it's the way we sing that makes 'em dream

This chapter of small town life is coming to a close, but another will be opening in about two weeks, so there's nothing to be sad about. Today was mostly productive, if you consider crossword puzzles productive. Ha.

Actually, I really was productive, just not maximally productive. But then, I woke up at eleven a.m. after having dreamed some of the strangest dreams in recent memory (a Helm's Deep-type battle against millions of orcs suddenly turned into my wedding ceremony, which took place in a castle to one of my high school classmates -- not sure whether killing orcs or getting married is more horrifying right now). So, I suppose maximal productivity wasn't in the cards. But I spent a few hours catching up on business stuff, exchanging emails with my agent (nothing noteworthy), sending many emails to the poor woman who took over my volunteer position with my local romance chapter, and otherwise organizing my thoughts about the edits for Nick and Ellie.

I took a break in the late afternoon to run into town and buy some sweet potatoes for my mother (Merry Christmas!), and I ran into one of my old high school classmates - luckily not the one I married in my dream, as that might have been super weird. Instead, I ran into Dusty and his wife Jessica (who was a couple of years behind us), and we caught up for five or ten minutes while blocking a key aisle in the store (I guess when there are only six or seven aisles, they're all key). They seem to be doing well, and we shared whatever info we have on our other classmates (which isn't much, since I only ever talk to Katie and Hannah and Dusty seems to be just as hermity as I am). Then I came home, ate supper with the parents, watched some fine CBS programming, and then came downstairs and went through the whole manuscript again, inserting notes about what I want to change where so that the direction for my revisions is as clear as possible.

And now that you're caught up on my day, I should go to bed; I need to write tomorrow, and I also need to pack, which is not a particularly daunting prospect since I'll be back in two weeks to pick up anything I forget. Goodnight!

so you think you can love me and leave me to die

I read through all of Ellie and Nick's book today. And the verdict: hmm. Most of it is really good, if I'm being honest and not self-loathing. But there are also some rough patches, and some ghosts of plot threads that have since been cut, and some late additions that aren't fully woven into the story. So, I have a lot of work ahead of me - but the end is in sight, and I have an idea of what I need to do to get there.

The rest of the day was v. quiet; I woke up around ten, ate brunch with the fam, and said goodbye to [censored], who had to [censored]. Then I spent the afternoon inadvertently napping before beginning to read. I took a break in the late afternoon to go into town with my father to see my grandmother, and then I continued to break until after supper (leftover roast beef) and tv ("The Good Wife", which I really should watch all the time, since I think it's awesome). And then I came downstairs, finished reading the book, contemplated for awhile, and then wrote a page of notes on what I should work on. And now, I should sleep; I want to finish organizing my thoughts tomorrow, so sleep is necessary. Goodnight!

dream until your dream come true

I printed out Nick and Ellie's book today, so I guess that means it's getting closer to being a real thing! Granted, I have to do a full read-through, and the results of that full read-through will determine whether I can move on to copyedits or whether I need to rewrite the whole thing while weeping and drinking heavily. I suspect the actual result will be somewhere in the middle of that continuum - I know there are some bits I need to fix, and I may need to add a scene or two. But it's getting there, and I think I might be able to be excited about it again...but we shall see.

However, I didn't do the full read-through today - I want to do it with minimal interruptions, which wasn't possible during the day, and by the time I finished watching tv with the parents (I feel very unhip for enjoying 'NCIS' so much) and conversing with [censored], it was ten p.m. I could have stayed up and powered through, but I'm a bit sleepy and need to get up in the morning to bid [censored] adieu, so instead I did a crossword puzzle (again, I'm an octogenarian) and read about the Romantic movement in British art, since one of the unresolved threads is Ellie's painting. Fun, right?

The rest of the day was a hodgepodge of family stuff. I didn't get up until eleven, since I had stayed up too late last night, and when I woke up I discovered that my sister was almost here. So I got dressed without showering and went upstairs to spend some quality time with my sister and my youngest niece. After they left, I formatted my manuscript, printed it, hole punched all of it, and made it into a lovely book. Then I chatted with my mother as she started unearthing all her Christmas decorations (a week-long process, which I expect I will someday mimic, much to my chagrin), and we eventually ate supper (roast beef) before watching some fine CBS programming. And now, I should sleep - I want to do the read-through tomorrow, if I have time, so I should probably get up earlier than eleven a.m. Goodnight!

he ain't heavy, he's my [censored]

Today was v. lovely and v. slothful - which is not good for the book, although I did write a couple of pages tonight to fill in a gap before the final scene. I think I'm close to being ready to print it off and fix everything, which is both good and terrifying, since I don't know how much work fixing it will be. But that's a problem for tomorrow. Today was all about being lazy. I whiled away the morning sleeping/doing nothing, and then spent some time in the afternoon going Black Friday shopping with my mother. We both loathe the thought of going to malls on Black Friday (and she loathes malls at all times; my apparent love of shopping is fickle and has only developed in the last few years, probably a result of my time in India where all we did was shop). So instead we went up to Chariton (~30mins away) and went to two stores to check out the sales. The first store (Pamida, for those of you who care) was recently bought out by someone, who closed the store in our town (boo) and is now selling everything in the Chariton store to make way for their own brands, etc. So, the pickings were slim and fairly dreadful. Then we went to Ben Franklin (another store I've never seen outside southern Iowa), and then we came home, where my mother and [censored] watched the ISU/West Virginia game while I tried my best to ignore it.

Tonight, we ate leftovers (yum) and played most of a game of hearts (which I did not do well at) until [censored]'s bestie came over with his wife. [censored] and friends adjourned to the downstairs couches while my parents and I watched a hideously depressing documentary on the Donner Party on public television. And then I messed around, read more about the Donner Party, said goodbye to [censored]'s friends, and wrote a couple of pages. And now that it's almost three a.m., I should really sleep -- goodnight!

look into my eyes, you can see the flames

Happy Thanksgiving! And apologies for not blogging yesterday - I wrote most of the final scene of Nick and Ellie's book (yay) and was out of words, so I didn't bother. But there was nothing much to report yesterday - I helped my mom with the Thanksgiving preparations, and wrote, and greeted [censored] when he arrived from [censored].

Now that you're all caught up, I shall recount what happened today. I woke up before ten (shocking!), checked in with my mother, and then got in the shower just as Uncle Mark, Aunt Kathy, and Drewbaby arrived. They were followed shortly thereafter by Aunt Becky and Uncle Brian, who brought Gram along with them. And all in all, we had a v. lovely day; Gram has slipped a lot in the last year, which is all rather depressing, but she seems to remember who we all are even if she doesn't remember that she just asked us the question she is now asking again, so I suppose that's something. But it was good to see everyone, and we had a delicious Thanksgiving dinner - my parents are following the low carb gospel, so the meal was less carbariffic than in previous years. We had mashed potatoes and baked sweet potatoes, but we had green beans instead of green bean casserole, and cranberries instead of the cranberry jello salad with two cups of sugar, and my mom made gluten-free pumpkin cheesecake instead of pumpkin pie. But this made it all totally easy for me and my gluten issues, and Aunt Kathy and Aunt Becky brought carb items for those who wanted them, so it was all good.

Post dinner, I didn't fall immediately into a food coma, so I was able to help mom with the dishes and hang out with the family. B&B took Gram home around five and left for Des Moines from there, and Mark/Kathy/Drew left as soon as the best bits of "Inside Edition" were over (a sentence I never thought I would type, since I loathe "Inside Edition", but there was a story of some family who found it impossible to get some squatters out of their house, which would have been interesting had they not been maddeningly vague on details). Then the four of us ate leftovers for supper, and I watched some tv with mom and [censored] before coming downstairs and contemplating the romance novel. And now that I'm done contemplating (and about to fall asleep), I should go to bed - goodnight!

what is left to learn when he would let you crash and burn

Today was my first full day in Iowa, and I used it to oversleep (of course), overcaffeinate (thanks to my coffee grinder arriving at three p.m.), and generally engage in slothful behavior. But I learned a lot about ducks! And I brainstormed a novella (I know, brainstorming yet another book when I have like ten others waiting to be written is stupid), and wrote some of Ellie and Nick, etc.

But really, today was lazy. I woke up at eight, thought that seemed too early, went back to sleep, and woke up again at eleven. Then I hung out with my mom for a couple of hours before showering; my dad had recaulked my shower a couple of days ago, so I used his in an effort to make sure the caulk dries properly, and it was an adventure if only because his shower (which is gigantic and confusing) has jets that would be great for massaging a normal person's back, but for me they just try to massage my face. Not helpful.

Post shower, I made coffee and watched a documentary on ducks with my mom, who was watching it while she ironed (it was not on CBS, which I know shocks you, but she hates Dr. Phil more than she likes CBS, so she was watching PBS instead). Then I went into town to get some soda and ran into my former fifth/sixth grade English teacher (who went to high school with my dad and is the mother of [censored]'s best friend), so we chatted for a bit. Then I came home, worked on my novella idea, ate supper, watched some NCIS and NCIS:LA, and then came downstairs and procrastinated/worked on Nick and Ellie.

And now, I must go to bed - I want to wrap up this draft tomorrow, which is theoretically possible if I don't sleep until noon and get caught up in another documentary (although they advertised one called 'My Life as a Turkey', which looked AWESOME, so no promises that I'll be productive). Goodnight!

that dog won't hunt

I have arrived in Iowa, after a v. long day of traveling that was made longer (in emotion, not duration, since it ate into a layover rather than an arrival time) by the ineptitude of TSA, which had made some sort of error with baggage screening in San Francisco and so held all the planes in our terminal for an hour. This of course caused a traffic jam on the runways when they finally released everyone, so we were an hour and a half late getting into Denver. Boo. But luckily I had closer to three hours in Denver, so that still left me with time to get something to eat and check my online world, etc.

All in all, though, things went smoothly; Terry and I left the apartment at 6:45, as planned, and traffic was v. smooth, also as planned. Security was not as smooth, since it took twenty minutes, but I still had time to grab a latte before boarding my flight (which then sat on the tarmac, as mentioned above). And I made it to Des Moines a few minutes early, where I met my parents, grabbed my bag, and went to Johnny's for a ribeye to celebrate my dad's birthday (which is today!). Of course, we would have gone to Johnny's for a ribeye whether it was his birthday or not, but the fact that it was his birthday made it even better.

