-dally. Goodnight! And have a great thanksgiving!

i'm just gonna shake shake shake shake shake

First, allow me to say, if you haven't figured it out already, that all entries in Hawaii are typed on my phone. So if you see weird typos, don't assume I'm failing to shower you with my usual attention to detail!

Second, today was again incredibly lazy. Heather and I had breakfast, and then I laid out by the pool for a couple of hours, daydreamed about Rafe, and contemplated life. Then I had a spa treatment, which was completely perfect. Heather had gotten a couple as well, and we rendezvoused in the quiet room after and chatted until we were ready to leave. Then we had an early dinner/drinks in the lounge before coming back to the room and reading - I finished the latest Kresley Cole book, which I'd been looking forward to for four years and so was, sadly, a bit disappointed by.

But now I'm going to continue my relaxation and go to bed - goodnight!

or it can be over, or we can just leave it here

Today was exactly the repeat of yesterday that I had hoped for - I got nine hours of sleep instead of five, I didn't drink enough to get dehydrated, and it was all v wonderful. Heather and I had breakfast together, and then I took a walk (shorter than it probably should have been, but I felt smug anyway) before putting on my swimsuit, dousing myself in sunscreen, and worshipping Apollo.

That continued throughout the day, with a bit of reading (about Charlemagne, because I'm a dork), some drinking of pina coladas some pool time, some lunch, and a whole lot of listening to music and letting my thoughts wander. I came in around five (with only a bit of burn on my chest, which is a miracle), took a short, read, curled my hair, and generally got ready.

Our destination tonight was Nick's Fish Market, with was awesome - my snapper was perfect, and the wine was delightful. And the company was awesome too, of course. But now I feel like sleeping so I can hit the relaxation even harder tomorrow - goodnight!

but she still likes to dance with my punchlines

Today was an extraordinarily lazy day, even by vacation standards. It started far earlier than intended - I woke up at six, after 5.5hrs of sleep, and couldn't go back to sleep because my body is insisting on becoming a morning person. Stupid. So Heather and I hung out on the balcony for a bit, then had breakfast (mostly good, although they refused to serve me a mimosa because I'd left my ID in the room and I apparently look twelve without makeup).

And then we spent the entire rest of the day by the pool. I had 3.5 mai tais, and yet I managed to not burn myself (even when I fell asleep) or drown, and I had my usual call with my parents, so I felt like it was quite successful.

But I was wiped out from lack of sleep and dehydration, so even though I showered and made myself up, I was quite happy to encourage Heather to order room service instead. And I started reading a Kresley Cole book just to keep myself awake, since I desperately wanted to sleep at eight pm and knew that giving into that desire was madness. But now that I've made it to 10:30, I'm going to go to bed and hope tomorrow is a glorious repeat of today (but with more sleep and water). Goodnight!

caught in the undertow

I'm in Maui, bitches! Maybe that's not a kind thing to say to those of you who aren't here, but #sorrynotsorry. Today was entirely taken up with getting ready for and leaving on my trip. I got up reasonably early and packed, then had brunch with Terry at my favorite cafe (where Tony, the owner, gave us mimosas for thanksgiving). After brunch, I sped over to my nail place to get them to fix a premature chip in my manicure (I'm insufferable these days), picked up some last minute tings, and then did an hour of day job work to leave things in good shape for my absence.

And then I went to the airposte, sped through security, ate a late lunch, grabbed some coffee, and departed slightly late but mostly without incident. I spent the plane ride drinking a glass of champagne (well, cava, but I can suffer pedestrian sparkling wines occasionally) and reading a book - I got all the way through THE COLDEST GIRL IN COLDTOWN, a vampire YA that I really mostly liked. I finished it at the Maui airport while waiting for Heather, who landed twenty minutes after me...and then our vacation began in earnest.

We found the rental car with nowhere near as much trouble as the experience I had picking up a rental car in Germany last month, then drove to our hotel. We are staying in a deliciously fancy place, where we had deliciously fancy cocktails and I embraced the fact that I may be the only person I know who genuinely enjoys mai tais. We also ate a late dinner while beginning to catch up - I've barely seen Heather (aka dear respected madam) in months, so our days of solitude together are long overdue.

