if i had the chance i'd ask the world to dance

Today was supremely boring and uneventful. Since I went to bed early last night, I woke up before seven, and I ended up working on tax and financial stuff for a couple of hours (fun, right?). Then I showered and went down the street for breakfast. Terry joined me as I was finishing up, so I hung out while she ate, and it was all generally lovely.

Then I came home and acted like a domestic goddess for a couple of hours - I folded clothes, cleaned the bathroom and kitchen, changed my sheets, etc., etc. I had tentatively planned to have fun in the sun this afternoon, but those plans got pushed to tomorrow, and so I took a walk and got an iced latte from Rapha. That was supposed to fuel some afternoon writing, but as it turns out, it mostly fueled me taking a nap. Oops.

But I rallied for more productivity - I bought groceries, got food delivered from my favorite Greek place since I was feeling too hermity to go out, and then made chicken tortilla soup for tomorrow's Super Bowl viewing. I hate the Seahawks and don't care at all about the Patriots, but as an excuse to make soup it's a pretty good one, so I'll take it. And now I'm going to go to sleep - since tomorrow has about a billion more plans than today did, I should probably prepare for it. Goodnight!

if i could find a way to see this straight i'd run away

I may be exceedingly lame and go to bed before 10pm on a Friday night...it's been a long (albeit mostly good) week with not nearly enough sleep, and the thought of rallying and leaving my bed to pursue other entertainments is not giving me any joy at all. But today was a decent end to the week - I went to the gym, where Alyssa continued to press her nefarious kettlebell agenda, and then made it to work in time to take what may have been the most ridiculous meeting of my entire week. But I survived it, as I always do...

...and then I took one more meeting, grabbed a salad, and spent the next couple of hours in a conference room with several coworkers doing some desultory work and watching 'The Theory of Everything'. I'd brought champagne to contribute to the popcorn and cupcakes someone else had brought, and it was all generally lovely (even if we weren't paying close enough attention to the movie, given the fact we were all making various and differing attempts to work). After the movie was over, I did a bit more work, but I quickly threw in the towel and drove home.

On the way, I was thrilled to receive a call from Katie, who, despite being one timezone ahead of me, was trying to survive her last twenty minutes at work and had certainly not spent her 'work day' watching movies and getting free lattes. Sad. So, we caught up for a bit, which is never enough. Then I got home, tidied up, saw my aesthetician, and then met Kathia for a v. fancy dinner at Stones Throw, which is really only a stone's throw away from me (on the Russian Hill side of Van Ness), although I'd never been there before. The food was awesome - we split some charred carrots and some pork belly to start, and I had a striped bass that was totally great (I know, I ordered fish - I promise I don't have a terminal disease that led to such a strange choice). And it was great to catch up with Kathia over food instead of over our notebooks/laptops/lattes/stress like we normally do.

After that, I should have continued the party and gone to the Mission to see some other friends, but as I said before, I'm totally wrecked. So I'm going to go to bed and hope that tomorrow treats me right - goodnight!

i could show you incredible things

I somehow haven't had a complete meltdown from managing two jobs + my social life this week, so I'm pretty pleased with myself. Today was more of what I've reported before - oddly, I woke up at four a.m. and couldn't really sleep again, but I stayed in bed until my alarm went off at 5:40. Then I got ready, drove south, and was at work by 7:30, which gave me almost ninety minutes to brainstorm Rafe and Octavia. I was relieved to see that I'm still getting closer to a viable story line (as I believed yesterday) - and I spent some time today rereading some scenes from Thorington's book to see what I've actually locked myself into vs. what I *think* I've locked myself into (good news: I was so fucking vague in the last book that I can do almost anything in this book). So that's a relief.

sssanyway, productivity was somewhat interrupted by coworkers bearing gifts of bacon, but bacon makes everything better, so I forgave the intrusion immediately. Then I spent the morning being productive, the midday enjoying lunch in the sun (there are benefits to California, despite its atrocious cost of living), the afternoon slogging some more (including leading a totally ridiculous discussion about whether or not to have cake on individual birthdays vs. in team meetings, which was as much of a clusterfuck as I expected), and the evening waging war on the highway against my 100-min commute.