Then we came home, and a deer tried to kill us - while coming close to hitting a deer is sort of standard operating procedure for any drive home from Des Moines, this one was the closest I'd been to actually hitting one in a very long time. Not that I would have hit it; my dad was driving, so a) it wouldn't have been my fault if we did and b) he saw it in time to stop, although the tires squealed and we were only a couple of feet from it when we stopped. Fucking deer. Anyway, after that excitement, we made the rest of the drive unscathed, and then my dad and I talked in the kitchen for another hour or so before my parents fell asleep and I came downstairs to unpack my suitcase.

And now, I should sleep; while I can't promise to switch to Iowa time while I'm here, I'm going to try to get a little closer to it (and write a book in the process). Goodnight!

making love out of nothing at all

I must go to bed immediately; I'm leaving for Iowa in the morning, which means I have to get up at some ungodly hour and go to the airport. But, I expect that once I get on the plane I'll be in a lovely mood - I have grand plans to work on zee book and ignore all other distractions (provided there are no children kicking me in the back).

Today was all about preparing for my trip (and being lazy); I slept until 10:30, and then had brunch with Terry. We had mimosas like every other person in this godforsaken neighborhood, and I said goodbye to my beloved huevos rancheros in preparation for my ten days of non-Mexican food. Then we came home and I packed, cleaned my room, cleaned out the fridge, talked to my parents, ran an errand (Sephora!), etc. Then, Terry and I ordered gluten-free pizza for dinner and I totally vegged out in front of the tv as I rarely do - we watched last week's "Once Upon a Time" (I should probably catch up on that show, since I'm missing half of what's going on), a little bit of "Beauty and the Beast" before I revolted, and the first two episodes of "Wedding Band", which I ADORED (to the point that I told Terry I was annoyed when she switched to the AMAs and I discovered that Brian Austin Green wasn't starring in the awards show).

But now, I must sleep - tomorrow I shall be in Iowa! Goodnight!

you can wipe off that grin, i know where you've been...it's all been a pack of lies

I'm super, super sleepy, but I'm also hyped up on McDonald's coffee like a long-haul trucker who was recently scared off of 5-hour Energy by all those reported deaths, so going to sleep may be difficult. I shall endeavor to succeed...but first, my day. I spent the morning taking care of tings, and I also managed to write six pages, which I'll take. I had to leave home around 1:15, though, so that I could drive to Manteca (sorry, [censored]) for the transitional board meeting for my romance chapter. I got there right at three p.m., and ended up staying until a quarter to eleven, which was a little intense. The meeting itself took almost three hours, since the old board (me + the other officers) had to explain to the new board how to do everything. Then we had dinner (baked potato bar!) and talked for another couple of hours. Most people left around 8:30, but I stuck around because I liked the people who stuck around, and the remaining four of us talked about writing and books for another two hours.

So, that was totally fun, but at 10:30 I realized that I was going to have to drive home and try to stay awake for it, so I abruptly left, killing the party in the process. I stopped in Manteca for a McDonald's coffee, since Starbucks was closed, and I nursed it on the long, dark drive back to the evil city. Luckily I was coming in so late that there was absolutely no traffic, so I didn't get stuck for an hour on the bay bridge like I did coming back from this meeting last year. Unluckily, though, it rained most of the way, which made the drive slow and exceedingly unpleasant. But I survived, and now I have no volunteer activities lined up for next year - remind me to stick with this and not suddenly think I have to sign up for something. And now, I must sleep, since I have many tings to do tomorrow in preparation for my trip to Iowa. Goodnight!

we run the night

I didn't do nearly enough writing today, but that's a common refrain. I did do *some* writing, though, so I suppose it could have been worse. And I maintained ties with at least a few friends, so there's that as well. The morning started off on an unusual note; I woke up (not unusual), showered (still not unusual), and then GOT ON A BUS (crazy) and had coffee with Chandlord and Katrina. I know, shit just got real. We went to Hooker's Sweet Treats, which is a ridiculous name for an eating establishment, and I had a latte that was a'ight while catching up with them. When we were done, I was hungry (sweet treats almost inevitably contain gluten), and so Chandlord ordered me to go to Brenda's, which is in the heart of the Tenderloin and serves amazing soul food in a v. New Orleans-ish atmosphere. Upscale New Orleans, for what it's worth, which is odd given the cracked out citizenry lingering just outside the restaurant. But I got a table pretty quickly, and my food was great (although I accidentally got some gluten, since I didn't realize that the oysters in my oyster/bacon/scallion scramble were breaded).

So I did some writing there, finished eating, came home, and wrote some more. Then I took a painted my toenails and took a nap, because I'm industrious like that. Eventually, Terry came home, and we chatted it up before going out for dinner, where we had margaritas and tacos and were generally quite content (and I was even more content than she was because I wasn't seeing BREAKING DAWN - there is a god). When we got home, we watched some tv while I wrote up a best practices doc for the VP of programs role that I'm transitioning out of with my romance chapter - the transition meeting is tomorrow in Manteca, which must be code for Nevada because it's ridiculously far away. And so now I need to go to bed so that I can write before heading off into the wilderness in the morning. Goodnight!

stripping down to dirty socks

I'm falling asleep over my keyboard, which is how blog entry travesties happen, so I'm going to knock this out and go to sleep before I write some ridiculous string of typos that has the potential to give away too much of my inner thought processes.

Today was very productive; it started with some online activity with [censored], and then I eventually made my way to the glorious south bay, where I had a late lunch and worked furiously on Nick and Ellie. This continued until it was time to have coffee with Heather (aka dear respected madam). It turned out that an hour of catching up wasn't enough, so we made plans to meet up again later for dinner. In the meantime, I went to Stanford, where I returned a book and wrote until it was time to meet back up with Heather.

As it turns out, dinner was worth it not just for the company (which was awesome even after she told me she was going to skin me and burrow into my skin - I think she was joking) but because the brainstorming we did helped me to overcome the last thing that I hate about this book. Well, second-to-last thing; last thing is that it's not finished, but after writing eighteen pages tonight and figuring out my biggest plot issues, it's a lot closer than it was. When I got home at around 10:30, I continued to write...but now, as I said, I'm falling asleep and it's time to be done with you, with Nick and Ellie, and with everything else. Goodnight!

black hole sun

I don't really want to get into how the writing went today; suffice it to say that my stomach hurts and I'm generally annoyed. But I did leave the house for a bit to get my bangs trimmed and my eyebrows waxed, which will be wasted since I don't intend to leave the house again. I had intended to eat a late lunch at Samovar and write there, but there was some big event going on at the Moscone Center, so my plan was thwarted. Instead, I had lunch at the mall food court, then came home, considered my story, and instead cleaned my linen closet. I'm running out of things in my room to reorganize, though, so I think tomorrow I will have to make progress or die trying.

And now I'm going to go to sleep, and attempt to be a bit more mindful tomorrow about staying in the story rather than letting myself anesthetize all the fear (which is the real root cause of my writer's block) by wasting time cleaning or messing around on the internet. Goodnight!

we'll go dreaming

I'm out of words...I'm making progress with Nick and Ellie, but every step is slow and painful, and I need to go to bed so that I can get focused on them again tomorrow. Since I didn't leave the house, there's really nothing else to share, right? So, please accept my apologies, and I will do my best to be more interesting tomorrow. Goodnight!

my heart has started to separate

I have nothing of interest or import to share - today was all about getting everything unpacked, organized, taken care of, etc., so that I can focus for the next few days before packing again and going to Iowa for Thanksgiving (aka tanksgiving). I spent the morning at Morning Due, where I dutifully typed ~3500 words that I'd written in my notebook since the last time I typed up my manuscript pages. Then I got some groceries, came home, and spent the afternoon making steady but substantial progress through all the piles of paper, receipts, research materials, and other random accumulations of stuff that had taken over my room - it now feels like someplace that I can write in again, rather than something I must avert my eyes from, so that's a good thing.

Finally, though, it was time to take a break, so I made some chili. While I was cooking, Terry came home, and we talked briefly before she went out for dinner and I sat down to eat my chili alone like the sad little hermit I am (j/k - I'm actually in an excellent mood; the hermit thing might be accurate). I worked for a couple of hours after that, and then Terry came home and we watched "Bones" while I messed around on the internet some more. And now, I should sleep; I'm slowly canceling all my plans this week so that I can stay focused on zee writing, although Terry tricked me into seeing "Breaking Dawn" on Friday (clearly I need to accidentally scratch my corneas or something between now and then). Goodnight!

a beauty and the beat

I am embarrassed with myself for quoting a Bieber song in the title, but we'll all just have to deal with it. I have successfully returned to San Francisco, after a v. long day of continuing to be my alter ego, followed by reverting swiftly to my real identity so that I could spend some time with an old boss, followed by sitting in DFW airport and talking to strangers because my flight was delayed.

But first things first...I actually made it to breakfast on time this morning, and discovered that Sarah MacLean and Eloisa James were sitting at my table, which was super fun and surprising. The breakfast itself was utterly ridiculous for reasons that I won't go into in a semi-public forum (okay, one reason: the author who hosted the entire breakfast did a Q&A that ended up revolving around her own sex life, which made me incredibly uncomfortable). But I had an awesome time at the conference, and I'm invited back for next year, so I'll have to figure out my conference schedule and see whether it makes sense to go again or try somewhere new.