But now it's 12:30am here, which is 2:30am in California, and I'm desperate to sleep so that I can spend tomorrow pursuing either cirrhosis or melanoma. Goodnight!

every second i waste is more than i can take

The only thing that matters is that I'm going to Hawaii tomorrow. YAY. My flight isn't until fourish, which is good since I haven't started packing and still have some work to do. But today was long and somewhat tiring - my workout with Alyssa was good enough that I'll probably be sore tomorrow, and then I slogged quite diligently until it was time to leave the office to beat traffic. And then I spent the evening running errands and having dinner with Terry, all of which was necessary to get me ready for my trip.

But now I should sleep - even though it's still early, I'm too wiped out to do anything effectively, and I'd rather get nine hours of sleep and then take care of business. Goodnight!

the cold never bothered me anyway

If every day was like today, I would probably quit my job and go off the grid forevermore. Not that the job itself was that bad (although it wasn't pretty) - the real issue was my commute, which took an hour and twenty minutes when I left my house at 6:30, and took another hour and twenty minutes when I left my office at 8pm. Ugh. The rain today was a good thing, but it made for a miserable day...

...but that's all you get tonight, since I need to do it again tomorrow. And then the next day I get to go to Hawaii, which will be infinitely better. Goodnight!

i'm friends with the monster that's under my bed

I had a fairly awesome day, all things considered - I was able to sleep until 7:30, and then I took a single meeting from nine to ten before calling my father to wish him happy birthday (happy birthday, Dad!). Then I left for my team's offsite in Half Moon Bay (with a quick stop to get coffee, followed by several stops to pick up various coworkers in the city on the way).

The offsite actually went smashingly, despite the weather - it rained for the first time in forever, which was v. poor timing, but everyone seemed to have a great time despite it. We had lunch at Sam's Chowder House - the food was delish, and we had a room to ourselves, and I enjoyed the wine (which makes sense, since I picked it). We also played a trivia game about the team, which was just enough enforced team fun to feel okay without being onerous. Then we adjourned to the beach for ten minutes to say we did it, but as it had begun to rain, ten minutes was more than enough. Instead, we went down the road to Half Moon Bay Brewing Company, where we hung out in the bar, and where some people played games while others talked and drank, etc.

So that was all perfectly lovely. We left Half Moon Bay around 4:15, and I was home by 5:30 (it would have been a lot sooner, since there was no traffic, but I had to drop all these fools off in different corners of the city). Then I had an hour to mess around before going around the corner to have dinner with Jenni - I hadn't seen her in many months, which is crazy, and so we were very long overdue for a catch-up. We accomplished this over wine and salad at Ottimista Enoteca, and are now committed to getting together and catching up again after the holidays. Then I came home, tried out my new curling iron (success), and am now going to take my curly-haired self to bed so I can get up super early and beat traffic. Goodnight!

come on baby in our dreams, we can live our misbehavior

My headache is still going strong after a week of mostly-headachy situations, but I'm hoping that some relaxation at my team's offsite tomorrow will help. Granted, it's probably going to rain and ruin everything, but at least I can sleep in a bit since I'm leaving from San Francisco rather than having to navigate my horrendous commute. Today was mostly okay, though; I took two hours of meetings from home, drove down and trained with Alyssa, showered, had lunch, did a bit of work, and then took some much-needed moments of solitude to grab coffee from another building. And then I had meetings the rest of the day, but I didn't murder (or even want to murder!) anyone during them, so I think that's a good thing?

But then I had a v. lovely dinner with Joann; we tried to go to our usual sushi place, but it apparently closed down, so we ended up with Chinese instead. Our conversation was by turns hilarious and heartwrenching, and it was great to hang out with her (as it always is). And now I'm going to try to get nine hours of sleep and hope it kills my headache - goodnight!

if you close your eyes, does it almost feel like nothing changed at all

I had a smashing headache all day today, which was only relieved by taking four ibuprofen at lunch - but I can't keep taking that much ibuprofen or else it will destroy my stomach, so I'm going to have to find some other way to clear the stress. It probably didn't help that I only got six hours of sleep tonight, so I'm going to rectify that by going to bed at nine p.m. like an octogenarian.