But it all ended on a positive note - I had a lateish dinner with Lauren (aka Subz) and Terry at Troya on Fillmore, which was totally perfect. We had a lot of delish Mediterranean food, and we split a bottle of wine, which of course means I probably had two-thirds of it. C'est la vie. And now, after a lovely evening, a lot of ridic conversation, some mild flirting with our Lyft driver, and not enough post-dinner rehydration, I'm going to bed so I can repeat this again tomorrow - goodnight!

i'm dying to see how this one ends

Today was supremely uninteresting. I made it into the office by 7:45, which gave me an hour to write (or stare off into space) before starting my actual work. I'm slowly working my way into some interesting ideas, I think...maybe this will actually turn into a book someday (but I'm not holding my breath that it's going to happen before the weekend).

After the writing session, it was all vaguely downhill. I had some meetings, and then I had to go to the dentist for my usual checkup, which wasn't fun - as usual, I had no cavities, but for some reason I was more uncomfortable than usual with the cleaning, and I really didn't want to be there. Then I went back to work, which I also didn't want to be at, although I was moderately productive. I also filled out the application for my India visa, which was a supreme pain. By the time I was done, my commute was already fucked, so I hung around and talked to some coworkers until sixish, at which point I was beyond done. So I sat in traffic, finally got home, ate some tuna salad (dinner of champions), and am now going to go to bed absurdly early so that I can recharge and do it all again tomorrow. Goodnight!

babe we're only here, oh for a little while

I continue my unsustainable grind of two full-time jobs, an attempt to work out, and a reasonably active social life. Today, I made it out of bed by 6:15, into my car in my workout clothes, and on campus by 7:30, which gave me twenty-five minutes to write before my first meeting of the day. But I survived the first meeting, survived the atrocity of my cafe's current breakfast situation (the only meat is mortadella, which is NOT A BREAKFAST FOOD - and yes, that's a complaint about free food) because someone brought me bacon for my second meeting, and then slogged for another hour before going to train with Alyssa.

Alyssa was good, although I'm still recovering from zee illness and so didn't feel totally on top of my workout. Then I went back to work and slogged all afternoon before eventually leaving to meet Shedletsky and Tina for dinner in San Carlos. I hadn't seen them since my birthday, which seems criminal since we live so relatively close to each other - but between finishing my last book + Germany + the holidays, I kind of let a lot of social situations slide. However, we reunited v. successfully over Burmese food (like Thai food, but with more political oppression?), and we have grand plans to reunite more regularly going forward.

But now it's already too late for me to go to bed without wanting to die when I do this all again tomorrow, so I'm going to call this - goodnight!

let me live that fantasy

Ah, Monday, how I loathe thee. I actually made it out the door by 6:30 this morning despite last night's (mild) debauchery, and so I had an hour to write at the cafe on campus before my first meeting of the day. And I maybe, kind of, had an idea for Octavia that I didn't totally hate, although it's still too early to say whether I will continue to not hate it in the morning.

Thus feeling somewhat accomplished and highly caffeinated, I progressed to my building, where I had several hours of meetings in the morning. Then I canceled on lunch with Jenni and the Heathers (that sounds like an 80s band) because I had too much work to contemplate leaving my corner of campus and socializing for the ninety minutes such an endeavor would have taken. I then had more meetings from 1pm to 4pm, but at that point I was totally over it, so I snuck out (and by 'snuck out' I mean that I said goodbye and waltzed merrily out) and drove home.

I was rewarded for my slackerness; the drive only took an hour, which is nearly miraculous. When I got here, I did another hourish of workish, and then I abandoned all screens and walked up to Lafayette Park and back down. When I had returned to the lowlands, I abruptly went for sushi in my neighborhood, where I enjoyed some tasty fish while unexpectedly exchanging chat messages with Walter (aka Harold, aka the Talbotross), who seemed to be in fine form (and whom I hadn't spoken to in months). Terry ended up joining me late, so we caught up while we waited for her take-out order before heading home.