Post conference, I finished packing, then drove to another side of Dallas to hang out with Laura for a few hours. She was a director in my group way back in 2007/2008 (the one who was really into crafting), but her family lives in Dallas (although she's now working in San Antonio and going back to Dallas on the weekends). It was so great to see her and get to catch up, since it had been over a year since I had seen her; she seems to be doing well, and her son is applying to colleges, which is hard to believe. They sent me on my way around 4:30, and I successfully got to DFW, returned my rental car, got to the airport...and discovered my flight was delayed by an hour. Boo. So I had enchiladas and a couple of margaritas at a cantina type place in the airport, where I befriended a guy in the oil industry who was flying back to Alaska tonight. Then I grabbed a latte, talked to my parents for awhile, and then had a v. uneventful flight back to San Francisco. And now, alas, I should sleep; I know I say this every day, but tomorrow really does need to be all about the writing. Goodnight!

maybe i'm just in love when you wake me up

I'm super tired, but I had an awesome day at this conference despite the fact that it's two hours ahead of California and I believe we've already established (exhibit: everything) that I'm not a morning person. But I had a v. enjoyable day despite that, and I even wrote a page of Nick and Ellie's story, which was unexpected but v. welcome. I had to hang out in the 'author lounge' for an hour in the morning, where I sat at a table with other readers and writers and discussed books, which is always fun. Then I had lunch at a table with some v. fun writers; the conference served tex-mex, which as far as I can tell just means that everything is smothered in cheese (change we can all get behind). Eloisa James was the featured author, but she did a q&a instead of a keynote, which was great to hear.

After lunch, I hid in my room for a bit because I needed a break, but then I had a panel with Sarah MacLean (love her!) and Connie Cox (a contemporary writer whom I've never read, but that's not surprising since I don't really read contemporary). It was all about naming characters, a topic I didn't really have enough thoughts on to fill an entire hour, but the attendees seemed to enjoy it anyway. After the panel, Sarah and I walked down the street to Starbucks, then came back to the hotel and wrote (and talked) in the lobby until it was time for the book signing. I actually sold a few books to people, and had a couple of people come up to me and say that they'd read and loved my books already, which was kind of squee-worthy - it's still incredibly bizarre to have that happen, and I don't know how to handle it (or how to sign my name, since ending a signature with a 'y' is so different than ending with an 'r'). But even though I'm a baby author compared to a lot of the people here, it all feels more real at events like this - so that was fun.

Post-signing, I freshened up and then went out to dinner with Sarah, Eloisa James, Lauren Willig, and four readers we invited to come along with us. Sarah had invited me to this dinner, and told me to bring a reader, so I snagged one of the women I sat with last night, and we all had a fabulous time over more tex-mex (chicken enchiladas smothered in shredded cheese and cheese sauce for me, plus appetizers for the table that involved smothered french fries and smothered nachos). We made it back to the hotel just in time for the bachelor auction (ridic) and costume contest (also ridic), where I hung out with some new writer friends and was incredibly entertained by a major historical romance writer who is probably my mom's age and yet knew all the words and some awesome dance moves to apply to the seminal Lil Jon/LMFAO song "Shots". And now I'm suddenly out of energy, and I have to get up earlier than I had planned tomorrow because it turns out my attendance is required at breakfast, which is a travesty that I will disallow if I ever become a big enough deal to dictate my schedule at these things. A girl can dream. Goodnight!

girl, you really got me now, you got me so i don't know what i'm doin'

First, can I say that I wish writing a romance novel was as easy as writing the lyrics to "You Really Got Me" by Van Halen. I mean, even "Jump" is a lyrical masterpiece compared to that. If only I could repeat a chapter or two over and over again and sell it as a finished book...but alas, I cannot.

sssanyway, I'm still in Dallas, and I accomplished everything I set out to do today (other than finishing my book, which ain't happening this weekend). I got some sleep, checked in with the people for the conference and dropped off a bunch of those #&@%ing excerpt booklets that have been the bane of my existence for the past four months so that they could put them in the goody bags for the conference attendees, and then had lunch at an awesome French bistro nearby that one of the conference coordinators recommended to me. Their roast chicken was great, as were the fries, and I drafted a bit of the next scene of zee romance novel while drinking diet coke and enjoying life.

After lunch, I enjoyed life a little too hard by going across the street to Anthropologie and buying an utterly ridiculous coat that I should probably take back (but I know I won't, because it's the most awesome thing I've ever worn). Then I went to the gift store next to it and bought scented votives and a basket and some organza bags for the favors I'm giving out at my luncheon table tomorrow, and then I went to the fancy grocery store in the same shopping center to get tea and hot chocolate for the same basket. My basket ended up super cute - a copy of each of my books, the tea/hot chocolate, and the votives/candleholders. Yes, this is my life now.

I spent the rest of the afternoon working, but I rallied in time to go to the welcome reception/dinner/general hangout, where I sat with a fun table of people and ended up eating pizza that I shouldn't have eaten because I wasn't hungry enough to eat dinner at five p.m. and then thing unexpectedly went until ten p.m. rather than ending at 7:30 like I had expected. Still, it was fun, and I'm excited for tomorrow. Speaking of tomorrow, though, I should really sleep so that I can wake up in time to blowdry my hair - this is Texas, after all, and I'm not sure I'm allowed to show my face in public with wet hair. Goodnight!

it's not a homeless life for me

I have arrived in Dallas, where I shall spend the next couple of days being Sara Ramsey. Luckily, I remembered my alter ego when I ran into some bloggers in the elevator and had to introduce myself - they said I looked familiar and recognized my name immediately, and when they said which blog they write for I knew who they were, so that was kind of fun. I'm by no means famous, but it's totally crazy to run into people who have read my stuff, so I'm feeling good about life (even if I need to work on Nick and Ellie in every free moment this weekend).

Anyway, my trip was uneventful, albeit annoying; traffic was bad on the way to the airport and the security line was longer than usual, so instead of having all sorts of extra time to eat breakfast, I had just enough time to get a coffee and a takeout container of scrambled eggs before they were calling final boarding. But my flight was only half full, so there was an empty seat between me and the window guy, which was v. conducive to getting some work done. I got to Dallas around 4pm, retrieved my bags (protip: two suitcases full of books are pretty heavy), and took the shuttle to the rental car location...which must be on the Rio Grande or some shit, because it took like half an hour to get there. Then I drove through rush hour (not advised) to my hotel, which is lovely - it's amazing how big the rooms in a Hilton Garden Inn can be when it's Texas instead of the Bay Area.

By the time I dragged my stuff upstairs and sent a couple of emails, I realized that the only things I'd eaten during the day were those scrambled eggs and some Fritos, so I was suddenly ravenous. I used Yelp and found a Mexican restaurant nearby, which was totally delicious - I love seeing how different 'Mexican' food is in different parts of the country, and this was certainly different than the bay area. Their salsas were tasty, although I didn't care for the avocado/sour cream one (odd, since I'm all about sour cream). And both enchiladas were good; the salsa verde one was a little bit more vinegary than the salsa verde I usually get at Fiesta del Mar, but the sour cream sauce on the second enchilada was something that I could have eaten forever. After becoming stuffed just as rapidly as I had become ravenous earlier, I came back to the hotel, hung up all my clothes, took care of some tings (not to be confused with things) online, and am now going to go to bed at the ridiculously early hour of 10:30pm (8:30pm on the west coast) to try to make up last night's sleep deficit before the conference starts. Goodnight!

the king of wishful thinking

I have to say that I am not excited about getting on a plane tomorrow - perhaps I would be, but given that I have barely recovered from Lauren and Nathan's wedding, I'm not super psyched about spending a second weekend in hyped up extrovert mode. And yet I find that I must do exactly that; I think this reader conference will be really good, both because I will meet other readers and because I hope to spend some time hanging out with other authors. Still, given that I'm behind on Nick and Ellie, I want to spend a weekend talking to people about as much as I want to stab myself in the face with a butter knife.

But, c'est la vie. I'm all packed up and ready to go, with two suitcases (mostly full of books) and grand plans to write on the plane. The suitcases are so full of books that I could have easily done just a carry-on if I didn't have any books, but this is the life of a traveling writer/salesman. Beyond the packing, the rest of my day was good; I took care of stuff around the house this morning and spent the afternoon running errands (including returning the shoes I had planned to wear at Lauren's wedding and promptly blowing the refund on unmentionables). When I got home, Terry was already here, and so we watched 'The Daily Show' and discussed life while she forced me to ice the knee that I mysteriously injured at the wedding. And now, alas, I should sleep. My flight is at 10:30am, which is positively civilized compared to 5:30am, but since I have to drive to the airport during rush hour, I should probably get some sleep so I can get up early. Goodnight!

everybody's looking for something

I need to go to bed immediately; unusually for me, I spent the entire afternoon/evening/night on the couch watching tv (election coverage), and since I accomplished nothing today other than voting, I must get up earlyish so I can accomplish a lot tomorrow. So, no profound comments from me tonight (are there ever?) - goodnight!

love can mend your life but love can break your heart

I was utterly useless today, which I think I needed - clearly I needed it, since I don't feel any of the usual crushing guilt over the fact that I got nothing done. Terry needed a ride to pick up her car from the mechanic this morning, so I got up at 7:30 to take her, and then stopped at Whole Foods on the way back (I have never been in that place at 8am - it was v. strange) to get some groceries so that I can sustain myself for the next couple of days. But when I got home, I promptly went back to bed, and I slept/dosed/daydreamed/messed around online until almost noon. Then I made breakfast/lunch, considered working, and instead did absolutely nothing.

But I did do one thing - I went out for a drink with Katrina and Chandlord, since they had left the wedding before the afterparty on Saturday and weren't able to make it to brunch yesterday since they needed to get back to the city. I was excited to see them, but I was even more excited that the bar had free hot dogs, and I ate two of them (sans bun, which meant I had to hold the hot dogs with a napkin). Yum. And I suppose my friends were good too. Then I came home, watched a bit of tv with Terry, tired of watching tv, and came upstairs to mess around some more and unpack my suitcase so that I can pack it for Dallas. And now, hopefully, the last brooding remnants of my hangover are gone and I can get a lot of stuff done tomorrow. Goodnight!

don't masquerade with the guy in shades, oh no

The wedding yesterday was fabulous...my hangover today was not so fabulous. Thank goodness for the end of daylight saving time - while I'm sad that I won't see my sun friend as much for the next few months, the extra hour this morning saved my life.

I was actually doing surprisingly well this morning. I woke up around eight and decided to eat something in hopes of settling my stomach, so I had eggs with John and Jess in the game room. The game room was last night's scene of the crime - I had organized an impromptu afterparty for a few people after the reception, with the help of the wedding coordinator, who I had befriended earlier and who was more than happy to help me procure alcohol and cabs for people, etc. But by the time we had breakfast, some magical persons had cleaned everything up as though nothing improper had ever happened there. The scrapes on my arms and legs tell a different story (one in which someone, at some point, tossed me into a bush). Still, the whole wedding day was awesome, and well worth the hangover I had already planned to have today.