But the day was kind of aight, I guess; I went in early and grabbed a latte before doing a bit of stuff for my own life, and then slogged through meetings, etc. until five. My team had a bake-off, which I didn't participate in since I was lazy this weekend - and I'm glad I didn't participate, since someone sabotaged the voting, which was annoying but also something I didn't really have the energy to intervene in. And to be fair, the voting process was very ill-defined and ripe for sabotage, but still. There were other, far more annoying things going on, but a bake-off is fairly non-confidential and non-controversial, so I'll just chalk that up as the only upsetting thing that happened and leave you in perpetual suspense about the rest of it.

The drive home took an hour and a half, but I didn't shoot myself, so that was great. Then I went to my favorite French place, which may have been ill-advised since I just wanted to get some work done and instead ended up talking to the manager the whole time. Oops. And now I'm going to go to bed and set the intention of waking up tomorrow without a headache so that I can get shit done and stop being annoyed. Goodnight!

erdy flerdy borg borg borg

I finished the weekend in style, let me tell you. I went to the grocery store relatively early this morning, where I threw money at the problem of tonight's dinner by buying fancy cheeses and jams and wines so that I could hoodwink my guests into thinking I had expended some effort toward the task of entertaining them. Then I went to my favorite mani/pedi place, where I threw money at the problem of trying to look like a real girl instead of a crazed hermit troll. And then, once I looked like a real girl again, I went to the florist and threw money at the problem of trying to make my home look like a home instead of a cave where I hide from sunlight.

sssanyway, after throwing money at a lot of problems, I had a v. late lunch, threw some more money at the problem of not having plaid pants (solved!), and then came home, cleaned my room, folded some laundry, and talked to my parents. And then I prepared for the main event - family dinner to celebrate the launch of my latest book.

Family dinner was the same as always, which meant that it was a special and highly ridiculous evening full of merriment, embarrassment, and general contentment with life. We had a full house (Terry (obvi), Lauren (aka Subz), Nathan, Chandlord (aka Chandlord), John, Jess, and Adit), and the conversation was all v. entertaining (particularly when Nathan, in all seriousness, suggested that I write choose your own adventure romance novels, which left everyone else dying since Adit has been pushing this idea for over four years without Nathan realizing it). Then, to honor (or debase) my book launch, they took turns reading part of one of the sex scenes - this is almost becoming a tradition of sorts, which is v. strange and v. funny. Jess tried an Australian accent (A for Effort), John programmed his section to be read by a Stephen Hawking voice (which will live on in my nightmares forever), Adit critiqued every line as he read it (excruciatingly funny), and Nathan went Swedish Chef on it, which was just bizarre. So, while I was laughing so hard that I was crying, and I might have been crying because hearing a sex scene read out loud makes it all sound weird and uncomfortable, it was all v. funny.

Sadly, though, all things come to an end, and I must sleep so that I can go to work early tomorrow (stupid day job - after tonight, I either want to write Rafe's book immediately or crawl under a rock and hope no one ever reads my sex scenes again (but I think the right answer is Rafe - I happen to like my sex scenes, even if they don't stand up to the Stephen Hawking test)). Goodnight!

you take me by the heart when you take me by the hand

I did no work of any kind at all today, beyond making a to-do list. I am as shocked as you are.

I could probably leave it at that, since all of your heads have exploded from the impossibility of the earlier statement and I have no readers left, but I'll persevere for posterity. I woke up relatively early this morning and went to breakfast at my favorite cafe at 8:45ish, where I wrote the aforementioned to-do lists, wrote in my journal, and lingered over my coffee. But as I was paying, I got a text from Adit asking if I wanted to go on a hike. This is the kind of text that I usually ignore since I usually feel like I have to work, but since I was determined to relax today and knew I could only do it if I was forced to, I said yes. So he and Priyanka (and their friend Blake) picked me up, and we went over the Golden Gate to Mt. Tam to pursue our adventure.