And now I must sleep so that I can try to write again tomorrow before work...wish me luck. Goodnight!

take off all the thoughts of what we've been

Today started off super lowkey, and ended as many of my Sundays do...with family activities to cap the week off right. I slept somewhat late after watching 'Thor' last night, and then I grabbed breakfast down the street before getting my nails done. The nail situation took awhile, since they had to scrape off the gel from last time and I wanted to let the regular manicure I got in its place dry for an exorbitant amount of time so that I didn't screw it up as soon as I left the nail salon. Yes, I know it's important for you to know this.

sssanyway, the manicure left me sleepy, so I came home, bailed on a writing date with Kathia, and napped a little bit - I'm still recovering from this stupid cold, and I'm sleepier than usual. Then I called my parents, who were in fine form. And then I went to a concert! I know, shocking! Jess was performing in a concert of German lieder, and it was truly lovely. The performance included her as the soprano + a pianist + a clarinetist + a violist, and they performed a mix of songs (mostly traditional, but also a new set composed for the event). I know very little about lieder, but Jess's voice was awesome, so it was fun to watch.

Of course, I also had three glasses of champagne over the course of the concert, since they were handing it out like candy before the concert and during the intermission. Sadly, the champagne didn't make the German any more intelligible to me. I sat next to Adit, which went about as you would expect, and in front of Lauren (aka Subz) and Nathan, so I got to talk all of them up a little bit. I also saw Anthony (the guy who threw me into a bush at Lauren's wedding), who now has long hair and looks a bit like he might be a vaguely famous European, and his wife Dormain, who is definitely pregnant. And I hope to catch up with John and Jess sometime soon when they're not in the middle of a performance / hosting all their myriad family members.

After the concert, Lauren and Nathan adjourned to a quiet dinner on their own (good call), and I went with Adit, Misha, Omar, and some other girl (Michelle? I hate names) to dinner at Zuni Cafe. I hadn't been to Zuni since the epic night Adit/Chandlord/I had there many years ago, so it was good to make my acquaintance with their rabbit again (and by that I mean I ate a rabbit). Priyanka met us there as well, so it was sort of like a more upscale-than-usual family dinner, sans some key players (although Omar and Misha are both totally amazeballs ridic and so can do in a pinch).

But I can't recap anymore because I need to go to bed immediately if I want to not die tomorrow - goodnight!

your trojan's in my head

I had a v. hermity day, so there's nothing interesting to report to you. I spent the morning sleeping in, the midday writing at Goody, the afternoon taking care of sundry tasks, the evening writing more at my favorite Greek place, and the nighttime watching 'Thor'. All of this was in the service of trying to continue recovering from my cold; while I probably should have gone to bed two hours ago, at least I'm feeling better today than I was earlier in the week.

But the only way my recovery will continue is if I get a massive amount of sleep tonight, so I'm going to bed - goodnight!

i'll find strength in pain, and i will change my ways

My cough continues to wrack my body, but I slept for eight hours last night, which was so glorious that I almost called in sick so I could keep sleeping. But I pulled myself out of bed and went to the south bay to train with Alyssa. It might not be fair to call it training since it was pretty low-key given my general lack of energy, but it was good to see her and attempt to move again.

Then I went to the office, where I took a couple of meetings, ate some lunch, and then promptly threw in the towel and drove home so that I wouldn't hit traffic. I took another couple of meetings from here before ending sometime after four, at which point I cleaned out the fridge and then took a v. necessary nap.

I probably should have canceled all social plans and kept sleeping, but I rallied and had dinner with Terry at Aix since I needed a steak frites fix and can't get it at Des Amis anymore. When we got home, I took another nap, and then I rallied again and went out for drinks at Upcider, so named because it's upstairs and serves mostly cider. But drinks (well, one drink for me) sapped the last of my remaining energy, so I left the group around midnight and came home to the comfort of my bed and the Mucinex I just bought at the pharmacy, which I'm v. much looking forward to enjoying. And now I must sleep so that I can consider Rafe and Octavia tomorrow - goodnight!

when you're feeling low on love, i'll be what you're dreaming of

I feel surprisingly good considering that the cough woke me up a couple of times last night, to the point that I only got five hours of sleep...but I made it through the work day without dying, so that's exciting. I even made it down to work early, where I did some brainstorming for Rafe and Octavia before grabbing breakfast and watching our group's all-hands meeting with some teammates. This promptly devolved into a side conversation over instant messenger amongst some of us who'd gone to Frankfurt together, which was perhaps not entirely appropriate, but was hilarious enough to keep me awake and engaged despite the fact that I was already crashing.