However, while I was still feeling quite chipper this morning, my usual hangover trend happened, and by the time I loaded my car and reached town for brunch, I had reached the bitter, regret-filled hatred portion of my hangover. Terry knows this part of my hangover well, since it's when I usually stomp around looking for coffee before muttering something mean-spirited and retreating to my room until I'm more fit to be seen. It hit with a particular vengeance this morning - I'm reminded that I'm becoming more of an introvert as I age, since I really enjoy hanging out and having fun, but it costs me more energy than I get from it, and after 60+ hours of nonstop wedding socializing, by this morning I was all tapped out. And it probably didn't help that when we got to brunch, there were more people there than they anticipated, so we were going to have to wait ages for a table...

...so a few of us (John, Jess, Anthony, Dormain, and two people whose names I never bothered to verify, since I was beyond caring, but the guy had very, very nice teeth) hatched a plan, said goodbye to the appropriate people, and went across the street to a lovely French restaurant, where we had a fantastic lunch on their beautiful patio. I ordered a 14oz ribeye with fries, since I realized I barely ate yesterday and meat tends to cure what ails me better than just about anything else (and it was one of the only things on the menu that was gluten free). John seemed to be in about the same mood as I was, so we sat at one end of the table being surly while the guy with the nice teeth and the girl told their life stories, which I mostly ignored. At some point, Dan (a dude I attempted to befriend at the wedding, although he may have been scared off by discussions of sperm whales) showed up, since he saw us as he was headed back to his car from the official brunch, so he hung out for a bit and I foisted some wine and beer on him from the stash that the wedding coordinator had put in my trunk. And then I bid an insincere goodbye to my friends (nice teeth dude had disappeared at this point, so it was less insincere than it could have been), got in my car, and had three hours of blessed solitude while I drove back to the evil city.

I had to make a stop at Lauren and Nathan's house as soon as I got into town, since the wedding presents, a few decorations, the unopened alcohol, and the cake topper had been foisted upon me. I would have waited until tomorrow, but the cake needed to go in the freezer, so I hauled stuff into their house and then finally made it home around 4pm. Upon arriving here, Terry took one look at my face and knew what stage I had reached in my hangover (still bitter, more regret, less hatred, better able to verbalize but still likely to say mean things) and helped me carry the rest of the stuff up from my car. Then I talked to my parents (who probably think I had an awful time at the wedding - they should have talked to me yesterday, when I was all happy and weepy at the wedding and then excited and eager to have fun at the reception), and then Terry ordered pizza and we debriefed on all the wedding action and watched some tv. And now I really, really, really need to sleep - I'm no longer bitter or particularly regret-filled, but I will be if I don't sleep tonight. Goodnight!

it's a nice day for a white wedding

Lauren and Nathan are married! Really, that's all the detail you need. I am beyond thrilled for them, and had such an awesome day getting ready and celebrating with them. Actually, I woke up at five a.m. because I was so excited (or hungover, not clear), and I didnt really sleep after that. Oops. Anyway, I had a lovely time getting ready - I'm low maintenance, but compared to the other bridesmaids I'm like a makeup addict, so the hair and makeup artists had fun with me. Beyond that, I'm so happy that I got to hang out with Lauren while she prepared - it was so awesome, and she looked beautiful. And when she started to panic five minutes before the ceremony and all the new mothers on her bridal party (since all the bridesmaids other than me had babies under a year old) were just panicking as well, I calmly did what I'm trained to do - I found a bottle of tequila and some limes, and Lauren, her sister, and I had small shots before progressing to the future.

Anyway, the wedding was beyond awesome. The tables were gorgeous, the food was wonderful, and I got to sit by the people who have my love and yet spurn it (aka Vidya and kafria$. And the reception and band were awesome, and I had a small afterparty that resulted in jessica getting body checked, but that's the price you pay, rights? nd now I have to vote - good luck!

[editors note from the next morning: I never go back and fix typos, so I will let the last paragraph go unchanged despite it being a trainwreck, but in my defense I was typing on my iPad while falling asleep, and it autocorrected me in some strange ways. Not really sure how Katrina became kafria$, but maybe I'll start calling her that all the time]

but i won't stop until that boy is mine

I need to go to bed right now - I need to get up in eight hours to get ready for this wedding that I'm in (have you heard about it?), so sleep is vital if I'm going to look great in the photos without presenting too much of a challenge to the makeup artist (although if she's an artiste, she's surely up for it). Today was a lovely celebration of Lauren and Nathan (mostly Lauren) - I hung out with Lauren this morning and made her some eggs using whatever I scrounged up in her kitchen, and then we went down to Carmel-by-the-Sea (see previous post) for a lunch hosted by her grandmother (whom they all call Beauty) for the bridesmaids and immediate female relatives. It was totally lovely, and the food was to die for, which seems to be a theme at this wedding.

Post lunch, Lauren, Devon (her twin), and I went for manis and pedis before heading back to the ranch (which sounds waaaaay more rustic than it is) for rehearsal. After we were properly rehearsed, we went into Carmel Valley (see previous post) for the rehearsal dinner, which was v fitting with the vibe for this weekend - a fabulously gorgeous venue and a casual but delicious food offering. They had a taco truck (which doesn't do justice to how delicious the tacos were - I should have had ten of them), and the brought out hot chocolate and churros to finish it off. And my toast went quite well, if I do say so myself - I achieved the optimal alcohol:coherency ratio and was able to say what I wanted to say, so yay.

Post dinner, we adjourned to a wine tasting room across the street for welcome reception for everyone who was already in town, where I reunited with Terry after a v traumatic 32 hours apart. And I continued my quest to meet everyone at the wedding - I should have gotten them to stamp a card for me or something. We shut the place down (sorry, liver, and sorry face, which has to try to not look puffy in the photos tomorrow) at 10:30ish, and then John, Jess, and I played dice in the game room at the ranch (again, not rustic) and caught up since I've been a total hermit for days (weeks, months). But now, sleep. And tomorrow, if all goes well, Lauren and Nathan will get married - and, since I introduced them, they will owe me forever. Yay to indebtedness! Goodnight!

show me a garden that's bursting into life

I am in Carmel Valley, which is not to be confused with Carmel-by-the-Sea for reasons that should be obvious to anyone with a moderate grasp of the English language. I spent the morning getting ready and eating a subpar breakfast, but I left all of that behind me and drove down here this afternoon, with a brief but crucial stop in Gilroy to procure clear deodorant and a venti-sized vat of caffeine.

Properly fueled, I made it down to Carmel Valley around 3:45 and checked into my room, which is gorgeous and close as one can possibly be to the wedding venue (the ceremony is approximately a thirty second walk from my door). I hung out and made some notes about Nick and Ellie from the musings I mused on the way down, and then hung out with Lauren's mom and sister while waiting for Lauren and Nathan to come back from their massage. Suffice it to say that the venue is gorgeous, the wedding party is entertaining, and I think this is going to be a super fun break from my recent hermitville.

But the fun started tonight with a dinner for Lauren and Nathan's families to meet each other - or perhaps it was for them to meet me, since I was the only person there who both a) wasn't related to anyone else in attendance and b) didn't work at the restaurant. But it was really fun to meet all of them - and there were a lot of them, since Nathan's mom came from a family of ten and Lauren's parents have several siblings each (and Lauren has three siblings as well; Nathan's sisters weren't in town yet). I sat right in the thick of the action, across from Lauren and her siblings and next to her dad, who I think I could have gotten well and truly sloshed with had I not (prudently) volunteered to drive. I say prudently because I can't turn down free wine unless I'm driving, but I had already sternly warned myself to save my epic hangover for Sunday morning, since I have responsibilities tomorrow and can't look obviously hungover in the wedding photos on Saturday. I have so much restraint, I know.

sssanyway, the families are lovely, and since it takes me several rounds of meeting people before I remember their names, I'm glad I got some practice tonight. And now I really need to sleep - it seems like everyone in the world gets up earlier than I do these days, so I can't loaf around in my pajamas until noon tomorrow. Life is hard. Goodnight!

i can feel it coming in the air tonight

Must go to bed...I'm leaving for Carmel sometime tomorrow, which means that I need to get up in the morning and get dressed sometime before six p.m. (which may or may not be when I showered today...although since I put on new sweatpants after showering, I'm not really sure what that grooming accomplished). But I did everything today that I needed to do: write ten pages and pack my suitcase. And I had dinner with Terry, which was lovely. And I did several New York Times crosswords, which is my latest procrastinatory addiction (I've taken a break from my newfound love of knitting).

And...that's all. Sorry, I'm boring. But this weekend promises to be less boring, if only because I will have some alcohol and that always brings out the best in my blogging. That's a depressing thought, and I hope it's not actually true. But we shall find out this weekend - for now, it's time for bed!

i seen the lights go down on broadway

Sorry for missing last night - I had nothing to report. I don't really have anything to report today either, but I figured my mother would be v. sad if I didn't blog, so I shall come up with something. I spent the morning reading about the hurricane/superstorm and cleaning up the kitchen, and then I drove down to the glorious south bay to have lunch with Alyssa (remember her?). I'm not planning to start training with her again anytime soon, since I don't particularly enjoy driving down south three times a week to be tortured and then parted with my money, but I found myself missing her and so we got together for lunch instead. She seemed to be in good form, and it was good to catch up, so yay to that.

After Alyssa, I wrote for a couple of hours, then returned to the man to have coffee with a friend who recently started working for the Play team on the ebook offerings. Naturally, I had many, many opinions, so I perhaps overwhelmed him, but it was good to see him and I do like rambling about my pet passions, so that was fun. Then I went to Stanford library and spent a few hours pouring over books and maps and other tings. And now I should sleep - much writing needs to happen tomorrow if I am to go to Carmel without feeling guilty. Goodnight!

i was alone, staring over the ledge, trying my best not to forget

No words left...I woke up at Heather and Salim's, had dim sum with them (ill advised, since I'm allergic to it), sat in their backyard for a bit, contemplated going to Stanford library, and instead came home. And while I was home, I got caught up in stories - both my Regency story, which is destroying me, and my super secret non-gargoyle young adult project, which is clamoring to be written (probably because I shouldn't be thinking about it right now). So, I played the hermit, refusing dinner invitations and possible fun times to stay focused on all the words buzzing inside my head.