It was a perfectly gorgeous day for this - a bit cool, but not too cool (and certainly not as cool as those of you suffering from polar vortices), and the forest was amazing. We parked and went ~3mi down Steep Ravine trail, which was, unsurprisingly, a trail down a steep ravine from the mountain to the ocean at Stinson Beach. It wasn't ridiculously crazy steep, although there was one point that required climbing down a ladder, but I was perhaps too focused on placing my feet in such a way as to not slip on a wet rock and die that I didn't look up at the redwoods as much as I probably should have. But it was a great outing, and none of us died, so that was a bonus.

When we got near the beach, we parted ways; Adit and Blake ran back up the other half of the trail to retrieve the car (fools, but I'm grateful they did it), while Priyanka and I took a leisurely stroll into Stinson Beach, split a vanilla milkshake, and sat on the beach talking about romance novels and life in general while we waited for our ride. I think we got the better end of the deal. Then we drove home, and I had exactly twenty minutes to shower off the worst of the sand and sweat before getting a massage. The massage was only aight, probably because I require a deep connection with my massage therapist and I knew within seconds that this woman wasn't it.

Yes, this entire post reinforces that I've become entirely too upscale-but-crunchy-California and must be euthanized.

sssanyway, after the massage I came home, showered again, and then dragged Terry to my favorite Greek place, where we befriended the bartender (Marco, whom I'd met before) and ate chicken and drank wine and discussed v. strange recurring nightmares. Then we came home, I finished THE GIRL OF FIRE AND THORNS (also aight), and now I'm going to rest my legs (jawbone says I took 22000 steps today!) and sleep. Goodnight!

i still wake up, i still see your ghost

I stayed up much later than I intended, which typically only happens when I a) read a book or b) go out with Adit. In this case, I chose option a) THE GIRL OF FIRE AND THORNS, which I'm enjoying so far - I'm about two-thirds in, and since I was in the mood for young adult fantasy, it's fitting the bill quite nicely.

It's also fitting the bill quite nicely for relaxing from my totally horrific and annoying week. Today was better in some ways, worse in others; I was able to sleep until sevenish (although I didn't quite accomplish that blessed feat), and I made it into the SF office by nine so that I could have breakfast and get some work done. My only scheduled meeting of the day went better than I expected it to (even if it means more work for me later), and then I spent some time working in the sun on one of the balconies before deciding to meet a coworker for lunch. Not the most satisfying lunch I've ever had, since I would have rather been at home (or at any of my favorite restaurants on Union Street), but I suppose the free bacon was worth it.

Then I came home with intentions to secretly slack off, but as soon as I got here I was pinged for something, which then plunged me into two hours of highly annoying conversations (interspersed with other work, since I couldn't follow up with everyone all at once). By 4ish I was nearly vibrating with anger, and I was just about to throw my laptop out the window and go on a bender when Terry arrived, fresh from NYC. We had agreed to have dinner tonight, which may have been a poor idea on her part given my general rage levels, but she rallied by five and we went to Sabrosa, where tacos and guacamole and margaritas went a long way toward restoring my equilibrium. Then we came home, I contemplated whether to do anything more fun (or at least more suitable for the life of a single person in San Francisco), and instead decided to follow my instincts and read instead.

And that's all. I was supposed to go to Portland this weekend, but I canceled in favor of doing some marketing stuff for Thorington + generally relaxing + maybe trying to get my shit together and get on top of things before I go to Hawaii next weekend. I'm v. glad I decided this - if my blog doesn't sound sufficiently relaxed this weekend, please smack me. Goodnight!

rumors follow everywhere you go

I had a v long day, but it ended well - after training with Alyssa, having a bunch of meetings, and doing some more work, I ultimately met Claudia for sushi at Wayo. It was delicious (albeit slow), and it was great to catch up again (and to know we can now catch up whenever we want!). Then we adjourned to Chandlord's, where we had wine with Vidya and Katrina while failing to help Chandlord pack.

