Thursday, February 25, 2016

in the darkness i will meet my creators

I have returned to the grind, sort of, for one day and one day only. I wish it were more days - I really don't want to have to go to this conference thing tomorrow, and am tempted to skip it. But I think my current plan is to go late (there's a presentation up first that I've seen several times before), try to write before going, and then attempt to enjoy the afternoon - and if I don't enjoy the afternoon, then maybe I'll be similarly lackadaisical about my Saturday attendance (also, I spelled lackadaisical right on the first try, so if I drank too much last weekend, the wine didn't kill whatever brain cell knew that).

Today, though, I tried to get things done. I was at my laptop by 8:30, and I tried this music program that I'd heard about - brain.fm claims that it will help you to focus like nothing else, although they warn against pregnant women using it, and you're absolutely not supposed to drive while playing it (these are strange warnings to get from a music site). And I have to say it worked - I spent two hours working, without really wanting a break and without really getting distracted. However, then I felt perilously close to tears over ancient wounds this afternoon for no good reason...so maybe when it reworked my brainwaves, it cut through some old scar tissue. Or maybe I'm just a hot mess when I'm writing, which is probably true.

sssanyway. The focus was great, so I'm going to try it again tomorrow. But I had to stop working and go to San Mateo for a writing date, which was probably ill-advised - I learn a lot from that group about publishing and marketing, so it's good to keep the connection, but I have a lot of trouble writing around them. So I wrote a few hundred words, and ate a delicious salad, but it really wasn't what I needed to be doing.

However, I came home, did another hour of work-type stuff, and then walked down to the financial district to have dinner with Jenn, who is the photographer who has done all of my covers. She's in town for the conference I'm going to, so we had tapas at Bask. It was super tasty and I would recommend the food heartily, but the service was fairly bad and so I was thirsty and had to wait forty minutes to get our check at the end. But it was great to catch up with Jenn, so #noregrets (even though I could have seen a movie and done things with 'real' friends tonight, but sometimes business takes precedence).

Then I took a lyft home with a slightly weirder than usual driver, and I did another hour of work. And now I need to sleep, and hope that my brainwaves settle into some sort of productivity-sans-tears pattern - but at this point I'll take productivity no matter what the side effects are. Goodnight!

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