And now that you've wrung that many words out of me, I need to go to sleep - tomorrow I must get all those words out of my head and onto the page. Goodnight!

it's just I'm home less than I like to be

I'm typing on my iPad, so this will be brief - I woke up, did stuff around the house, ate some leftover moussaka, and then drove to Stanford to work at the library for a few hours. I didnt write as much as I intended, but I wrote several pages about the endgame plot and my have figured it out, so I'll take it. Then I met up with Terry and a friend of hers for some fiesta - they waited to go in until I showed up, since the waitstaff inexplicably loves me and brings us free guacamole even though I'm far from a regular.

And now I'm spending the night at heather and salim's - a planned sleepover, not a tequila-induced one like last time. I plan to have breakfast with them, and then go back to Stanford and write - wish me luck!

crazy train

No words left...I wrote quite a bit (and had a big breakthrough related to that secondary character I was doubting last night), then made moussaka, which was a two-hour endeavor to rid myself of some extra eggplant/hamburger/milk. The moussaka was successful, although I think I didn't love it because I spent so long making it that it was rather anticlimactic to eat it. And I watched the second game of the World Series, and played on my ipad, and talked to Terry. And now that I've exerted myself far too much on this blog post, it's time for bed - goodnight!

you can't carry it with you if you want to survive

True to my prediction, I didn't feel so hot this morning, and so I only managed to write a couple of pages over a medicinal dose of huevos rancheros at the cafe down the street. I had to throw in the towel early because I had an appointment for an afternoon of pampering to make me look more like a girl and less like a troll for Lauren's wedding next week. My old hair stylist is dead to me (or, not dead, but rather has moved to Minnesota, and it took me several months to come to terms with my loss and decide to seek out someone else), but I found a new stylist at her old salon who gave me a great haircut and an even awesomer blowout, so that's nice. And I got my eyebrows tinted and waxed by the eyebrow goddess there, and I also got a facial from her since I hadn't had a facial in months and months. And now my skin is fresh, my hair is pretty, and my eyebrows don't look like my grandfather's, so I think I'm ready for wedding pictures.

After all that, I went to the mall to buy shoes for the wedding, and I settled on a pair of nude pumps that I've been coveting for awhile anyway and had no reason to buy before because I am mostly barefoot these days. Then I grabbed an early supper at the mall, came home, and watched the first game of the World Series - and it will shock you to know that I turned it on on my own, without even waiting for Terry to get home. Amazing. After that, I got nothing done, but that's okay - tomorrow is a better day, and I need to sleep on the story anyway since a random new character showed up (or is about to show up - she's standing in the doorway of the room where Nick and Ellie are) and I need to decide who she is, what she wants, what she looks like, and whether she's even necessary or whether my imagination is spitting out random secondary characters who should stay buried in my brain for another day. Goodnight!

leave all your love and your loving behind

I'm in a much better mood than I was last night at this point. Also, I'm drunk. I would like to pretend that that's correlation, not causation, but I'm not sure I can tell you that with a straight face.

But first, the beginning. I woke up this morning and succeeded in not obsessing over the internets, thanks to my sim card being in my v. old-school dumbphone that I got in Singapore three years ago - I can receive calls and texts just fine, but I can't check my email or my goodreads reviews or my amazon sales stats on it, so that's an automatic win in terms of preserving my peace of mind. So I got up, took a shower, went downstairs, made myself some delish eggs (scrambled eggs with onions, andouille sausage, and cheese) and some coffee, and enjoyed my breakfast while reading my hometown paper from last week (highlights: they misspelled 'crowd' in a headline on the front page, and there was a pic of a woman spinning wool *directly from* her angora rabbit). Then I stewed over my book, and eventually walked up to the Peet's at Bush and Van Ness, where I wrote four pages or so while waiting for my car to be finished.

The car was done around 4pm, which was two hours later than I had planned, which put me behing on my dinner preparations. I'm over how much I spent on it; it wasn't the money that bothered me as much as not being an expert at all things and so not knowing whether this was something that was truly necessary vs. somewhat necessary vs. a total ripoff. You all know that I like to be right about everything, so this reaction will not surprise you. sssanyway, after the dealership, I went to Whole Foods to get some groceries, and then I came home and embarked on a v. fast death march towards dinner. I was hosting book club tonight, and I was making only things I've never made before, so that added to the stress...

...but it all turned out wonderfully. I bought the appetizers (guac and hummus), but the entree was a roasted eggplant and garlic soup that was *amazing*, if I do say so myself. It was amazing enough anyway because it is both gluten free and dairy free, which is v. hard to find in the "tasty" category of entrees. But the taste was lovely; it required roasting the eggplant, onion, carrot, and celery first (as well as roasting the garlic in a separate pouch), then combining it with broth, potato, tahini, garbanzo beans (aka chickpeas), salt, pepper, and lemon juice, and then pureeing it with my immersion blender. It came out seeming v. fancy and delicious, but it was quite easy to prepare - I would totally make it again. And I plan to try some of the other soups in the cookbook; my parents gave me this Culinary Institute of America Book of Soups for Christmas (at my behest) one year, but I was kind of daunted by the recipes...and now I am no longer daunted, so if you're reading this, perhaps someday you'll benefit!

I also made a gluten free apple crisp, using my Gram's recipe but substituting a speciality gluten-free flour mix for the regular mix, and it turned out perfectly. And we drank two bottles of wine (or rather, we split two bottles of wine, of which I had approximately 3/4s of a bottle myself since most people had to drive). And we discussed TURN OF MIND, which was mostly a discussion of how sad all of us were about the people we knew who had dementia, but it seemed the everyone really 'enjoyed' the book (if 'enjoyed' is the right word, which it's not entirely). And now I must really sleep, since I am sure I'm going to be hung over in the morning and I need to recover just enough to go get my brows waxed (and tinted, since they're going white, ugh) and my hair cut, and go to the mall to get shoes for Lauren's wedding. Goodnight!

the worst things in life come free to us

I'm kind of unbearably sad tonight...I would claim that I don't know the cause of it, but I'm pretty sure it's a combination of spending $3500 to fix my car and reading a novel with a main character who is succumbing to dementia. The car was unexpected because I took it in for a checkup (which it, admittedly, desperately needed, since I get the oil changed regularly but pretty much ignore all other routine maintenance) and they told me they had to replace the power steering rack or some shit. Boo. The book was more expected, since I chose to read it, but it really put me in the worst mood ever....

...and I suppose the reason it put me in the worst mood ever is obvious, since both my grandmothers and one of my great-grandmothers had some pretty serious dementia. Gram Wampler is still alive, but has slipped quite a bit, while Gram Holder passed away in 2004 and my Great-grandma Wampler died while we were in Ukraine, at which point she hadn't been able to speak for years. Tragic.

The book, TURN OF MIND, is really, really good, though; it was written by one of my creative writing teachers at Stanford, and she did a masterful job of capturing the decline in cognitive function and language ability and social skills and all the rest. The narrator is first-person for the most part, told from the perspective of a former orthopedic surgeon who is sliding into dementia and is also suspected of killing her best friend (although she can't remember whether she did or not). And I'm really glad to have read it, but I think it's going to haunt me. And it will probably haunt me because I saw too much of myself in the other characters, who slowly slip away from the main character because they have their own lives and can't stomach having the same fucking conversation over and over and over again, knowing she'll never remember it.

I don't really know what I'm trying to say here. I suppose it will haunt me because it made me think about what my feelings for my grandmothers tell me about who I am, and I'm not sure I like the answer. Is the impatience I feel toward them just my standard defense mechanism, where I've pre-grieved for them years before they're ever gone because it's easier for me to pretend that they're already dead and nothing but a memory? Or is that impatience something colder, more selfish -- a frozen heart, rather than one that can't handle the heat of its emotions? I suspect that my heart is a blocked, simmering volcano, not a frozen wasteland -- but that's probably why I'm struggling with Ellie and Nick right now, since I'm having trouble forcing myself to stay still and listen to all the long-buried emotions that I'm bleeding into their story, when all I want to do is burn everything and move to Thailand and forget that I ever wanted to be a writer, forget that I ever felt anything for anyone, and live in a moment where there are no choices and no divergent paths and no alternate lives that may or may not have been happier than the one I've found myself in.

Sorry, I should have posted a melodrama alert at the beginning. Tomorrow will be better, or at least cheaper, and I will hopefully drag myself out of this black mood (or at least channel it into the end of Nick and Ellie's story, which is fast approaching and would be approaching even faster if I could stop being sad about them). Goodnight!

can't you see what you've done to my heart and soul

The rain is coming down in San Francisco, thus ending our lovely October summer. Or perhaps it's not the end - but it feels like it must be. And I, for one, am glad to be free of our tyrannical sun overlord, since I like huddling up under down comforters and have a lot of flannel pajamas to rotate through.

I would have done more huddling today, in fact, but a) it wasn't raining yet and b) I had commitments. No writing got done, but I did spend some quality time with my roommate. True to our forms, I talked to her about survival gear and preparing for the apocalypse, and she dragged me to Bloomingdale's so she could buy a sweater and some boots. I may be able to keep us hydrated, but she's clearly going to look hotter while we're dying. Bitch.

The preparation book I started reading this morning is hilarious - as I told Terry, my decision was to buy a prepper book by one of the crazies, and then tone it down to fit my own views on the likelihood of an apocalyptic event that requires me to leave the city immediately. This book is all about building a 'bug-out bag' (BOB) with stuff needed to survive the first seventy-two hours - at which point you should have reached your 'bug-out location' (BOL), which you have already prepared as a safe haven. Nowhere in the book does he discuss that there are plenty of emergencies where having a BOB is a great idea, but where it's also going to be fine to hang out in your home (or near it) while services are restored. Apparently, in his view, whenever there's a disaster, you make a run for your BOL and then ask questions later.

What I would find particularly hilarious is that if all these people who have built secret hideaways in the Rockies/Utah/Idaho/Nevada were all prepared for a major cataclysmic event...and then that event turned out to be the eruption of the Yellowstone supervolcano, which would bury all of them under several inches/feet of ash. But I digress.