But now I need to sleep even though I left out all the interesting parts - goodnught!

all the bad boys are standing in the shadows

Considering I worked from home today and was able to sleep in, I'm surprisingly tired - but I suppose that's to be expected since I didn't sleep much the night before. My day was mostly boring; I did a couple of meetings from home, worked on some stuff, and had a late lunch down the street at my favorite brunch place. I talked to the owner (Tony) while I was eating, whom I adore; he'd just gotten my newsletter announcing my newest book (I was supremely touched that he'd signed up for it), so he congratulated me for that, and then we talked for half an hour or so. He told me an amazing story about how his father, who was Italian but born in Australia, was deported from Australia along with his family at the start of WWII (when Tony's father would have been around six), and how they had to take a ship to Japan (on an hour's notice), followed by a train across Russia, etc., and it took them almost three months to get back to Italy. Crazytown.

Then I came home, slogged some more, and then snuck out (is it sneaking when no one cares?) to get my hair cut and my brows tinted and waxed so that I look like a real girl again. My stylist ended up curling my hair for me to show me a different way of styling it since she refused point-blank to chop it all off despite me being in the mood for it, and I liked it well enough that I bought a curling iron tonight. Ha. After the salon, I came home long enough to drop my stuff and take a power nap, and then I went to Des Amis and contemplated working but instead wrote in my journal and contemplated never working on anything ever again.

But now I must sleep if I'm to survive tomorrow - goodnight!

if i recover, will you be my comfort

Today was possibly the most brutal day I've had in months. I know it's hard to believe that, and even as I type it I'm not sure it's true. But after going to bed at nine last night like a geriatric, I woke up sometime right after midnight and didn't fall asleep again until at least three. My stomach was aching and my thought were churning, and that combination made for a night in which I got less than five hours of sleep. Ugh.

So, thus feeling not refreshed at all, I got out of bed around 5:40 and made it out the door by 6:15, which meant I made it to campus by 7:15 and had an hour to do work before starting my meetings. I also had time to grab a chicken hash with scrambled eggs, which was divine. Then I slogged through meetings before sneaking out to see Alyssa. She continues to press the nefarious kettlebell agenda, and I continue to secretly enjoy it even when I slam 12kg of weight into my wrists like an idiot.

After that, I went back to work, showered, had a couple of meetings, and then was surprised and delighted when my team brought champagne to celebrate my latest book's release. I was perhaps too tired and emotionally drained (book releases will do that to you, apparently) to fully enjoy the festivities, but champagne always makes things better (see Napoleon's quote: "in victory you deserve champagne, in defeat you need it"). Then I had another meeting before peacing out to drive home, where I took a six p.m. call that got on my last fucking nerve.

But the call ended, as all things that get on my last fucking nerve do. And so I took a ten minute nap, put on some prettier clothes, called an Uber, and met up with Lauren (aka Subz) for dinner at Troya. It was absolutely delish, although I probably would have thought Jack in the Box was absolutely delish if I'd had 2.5 glasses of zinfandel and an awesome conversation with Lauren. But I think the food was actually good, from what I remember of it. And it was so soothing to my heart and soul to hang out with Lauren, since she tends to help me find perspective on all the stupid side job stuff that comes up throughout life.

So that was all good. Then I walked home down the Fillmore steps (which always give me weird vertigo), washed my face, and then wrote this blog. And if you've read this far, you're all caught up - congrats! and goodnight!

it's such a pity, a boy so pretty

Today was ridiculously long - I left by 6:25am and didn't get home until 8:15pm, if that tells you anything. And the slogging was pretty brutal. And I'm far too tired to make sense of anything, or to be coherent, so I'm going to sleep and hope tomorrow is better. Goodnight!

if i ever did that, i think i'd have a heart attack

I know, I know - I said last night that I was going to celebrate, but I spent most of today working. Whatever. I want to get some marketing-type stuff done over the next few days so I can make the book more successful, and today was a good day for it since I didn't have day job stuff to do. So I slogged all morning and into the early afternoon - mostly updating my website, which is woefully out of date, which was an annoying but necessary task. I'm not quite done with the updates, but it's getting there. Unfortunately, I didn't get to all twenty things on my to-do list, but I have high hopes that I can get some of it done if I get to the office early...

