don't need no credit card to ride this train

Today was Wampler Family Christmas (tm), which, as usual, meant much eating and much merrymaking. People were shockingly late getting down here from Des Moines, which means I was (even more shockingly) awake, showered, and fully dressed before anyone showed up. But everyone was down here by eleven, and then Aunt B and I went into town to pick up Gram so that she could hang out with us this afternoon. We kicked things off with lunch (smoked turkey and a variety of side dishes), then opened Christmas presents (yay), and then most of us played Cards Against Humanity all afternoon. Gram didn't play, which was utterly for the best, and my father and the scandalous Uncle Brian didn't play for reasons unknown to me, but the rest of us had a grand time.

'Grand time' makes it sound so civilized, though. It's basically an adult version of Apples to Apples, which was v. welcome in a group with a v. raunchy collective sense of humor; I think all of us were utterly bored with Apples to Apples by the time we last played it together, but the group (mom, [censored], Drewbaby, Aunt B, Uncle Mark, and Aunt Kathy) was too big to play Rail Baron, hearts, or canasta. So, Cards Against Humanity was a good fit, particularly with the added hazard of never knowing when Gram would wander by when you had to read off a card that said 'clitoris' or 'jacking off into a pool of children's tears'. We stopped around 5:30 so that we could clean broken glass off [censored] while Becky and Mark went into town to check into their respective motel rooms and buy some rum so I could make some eggnog. Then, we ate soup (vegetable beef soup + black bean chili), drank some eggnog (okay, only Becky and I drank eggnog), and played another round of Cards Against Humanity. My dad played that time, and he ended up winning it (that bastard).

And now, bedtime approacheth; I am risking a hangover with my eggnog/wine consumption today, but more to the point I barely had any water and perhaps didn't eat enough, which is always a dangerous mix. Or maybe I just have a headache from laughing until I cried so often - it's unclear. [censored] is taking Drewbaby to [censored] early tomorrow, and then we're all having breakfast (sans Drewbaby) before people start heading back to the Des Moines metropolitan area (which makes it sound so metropolitan!). And then I have a scant few hours to wrap presents and take care of tings before Christmas Eve arrives. Goodnight!