Anyway, the book is interesting, and at some point I'll figure out what's useful vs. what's crazy and start planning from there. Eventually, Terry and I went to the mall, then came home, and then I drove to the glorious south bay and had dinner with Alaska Matt, his wife Kia, and their (relatively) new baby, which was awesome - I hadn't seen them in ages, so it was good to catch up. And now I'm home and desperately need to go to bed; writing *must* happen tomorrow, and I must also go back to my short-lived vow to avoid phone and laptop since my neck is killing me. And how am I going to carry a BOB from here to my BOL with a sore neck? Goodnight!

you make me feel like i've been locked out of heaven

Today got off to an unusual start - I woke up at 5:30 a.m., which is v. v. unusual since I now only get up before eight if I have a romance writer meeting (once a month) or an early flight. But I didn't plan to wake up at 5:30 - instead, it was forced upon me because the fire alarm in my bedroom started chirping. If there was any way to keep sleeping through it, I would have, but it proved impossible, and so I put on pants and glasses and drove to Safeway to buy a battery. Then I came home, installed the battery, went back to bed, and slept until ten, thus demonstrating my dedication to my sleep.

When I finally woke up, I messed around on the internet, made a hamburger for breakfast/lunch (perhaps that's weird, but I had a package of hamburger I needed to use and there's really nothing better than a hamburger any time of day), spilled a whole glass of iced tea in the living room (no ill effects other than to my temper), and then settled in to write. I didn't get as much done as I would have liked to, but that's okay; I finished the scene that I was working on, and then made the mistake of taking a break to go to Philz and get a coffee and some fresh coffee beans. When I got home, I instead turned my attention to watching the last bit of Big Game while organizing my emails - I didn't *answer* any emails, but I archived everything I don't need to answer, which is actually progress in my book.

But I had to stop messing around eventually because I had a party in the south bay tonight and I had to shower/dry my hair/put on makeup/put on heels like a normal employed girl (which I am certainly not, if my aching feet are any indication - I can barely tolerate heels anymore). The party was a joint birthday party for the big boss (remember her?) and the big boss's husband, who I had also worked pretty closely with way back in the day. I had a great time, since I got to catch up with a lot of people that I worked with when I worked with her, including both people who are still at Google and people who have moved on to Twitter, Facebook, etc., etc. And I got to chat with the big boss and her husband, of course, and admire their house, which is totally gorgeous and makes me feel like I'm living in a hovel (albeit a hovel with a view of the Golden Gate Bridge from the roof deck, so as hovels go, it's not too bad).

And then I came home, glad that I am writing romance novels and not answering emails for a living (since I'm clearly terrible at email now, and it's only getting worse). And now I shall go to sleep and attempt to write more tomorrow - goodnight!

when i see your face

Nothing at all to report today...I suffered through my hangover, did some writing, did some errand-running, did some eating, and did some tv-watching with Terry. Yes, boring. But I will continue to be boring until I'm done with the current draft of the book, so get used to it. And now I shall sleep so that I can write more tomorrow - goodnight!

long nights, strange men

If I were to draw a picture of my blood alcohol level for today, it would look like a two-humped camel (aka Bactrian, although perhaps I shouldn't have reveal that I know that). Or, perhaps my picture of a Bactrian camel would look like my alcohol consumption - I'm such a bad artist that any squiggly line could be meant to stand in for any other squiggly line. Sorry.

sssanyway, I was actually productive today, despite that inauspicious opening paragraph. I woke up, did a bunch of work, typed ten manuscript pages into my laptop, and had just started writing new stuff when the cleaners showed up. Yes, this is a first world problem. But since they seem to prefer if I'm not here while they clean, and I have no desire to hang out and watch them and feel guilty about my overly posh life, I immediately left. I had to go to the post office anyway, so I did that...and then I was walking back toward my place, with the intention of going to Starbucks and writing. But I got seduced by the vision of an outdoor table at a bar, since it was a legitimately warm day in the city (not 60 degrees, but like 80 degrees - unheard of). So I got a glass of white wine and intended to sit there and write while nursing my glass. Instead, I had three glasses of wine and some ceviche, and I overheard the most ridiculous conversation ever from an unemployed 47-year-old who seems to enjoy sleeping with married women with low self esteem (his 'friend' turned to me as soon as the guy went to the bathroom and said that he hadn't seen the guy in years, which is a clear sign of how ridic it all was). But, I still managed to write four pages, so I'll take it. And really, days like this come v. rarely to San Francisco, so I have no regrets.

Or rather, I would have had no regrets if it had ended there. Instead, I came home at 7 and made the brilliant move/mistake of texting Adit, who promptly said that he could have dinner at nine p.m. (I'll chalk this up as research into how Regency people lived, since they ate/drank/partied nonstop). That gave me just enough time to sober up for a bit before I met Adit and had another two cocktails + some truly delicious food at Delarosa. Even that might have been survivable, but he missed his bus, and so we had another cocktail at Mauna Loa, which was definitely not advised. But it was good to see him on his own, since it's been months and months since we've done a proper catch-up. And I got home at midnight, which is an hour earlier than Terry estimated, so I'll count that as a win. And now I should really sleep so that I can write through my hangover tomorrow -- goodnight!

there'll be peace when you are done

Sorry for not blogging last night; I was already in bed when I remembered that I hadn't blogged yet, and as nothing particularly exciting had happened, I didn't feel the need to get out of bed just to tell you that I am boring. And that sad fact continues to be true today - I only left the house to check my mail and to sit up on the roof, and I spent the whole day alternating between writing, cooking, and obsessing over natural disasters. I fully recognize that cooking and obsessing were merely attempts to procrastinate from the writing.

But the cooking was excellent - I made home fries with andouille sausage for breakfast, with two eggs over easy to enjoy with them, and I was v. v. happy as a result. And the disaster obsession was...interesting. I recognize that I'm a little OCD about being prepared for stuff, and my current level of preparedness for earthquakes is less than I would like it to be. Google gave me an earthquake kit once, and it's still in my car, but it's like five or six years old at this point, and I'm sure some of the stuff has expired. And I have shoes and a first aid kit under my bed, and a bunch of year-old bottled water in the storage unit, but that's not really a plan. I was randomly adding stuff to my Amazon cart as I thought of it, but then I scaled back and just bought a disaster preparedness guide (trying to find one that is reasonable without trying to convince you that you need a second way-off-the-grid home deep in the woods + a beater truck converted to run on biodiesel + two years' worth of beans is surprisingly difficult).

And, despite my decision to hold off on buying anything until I have a plan, I also bought a really cool solar-chargeable AM/FM/NOAA weather radio. While we never have weather in California, it feels strange to me not to have a weather radio given the reliance on them in my hometown, and this model is particularly cool because you can also charge your smartphone from it, which seems like an incredibly useful feature. If you want one, you can get it here.

In other news, I wrote several pages of zee romance novel, so that's good. And I hung out with Terry, which was also good. And now, I must sleep so that I can continue being productive tomorrow, hopefully without being convinced that the world is going to end (which may just be wishful thinking on my part, since if the world ends I don't have to finish this book). Goodnight!

and in a pipe she flies to the motherland

Today took a v. abrupt, v. welcome left turn, which means I wrote about sixty words instead of six thousand words. I got up, puttered around the house, and then walked down the street to have breakfast at a cafe and reread the last ten pages of my manuscript so that I could figure out the next scene. I intended to walk to another cafe after that and work all afternoon...but instead, while I was eating, I got a phone call from Walter (aka Harold, aka the Talbotross), who said that he was three hours away and asked whether I had time to hang out this afternoon. I threw caution to the winds and pretended that I am not writing a book so that I could hang out with him, since I would surely regret indulging my hermit tendencies at the expense of getting to catch up with Walter for the first time in over a year...and according to the blog, I last saw him March 28/29, 2011, which was quite some time ago indeed.

Anyway, Walter showed up and we hung out in my apartment for awhile, and then we walked down to the marina and looked at the water, the boats, and the woman who has trained pigeons to let her cuddle them (ew). Then we came back to my place, hung out some more, and then had dinner at Chow (much more satisfying and sanitary than watching a woman cuddle a pigeon). Then we met up with John and Jess for a drink (alcohol for me and John, hot chocolate for Jess and Walter, as life should be). And now I should really sleep; Walter brings out a purely crazy level of awkward/awesome in me, and I need to restore myself if I'm going to handle having breakfast with him - he's sleeping on my couch, so I will see him in the morning before he continues his trek north. Goodnight!

diamonds in the sky

This morning was rough, as is to be expected after last night's shenanigans. My mom said that when she first checked my blog this morning, I hadn't written yet, which is a testament to both how late I stayed up and how early she woke up. However, I would assume (I did not ask) that she did not wake up to an alarm that had been going off for awhile, the remnants of a bunch of daiquiris running through her veins, and the unwelcome knowledge that she had to get up and be presentable to a classy bridal shower in an hour. Bleh.

But, Terry wins the roommate award (stiff competition!) because she went to Starbucks and got me coffee, and also drove us to the shower and then dropped me off after so I could retrieve my car from where I'd left it last night. And I think I pulled off the appearance of sobriety and responsibility quite well at Lauren's shower, even if I was feeling just a bit out of my element since I was struggling through a hangover while most of her other guests were talking about their small children, their cats, etc. I don't have small children for obvious reasons, and I don't have a cat because I refuse to be a romance novelist who lives alone with a cat, so I just drank my water and tried to get my brain to work. The shower was v. lovely, though; it was at Lauren's house, but her mom made some v. delicious crustless quiche and a nice salad, and I really like Lauren's female relatives, so it was great to get to see them. And the shower was garden themed, so I got Lauren some of the deadheading/snipping shears that my mom likes and a bunch of seeds for various herbs and lettuces, so hopefully she enjoys them (and invites me over to eat the fruits of her labors next year).