...which means I need to go to bed right now. But suffice it to say that I didn't work *that* hard this afternoon/evening - I went to the gym, came home and showered, talked to my parents, and then met up with Kathia (remember her?) for a glass of wine. I hadn't seen her since before I left for Germany, since she was in Italy for most of the last month, and we were overdue for a catch-up. But one glass of wine turned into two glasses of wine and some champagne (mostly thanks to the owner, who kept pouring for us even though we didn't ask for it), and since I forgot to eat after the gym, I was suddenly tipsy and unable to focus on anything other than the fact that they were playing 'Gladiator' with Russell Crowe behind Kathia. Oops. But it was great to see her, and I'm looking forward to being reunited with her.

Now, though, I must sleep if I have any hope of beating traffic tomorrow - goodnight!

take it off now boy

I finally did it...Thorington is out in the wild where he belongs. You can get it now on Amazon or Kobo; the other vendors are taking their sweet time, as per usual, but it should be live everywhere in the next couple of days. I'm really happy with how it turned out, and I am crossing my fingers that it does well now that I've kicked it out of the next. The next couple of days are a stealth release while I wait for it to go live everywhere, and then I need to do some massive promoting next week to make it soar. Or something.

So obviously this was the most exciting thing (pretty much the only thing) that happened today. I woke up before seven and started working straightaway, since I wanted to get through the last pass of changes and tweak all the epubs. I got the changes done and squared away before it was time to shower and meet someone for brunch - one of the romance readers I've hung out with several times at various conferences over the years was in SF this weekend, and so she and her sister and I met up for brunch at Park Chow. It was fun to see her, and I'm glad we got to interact now since I may be cutting back on my travel plans next year and probably won't be at any big fan-focused events for awhile (short story: I'm burned out on travel and don't think I get as much return on the investment of going as it costs me in time and energy).

After that, I came home and slogged straight through to get all the epubs tweaked, upload them to all my ereaders to check the formatting, and then publish them to the various bookstores. I'm pretty efficient at it at this point, so it wasn't a long or difficult task, just vaguely annoying. By the time I was ready to leave the house, it was already live on Amazon, which I suppose my mercenary side is happy about since that's where most of the sales are...

...but then it was time to stop thinking about sales and do the relaxing thing I've been looking forward to for weeks. I had a facial with my favorite aesthetician at my salon downtown, and I got there just in time. So that was a great way to get pampered and relax a little bit after the madness of getting the book out. Then I bought groceries, came home, messed around with book stuff a bit, and then grabbed dinner at Sabrosa. I probably should have rallied and gathered some people to go out, but I'm too tired to celebrate right now, and I have a million promo tasks I want to take care of.

But this time I'm definitely going to celebrate - I learned that lesson the hard way last year, when I failed to celebrate Alex and Prudence at all and then promptly burned out as soon as I tried to start Thorington. So if you see me working all the time and not doing anything fun over the next few weeks, please smack me. Goodnight!

beneath your beautiful

If all goes as planned, I'm going to hit publish on my book tomorrow. I KNOW. That means you might get a six-hour reprieve or so before I start bitching about how hard it is to write Rafe's story, which should really excite you! Or maybe you'll get a six-week reprieve as I go into hardcore social butterfly mode to feed my starving heart and my content-deprived soul, which should really excite you since my blog posts are always better when I actually leave the house like a real human girl.

Today, thought, was a slog with some lovely socializing at the end of it. I woke up at 4:45am, laid in bed until 5:45 trying to pretend to sleep, and then got up and went to work. Leaving the house at 6:30 on a Friday meant I got there at 7:30, which enabled me to meet a coworker for coffee and get v. v. close to finishing the proofreading. I probably would have finished it if I'd been perfectly focused, but it was all good. Then I went to the office, had meetings mostly straight through until 2pm (with a break for more coffee + some v. delicious sushi), and then promptly left the office to avoid the worst traffic. Leaving at 2:30 got me home by 3:30 through some miracle, and so I actually only spent two hours in the car today, which is nearly unheard of in the modern era.

Once here, I did a tiny bit more work, then abandoned my apartment (and the strong smell of paint from the ongoing painting project going on outside) to finish proofreading at Rapha. Since I only had a chapter left when I stopped this morning, that wasn't a very onerous task. And I have to say, even though I don't usually brag, that at the moment I really love this book. It may not quite overtake Nick and Ellie in my affections, but I really love it and think it's great. Or at least I do now - we'll see how I feel in a few days.

After I finished that and started adding the edits to my docs (over the third latte of the day, which probably should have given me a heart attack), I eventually came home, changed, and went out to be social (shocker). Very longtime readers may remember Claudia (aka Claude, aka Santy Claude, aka Claude the Fraude), who was my roommate freshman and sophomore year of college, and with whom I've shared many highs/lows, ups/downs, triumphs/tragedies, shrimp/feet. She has been sprung from jail (aka Yale) and has taken a job in the bay area, and this was our first rendezvous since she moved back last weekend. We had drinks and delish pulled pork tacos at ABV, and it was so great to know that we can now do this whenever we want.

Then we got into a car with some random people (aka Adit and Priyanka) and went to Central Kitchen, which is both delicious and beyond pretentious. Would you like fennel pollen? 'Hen of the woods', which it turns out is a mushroom instead of a wild chicken? Salsify? $300 bottles of wine? In that case, my friend, you've come to the right place. I had previously gone there for a v. romantic dinner with Adit a couple of years ago (editor's note: February 9, 2013, which I had forgotten was the start of a truly epic disaster of a night which somehow detoured through Trick Dog (where I recall Katrina saying my eyes lit up and I was suddenly going big), through a bar where Adit/Vidya/I played Jenga, and ultimately to Adit's house and whisper karaoke at 5am). Central Kitchen is still ridic, and I didn't go big tonight, but it was all delightful.

Katrina ended up joining us late, and John and Jess were theoretically supposed to come, but there wasn't any room at the inn for them, and so they cut their losses and stayed home. However, the company was delightful, particularly when we all pulled out our phones and started messing around with Instagram (well, those of us who've been living in the city and turning into tech assholes pulled out our phones; Claude stared off into space and no doubt wondered why we all suck). Then we all parted ways around 10:30, and now I must sleep so I can publish a book tomorrow. Goodnight!

sleeping is giving in

Today was perhaps the most brutal slog yet. I woke up too early and couldn't go back to sleep, and as it turns out I should have gotten up and left super early - when I left at 6:50 (which is normally fine to get to Palo Alto by 8 on 280), my commute ended up taking an hour and forty fucking minutes, so I missed the first half of my training session :( She still gave me a pretty decent workout despite missing half of it, and she gave me homework for the weekend, so at least I got something out of it.

Then I went to work, showered v. quickly, and slogged for many hours. I had my annual review this morning, which went as they all seem to do (short version: I'm pretty awesome). Then I had a team lunch, which we ate out on a patio, and where my hair was apparently perilously close to some dude's exposed crack (he was sitting at the table behind me, and none of the team saw fit to tell me to lean in (lean in physically, not in the Sheryl Sandberg way)). After, I walked over to another meeting to work, took a thoroughly useless meeting there, adjourned to coffee lab with Dave and Tomas (our triumvirate of fun has continued post-Frankfurt), and then had a team meeting...

...and then I really wanted to go home, but I had one more meeting, and traffic looked so fucking awful again (prediction at 5pm was that it would take an hour and fifty-six minutes to get home) that I just curled up on the couch at work and worked until ~7:30. This was probably the right call since I wrote the performance reviews I have to give tomorrow and sent some important emails, but I really kind of wanted to die.

And now I'm going to go to bed, hope I sleep excessively, and then get up super early so that I can go to work and finish proofreading before starting my day job. Goodnight!

possibility days are impossible

I can't blog - I woke up before five this morning and didn't get home until 10:20, so I'm beyond exhausted. And you can guess what I did anyway...write, work, get coffee, work more, write, have dinner and drinks. Pretty standard, really. I would tell you more, in excruciating detail, but I left my laptops in my trunk, I don't feel like typing on my phone, and I should go to bed anyway. Goodnight!

all i wanna do (bang bang bang bang)

Today was a lovely but brutal slog - I woke up, proofread for an hour (so close to done!), worked, voted, and then drove to the south bay to train with Alyssa. Then I had meetings and work all afternoon - work continues to be mildly to moderately annoying, but I think I'll survive.