After the shower, I came home and promptly collapsed into a nonverbal, dehydrated heap, and I ended up taking a nap before talking to my parents, who seem to be in good spirits. Then I put some clothes on (since I'd gone all out on my nap and put my nightgown on) and went downstairs, where I ate some tuna and watched tv with Terry and her sister for several hours. And now, I must sleep; I have to be over my hangover tomorrow so I can return to my no computer/no phone/no driving/tons of writing plan for the week. Goodnight!

i'd rather run the other way than stay and see

I don't even know what to say about today - it was like I had two days, since I had one fairly awful day, took a nap, and then had one fairly awesome day. The fairly awful day started with getting up at 7:45 so that I could shower, make coffee, and leave the house in time to make it to my romance meeting, where I had to tell the assembled throngs that I'm not running for VP of programs again next year - it's the right decision since so much is up in the air for me, but it still wasn't easy. And the projector didn't really work for one of the most visual presentations we've had this year (by a cover artist), which I felt some personal responsibility for even though there's nothing I could have done. Bleh. But as usual, it was good to hang out with some other writers, and I had lunch after with a couple of my favorite members, so that was fun.

Post meeting, I drove back to the city of sin and went to the Whole Foods in SOMA, where I stocked up on all the ingredients necessary to cook for the dinner party I was supposed to have tonight. I had planned to make boeuf bourguignon, mashed potatoes, gluten free chocolate chip cookies, etc., and I bought a bottle of wine for the boeuf and a bunch of chips and salsa to snack on while the food was cooking. However, as soon as I got home, I opened my back door and discovered, too late, that the wine had rolled up against the door, and when I opened the door it fell out and shattered in the garage, which took ten minutes to clean up. Stupid.

But worse was that just as I was putting the cookies in the over, Salim called and said they had to cancel. That left Alaska Matt and Kia (and their relatively new baby), and so I texted them saying that rather than cooking I would just order in, and they responded by flaking too. While I understand the flake on all sides, I was still pretty pissed off (not at them, at the general state of the world). So I put away the bouef ingredients, ate a row of chewies, knitted, and then slept for an hour. I was v., v., v. close to just staying in and indulging in a pity party...

...but Adit had planned his birthday party for tonight, and I finally, sternly, grimly convinced myself that I had to go (despite the fact that at this point I was already half asleep in my bed). So, I rallied, and I'm v. glad I did; as sometimes happens, I went from zero to six thousand, and so I had at least four hemingway daiquiris and part of a vodka cranberry (on a stomach filled only with chewies, which may have been a mistake). And I saw all the usual suspects - Adit, Priyanka, Vidya, Katrina, John, Jess, Cathy, Tom, Julie, Deano, Minnie, etc. The last small group of us closed out the bar at two a.m., and then Adit, Priyanka, Chandlord, two other peeps, and I ended up at Grubstake, where I v. much enjoyed some v. cheesy potato skins in an old, converted trolley car. Yes, I'm such a hipster.

And now I really must sleep; I have a shower to attend in the morning, which is going to be super brutal, and at some point I need to retrieve my car and write ten pages. Goodnight!

and suddenly i become a part of your past

Day One of limiting my laptop/cellphone/driving was a qualified success - qualified because I wasn't 100% successful, but I was way, way more successful than usual, and my neck really didn't hurt much all day. I spent some time on my ipad this morning (loophole!), then showered, grabbed my notebook, and had brunch down the street, which was a mistake since it's Friday and so my usually-dead cafe was full of post-college frat boys drinking bloody marys in preparation for the weekend. But I overheard an awesome conversation about how some dude's best man is furious at him for marrying the girl he wanted to marry, so that was entertaining. Then I walked down to Fort Mason and kept working, and all in all I wrote close to ten pages by hand. Yay!

When I got home, I cleaned my room and took care of some minor tings before getting in my car (I decided driving would still make me feel better than risking my life with the cabbies) and driving to Mission Beach Cafe to have dinner with Jenni, Nick, and Nick's girlfriend. You may remember Jenni from two nights ago; you may remember Nick from my time in India, where he played a masterful role in my birthday scavenger hunt and attempted to get a room at Passion Men's Hostel on only his second day in India. Ha. I hadn't seen him in at least three years, and in fact just realized that he shares a name with the Nick I'm currently writing a book about - awkward. They're not the same person, I assure you. sssanyway, we had an awesome dinner, and then we went to a bar down the street and watched the pivotal final inning of the Nationals/Cardinals baseball game (where I discovered that the guy who I'd seen earlier wearing what I thought was a Walgreens baseball cap was actually wearing a Washington Nationals cap - that's definitely an upgrade).

And now, sadly, I must sleep; I have my monthly romance meeting tomorrow, which is the hardest morning of the month for me. Goodnight!

i'm losing you and it's effortless

I'm getting desperate to make my neck feel better, and desperate times call for desperate measures. [note: if you don't enjoy me going on about my neck like a cranky octogenarian, skip to the next two paragraphs] I'm pretty sure my woes stem from a combination of typing on my laptop, scrolling on my smartphone, and driving, since it's worse whenever I'm doing anything related to those activities. The laptop is particularly problematic, since my whole job/life involves the computer...but that's probably a reason to figure this out and fix it now, rather than waiting until it's so debilitating that I can't type.

So, goal for the next three weeks: stop using my smartphone, limit my driving to essential trips only, and only check email twice a day (and write a quick blog post so you know if I've survived another day). This fits with my goal to get through this draft of the book anyway, since I'm writing by hand already and can just keep going with that without messing with the laptop. If that helps, then I'll have to figure out how to adjust everything a little more permanently - perhaps by getting some of the voice recognition dictation software that I know a lot of writers use. Or by becoming a luddite and hiring someone to type up my handwritten manuscripts (ha). We'll see how this goes!

As for the rest of the day - it was pretty good, all things considered. I had to go to the far south bay for a dentist appointment, since I've never bothered to find a dentist in the city. Everything looked good, although they tried to upsell me on invisible braces that I don't need and that they were appealing to my vanity to try to sell - they said my bite is perfect and everything's in great shape, but six months of invisible braces could make my teeth perfectly spaced, since I never had braces as a kid. Ha. After the dentist, I went to Stanford and worked for a few hours; I had to type up the 6000ish words I've written in the past week, and I made it through that without dying, so yay. I figured out that the most ergonomically pleasing way to type from my notebook was to prop the notebook up on my screen and stare straight ahead at it, and then go back after every page and correct whatever typos I made from typing blind - bizarre, but it worked. And now I must go to bed - I need to write tomorrow, and grocery shop, and try not to go crazy from my laptop/smartphone withdrawal. Goodnight!

i wish you were a stranger, i could disengage

I had fun today! Totally not allowed, I know. I will admit I got a little distracted this morning; I had to answer comments on the guest blog post I did for the Rubies, and also Amazon released this new 'feature' (aka a torture device) in which it updates the popularity ranking of all authors every single hour. If that's not torture, I don't know what is. Luckily, I'm apparently popular right now - I'm currently #60 in the top 100 historical romance authors on Amazon. This means approximately nothing, since it's only Amazon sales, and my previous free downloads must have counted toward that average...but I still feel good about tings, since the majority of the authors on the list have well more than two books out, so I must be doing something right (other than the amount of time I spend obsessing over stuff, which is totally wrong).

But I had to stop working around one p.m. and drive to the dirty east bay to pick up my bridesmaid dress for Lauren's wedding. I will freely admit that I wasn't super psyched; the dress was picked by Lauren's sister, who is 5'7" and v. skinny, and so I was pretty sure I was going to look like a trainwreck (in a more literal sense of the word - squashed in all the wrong places). But, as it turns out, I had psyched myself out for naught; the color is lovely, and while the dress didn't make me 5'7" and skinny, it accentuates some kickass curves that I can accept. And it doesn't need altered! So, that's all a win.

I got back to the city around 4:30 (I ate after getting the dress, then tried to buy a jacket at REI, but they were out), and I did a bit of work and took a nap before meeting up with Jenni at a wine bar in Russian Hill. I hadn't spent any quality time with her since the last time we met at that wine bar, which was like six months ago, so it was great to see her. When we parted ways, I called Chandlord on a whim and met up with her and Katie at Bob's Donuts, where my wine-soaked state convinced me that it was a good idea to have a donut (hint: it wasn't). And now that I'm home, I need to sleep - I have a dentist appointment tomorrow, and I must write or else I deserve to be shot. Goodnight!

it's for the best you didn't listen

I need to sleep immediately...today was productive in a lot of ways, but not in the Nick and Ellie ways, and I'm going to pay for it tomorrow. But I ran a ton of necessary errands, had a lovely lunch with Becky and Christine (some of my writing friends), wrote a long guest blog for the Rubies (on discoverability and marketing - not particularly interesting to any of you, but if you are interested, it's here), and went to the library and worked for a couple of hours. So, yay to all that.

But the most exciting things are that a) I got a new pillow and b) I bought some IcyHot strips to slap on the side of my neck. They feel awesome - I'm not sure I'm in less pain, but I'm in icyhot pain instead of muscle pain, and at this point I'll totally take it. So, I'm going to go to bed with my icyhot and my new pillow like a grumpy octogenarian and hope that I feel better enough to type tomorrow. Goodnight!

tonight you're the prey, i'm the hunter

I'm tired and cranky and oh-so-hermity, but I wrote three pages today - three hardfought pages that should have been ten or fifteen pages for the amount of time I agonized over them, but three pages is way more than nothing, so I'll take it. I also knitted while I mulled over the next phase of the plot, which I think kind of shocked Terry - when she came home, she found me on the couch with a thousand-yard stare, and when she asked me how the writing was going, I responded with 'I taught myself how to knit' and held up 10.5" of scarf that I had made between yesterday and today. Ha. But then, she shocked me by saying she is now only watching tv on weekends, so I guess we're even.

I couldn't think anymore at that point, so I spent the evening staring at the manuscript to no avail, and then taking care of a whole ton of little things that have been niggling at the corners of my mind demanding attention. This means I now have a lot of errands to run tomorrow, but I think I'll survive. For now, though, it's bedtime - and let's hope that this f'ing scene ends tomorrow so that I can get on to something that doesn't take hours per page. Goodnight!

law of conservation of words

Nothing worth blogging about tonight - I wrote several pages today at rather great personal cost, and not nearly as many pages as the hours I put into them. Bleh. Then I talked to my parents, walked to the overpriced organic grocery store four blocks away to avoid the shitshow that I was sure to find if I drove to the Marina Safeway, and made taco salad for me and Terry since my mom had me craving it. Then I watched some sports that I cared nothing about because it was better than looking at my notebook again...and then I came upstairs and taught myself how to knit. I must be getting close to the end of this draft, since I had this same bizarre urge to learn how to knit when I was wrapping up HEIRESS a year and a half ago. But this time I have bigger needles (so it looks like it's going faster) and more exciting yarn (a pinkish/reddish/orangeish multicolor), so it's kind of awesome. I'm sure the urge will pass, but as a way to detox my mind and rekindle all the words that I've burned out during a day of hardcore slogging, it's not a bad hobby to pick up.