But I left (slightly later than I should have) to have a friendship renewal dinner. It was the first time I'd seen Tolu since he had his baby, and it was the first time Jen was able to attend since moving back from NYC, so that was awesome. Joann and Jane were in attendance as well, and we had an awesome time catching up (and Joann gave a stirring rendition of the Gaston song from "Beauty and the Beast", which you probably had to be there for). It's hard to believe I've known them for eleven years, but it's true, and I'm glad the friendship renewal dinner continues.

But now I'm wiped out and need to sleep so I can get up early and work before work (sob) - goodnight!

every time you close your eyes (lies, lies)

No publishing today...I was hijacked by the day job and social activities after, which I suppose is to be expected. I got up at 5:30, made it down to work by 7:45ish, and proofread at coffee lab for an hour before grabbing breakfast and starting my day of meetings and other tasks. This wasn't all horrible, although I had more work than I wanted to do, which meant I actually worked until 5:30 rather than sneaking out and proofreading like I'd hoped. But I got in another working session at coffee lab (even if it was day job stuff, I'll take it), and the weather was lovely and my v. Mediterranean lunch was delish.

So that's all good, I guess. Then I went to Palo Alto for a going-away party for the big boss (remember her?), who is going off to greener pastures at a startup. It was like a mini reunion of all the bigshots from her time there, so I schmoozed with a bunch of directors and VPs (and by that I mean I ignored most of them and caught up with the people I actually know/care about). I also spent some quality time with the big boss's husband, whom I worked with way back in 2007-2008, and it was great to catch up with him. And Alana was there, who is a longtime blog reader, so shout-out to her!

I stayed there until 8:30ish, and then I sped home and did day job stuff for the last hour. And on that boring note, I must sleep; I'm going to prioritize sleep over getting up early, but I would like to proofread for an hour from home before doing work, voting, working out with Alyssa, and going into the office. Goodnight!

hit and run

I'm so fucking close to being able to publish, but I'm going to go to bed so that I don't wreck my week. I might have done it if I hadn't spent two hours this afternoon on day job stuff + two hours hanging out with Terry, but both things were v necessary for my sanity.

But I woke up and was working by sevenish, and I finished and did all the formatting before breaking to shower, have brunch, and do my day job. Then I started proofing the final copy at Fort Mason (where I ran into Can, oddly enough), before adjourning to talk to my parents and do more proofing at nectar. Terry met me there and we discussed life over champagne (yay). Then I came home and proofed until I realized my eyes were going to give out.

All in all I'm happy with what I've got, and the final proof looks really good overall. So I'm planning to finish tomorrow and upload tomorrow night, but that's all dependent on whether the day job continues to thwart me. But I'll have a better chance if I go to bed now - goodnight!

scare your sons scare your daughters

I'm so close to the end - paragraphs, perhaps - but I'm falling asleep in bed and there's no point in carrying on like this when I would be better served by finishing it early in the morning. So that's all you're getting out of me - which is all that's worth repeating, since I worked or played the hermit all day. Goodnight!

this woman is my destiny

I very wisely stayed home today, but even I think I might have been a bit too hermity. In my defense, it was raining for most of the day and I think I might be getting sick, and I had a lot of work to do. But since Terry ordered pizza for lunch and I ordered thai for supper, the only times I left the house were to go downstairs and greet the delivery guys. Oh, and I spent another twenty minutes tearing my car apart looking for the beeper that someone at work put in my car - it's now cleaner than it's been in years since I threw away everything nonessential, but the beeping persists. Lol.

The rest of the day was fine, although I didn't sleep that well last night and so was dragging a bit today. I got some important work done, then procrastinated on other important work by making an entirely unnecessary video to convince my coworkers to vote on the offsite idea that I'd like them to vote on (which may be moot, since I'm the one who's tallying the results, but I'd like to believe that my integrity will result in a democratic outcome rather than the military coup I'm considering). I had intended to write tonight, but I was sick of staring at screens and tired in general, so I reread a Kresley Cole book and dreamed of Paris instead.

And now, sadly, I must sleep if I'm to get anything done tomorrow - goodnight!