And now I must go to sleep so that I can repeat this whole mess again tomorrow, hopefully with a bit more speed and a bit less angsting over every single word choice. Goodnight!

you and i go hard at each other like we're going to war

Today was lovely; I took the day off to enjoy living in the city of sin, which is extra sinful this weekend since it seems like every event ever is happening all at once. In fact, there were so many people in town that I think it overwhelmed our cell tower; I was having trouble getting calls and texts, and then would get a whole string of messages at once. Boo. It's Fleet Week AND there are America's Cup events going on at the same time, all of which are located really close to my neighborhood, so the entire area was kind of a shitshow.

But, I had a great day despite the tourists; Heather (aka dear respected madam) and Salim came up for the day, and I picked them up in another area of the city since there was no way they would ever find parking here. I dropped Salim off as close to Pier 39 as I could get before the traffic got too bad, and then Heather and I came to my place, where we spent the afternoon eating, drinking, and eventually watching the Blue Angels from my roof deck. I made chicken skewers and roasted tomato caprese salad for lunch, Terry made guacamole, and we drank peach bellinis, followed by rose (that should be ros-AY, all fancy, but I don't want to try to find the accented e), followed by mojitos. And, as was the case last year, the view of the Blue Angels from our roof deck was awesome, and it seemed like everyone in the Marina was out on their roofs watching the action.

Salim eventually reunited with us after walking back from Pier 39, and we watched last week's episode of 'The Voice' (mostly so that Heather and I could proclaim our attraction to Blake Shelton) before we went to Heather and Salim's favorite thai place in the city for a delicious and much-needed supper. Then I dropped them off at their car, came home, and am now contemplating life and thinking about how much I like living in the most expensive city ever vs. how much I like doing a job that pays nothing. The choice, it burns. I shall sleep on it, as I always do, and hope the choice doesn't burn a hole through my stomach lining to join all the other ulcers I've given myself. On that cheerful note, goodnight!

i still recall a sad cafe

I wrote five v. v. hard-fought pages today and am basically out of words, so you're lucky you're getting any blog at all (if lucky is the right word for the opportunity to read my drivel). But I accomplished what I set out to accomplish today; I made a v. quick trip to Palo Alto to check my mail, drop off my favorite pair of sandals and a purse to get repaired at a cobbler there, and eat at Chipotle, and then came back to the evil city (with stops at BevMo and Whole Foods to stock up for the weekend). Then I took care of stuff around the house and alternated between writing and pulling my hair out until nine p.m. Then I called it quits and reread part of 'Scotsmen Prefer Blondes' to remind myself that I'm capable of telling a coherent and at least mildly enjoyable story. Ha.

And now it's sleepytime - I need to write five pages tomorrow to keep on track, and I have grand plans to watch some Blue Angels since it's Fleet Week. Luckily those grand plans don't involve leaving my house - there are some advantages to the Marina. Goodnight!

kashmir

I'm tired and hermity, so you're not going to get much out of me tonight - today was productive, although the productivity came late and so I haven't had a chance to recover my words. I was supposed to have lunch with Gyre today, but I canceled in the name of writing, which was a good call; instead, I went to a cafe and worked for a couple of hours, figuring out how to approach the next scene, etc. Then I went to the grocery store, came home, and was v. startled to find that our cleaning lady decided to come today instead of tomorrow. However, mid-afternoon today was way better than nine a.m. tomorrow, so I'll take it.

Thus banished from my house, I walked down to the marina area and wrote in a cafe for an hour or so with the sounds of fighter jets (it's Fleet Week) roaring overhead. Then I came home, cooked supper (a gluten-free pizza casserole thing that my mom had tried while I was home; it's not pizza, but it's a decent alternative if you like a casserole dish full of cheese). Terry came home from LA while I was cooking, so we caught up while my thing baked. She went out for drinks with some people, but I ate supper and then wrote another 3.5 pages to add to the page and a half that I'd written at the cafe. Those five pages are closer to ten pages since I'm writing in a notebook with absurdly narrow rules (my fave), so I'm pleased with that. And then I came upstairs, flushed all my fountain pens (by that I mean I emptied them and flushed them with water, not that I flushed them down the toilet) - not the most pressing thing on my agenda, but since they'd all been inked up at various points this summer and then abandoned, it was necessary to do at some point. Yes, I'm a dork. And now I must sleep so that I may get up and repeat today's productivity - goodnight!

a town called mercy

All told, I was rather lazy today; this probably makes sense given that I burned myself out on contest entries yesterday, but I'm not pleased with myself. I spent the morning reconciling sales reports that my agent's assistant sent (for July - tings are slow in publishing, but about 6-12mo faster than if I were getting royalty statements from a traditional publisher). And then I messed around doing who knows what until it was time to meet up with Marina (not the neighborhood, the girl who used to live in Loro when I was a freshman). She's an artist who lives in Cyprus now, but she's in town for Stanford homecoming, and we got together for tea since I'm not attending any of the reunion events. It was lovely to see her and catch up on what she's been doing in Europe, so that was super fun.

Then I came home, intended to write - and instead watched the presidential debate, even though I had vowed until thirty seconds before it came on that I wasn't going to. Then I watched the commentary on both CBS and PBS (thank you, tivo). Then I decided I was in no state to write romance after all that, so I watched four episodes of "Doctor Who". I almost never watch television (or, at least, in comparison to my roommate), and I'd saved up all five episodes of the fall mini-season, and I decided I should watch them before the result of the fifth episode is spoiled for me (since it's kind of miraculous that it hasn't been spoiled already). So I watched four of them, and quite enjoyed them, but realized that it was suicide to start the fifth episode at midnight - it stars the Weeping Angels, which are my least favorite villain ever, and I'm not ashamed to admit that I had to sleep with my light on the first time I saw an episode with them. So, I'm saving it for a different time - like, say, at breakfast, with lots of coffee and sunlight and twelve hours afterward to forget them before it's time to close my eyes.

And now, I need to sleep - tomorrow must be much more productive than today. Goodnight!

one of these mornings

Apologies for not blogging last night; I was in the midst of a truly annoying project and was falling asleep over my keyboard when I finally decided to throw in the towel, and I couldn't bear to stay awake any longer and blog. But yesterday was mostly lovely; I spent the day attempting to write and finally figured out what was wrong with the scene I had been struggling with, so that is good news. Then I went to my old neighborhood (yes, I realize I have like fourteen old neighborhoods; this one is where I used to live with Adit) to have dinner with John, Jess, and Emily, who is in town from Berlin. It was great to catch up with all of them, of course, if slightly surreal to see them in the same place and consider how we're all getting old.

But I couldn't hang out all night; I had to come home and start on this stupid thing I got roped into. As I mentioned in my Sunday night blog post, I had finished judging the 8 entries I was assigned for my chapter's writing contest, but some other judge claimed she had never gotten hers and then refused to do any of the ones she was assigned. We asked for volunteers, but only a couple of people helped out - and since it had to get done immediately and I am a total sucker, I ended up with sixteen entries to judge. That basically took two hours last night and seven hours or so today - each entry is 15pgs, which doesn't take forever to read, but the stupid f'ing scoring sheet requires scoring 20 different attributes on a 1-5 scale and writing a comment for any score equal to or less than a three. Ugh ugh ugh. But I'm done, and some of the entries were really good, so at least there's that.

So, you can guess that I spent all day judging entries today. I took a break to make myself a knock-off of the bayou omelette I had in New Haven a couple of weeks ago - andouille sausage, shrimp, peppers and onions, cheddar cheese, tomatoes, and sour cream. I made a scramble instead of an omelette, and I think I messed up a few things: I used too many sundried tomatoes, too much olive oil, not enough pepper and onion, and my cheddar cheese was just slightly over the hill. Despite that would-be-catastrophic number of fuck-ups, it was still really good, and I'm prepared to try again someday.

Around three p.m., though, I realized I needed to get out of here and head to the south bay to beat traffic before dinner. So I went to a Starbucks down there and judged contest entries like a madwoman until it was time to meet Heather (aka dear respected madam) for a v. belated dinner to celebrate my birthday. We talked about all manner or topics, as per usual, and it was great to see her and catch up on all the latest in our respective lives. I also resisted the siren's call of margaritas (or, more accurately, the siren's call of the waiter who always tries to get me drunk; I had one margarita, which was about three too few in his view), so I was able to come home tonight and sleep in my own bed like a responsible adult. Ha. As soon as I got here, I had to finish inputting feedback on seven entries, but now I'm done, and I'm going to stop volunteering and stop seeing people and move into a cave on a mountain top where I, too, can claim that I can't possibly do stuff like this. Ha.

Okay, sleepytime beckons - goodnight!

maybe tomorrow the good lord will take you away

Man, I'm tired. I sadly didn't write anything of my own today, but I did judge a bunch of contest entries that were due tonight. More sadly, I may have gotten roped into judging more of them tomorrow, since one of the judges claims she never received the entries she was assigned (I smell a rat), and since I'm on the board of the chapter, I kind of got tapped to help out. Ugh. So, I need to get up early tomorrow and write before the additional entries show up - I have grand plans for a month of hermity productivity starting tomorrow, and I can't let contests or visitors or the lure of far-off places distract me from finishing MARQUESS so that I can move on with my life.

But at least I felt productive today, and I cleared a lot of stuff off my to-do list that had been looming for awhile. I also cleaned off my desk, which made me happy. And I went to a cafe and ate/chatted with Terry before we both did some work for awhile, which was nice since she's going out of town (wise lady - she doesn't want to be here for my initial descent into madness). But now I must sleep if I have any hope of getting tings done tomorrow - goodnight!