But all fun things must end, so I spent the rest of the morning doing real work, and then the whole afternoon in meetings. All work must end too, though, so I cut out around 4:30 to go to a team happy hour. The team happy hour was supposed to be a giant group of people, but I arrive to discover that Dave was the only other person from our smaller team (part of the larger group) who had shown up. So we stood off to the side and drank cider and refused to mingle, as is our wont. Ravi eventually showed up as well, so we continued to gossip (er, socialize) until it was time to part ways...

...and then Heather (aka dear respected madam) picked me up, and we had an awesome dinner + time to catch up in Mountain View. I hadn't seen her since saying goodbye to her in Hawaii, which was far too long ago, and so we had much to discuss. But I eventually had to leave her so I could come home and hope to recover overnight. We'll see whether I sleep, but hopefully my exhaustion overrules my lungs and keeps me asleep so I can do all of this again tomorrow. Goodnight!

there's a little bit more that has to be said

Perhaps I shouldn't have gone to work today...my voice is still a wreck, and my cough appears at inopportune times. But on the whole, the day was good. I was going to get up early and write, but I reset my alarm for 7:30 (although I coughed more than I slept in those extra hours) and didn't get into the office until ten. Then I basically had meetings and talked all day long. My team had lunch at the Indian place on campus, where I was v. unwillingly vegetarian since they had lamb curry (the only meat I don't eat), but the chai made up for it.

Speaking of Indians, I saw Chandlord this afternoon, rather unexpectedly - she was sitting at my desk like she owned the place when I returned to my cube after a meeting, and she continued to squat there for a couple of hours this afternoon. It was lovely, if a bit odd, to see her amongst the people I usually see at work, but it was more on the lovely side - so much so that I wish she could join my team rather than working out in the hinterland like she currently does. But it's probably for the best that I'm the only one who can tell my team stories about what I get up to outside of work (but then, if they secretly read this blog, they basically know that I work all the time, with the occasional Adit-fueled bender to take the edge off).

sssanyway, I had meetings all afternoon, and my voice continued to disappear throughout. I was done with official meetings by five, but I had to talk to a coworker about a project after that, and that turned into a two-hour side conversation about work and life (which was good, both as a conversation and as a way to sit out the traffic that would have eaten my soul if I'd left at five). Then I grabbed supper on campus before driving home and talking to Terry.

And now, I must sleep if I have any hope of doing this all again tomorrow - goodnight!

another shot of whisky, can't stop looking at the door

My cough is reaching rather epic proportions. I actually feel totally fine otherwise, but the cough + the general lack of breath meant that I canceled on Alyssa this morning...after I'd already driven to work and made the choice not to shower this morning because I thought I'd be training with her. Oops. But the lack of a training session in the middle of the day meant that I was quite shockingly productive this morning - I didn't get much done on Rafe and Octavia because I wasn't really feeling it, but I did day job stuff that will hopefully make the rest of my week more sane.

I spent the afternoon in meetings, gradually sacrificing my voice to The Man, and then I did a bit more work before meeting up with Jen, Joann, and Jane for our friendship renewal dinner. We went to Paul Martin's, which was pretty nice; the San Antonio Shopping Center area is completely unrecognizable from what it was in our youth, since the Sears store has been replaced by this fancy steakhouse-type place. But it was a great place for us to catch up for a couple of hours, and to laugh at a bunch of memories (including how much of a mess I was at Jen's wedding - which is really par for the course with me at weddings, since I tend to get weepy and then get way into the party afterward). Also, Joann and I continue to discuss our spinster honeymoon, which is going to be the most decadent trip in the history of spinster honeymoons.

But that's a story for another time - I must go to bed immediately so I can do this all again tomorrow. Goodnight!

spending saturday night in your arms

Despite the fact that I'm getting the black lung, my three-day weekend was very nearly perfect. Today I continued my generally slothful peregrinations - I lazed in bed for quite awhile before eventually showering, making some eggs, and going to Rapha to drink hipster coffee and scribble in my notebook about Rafe and Octavia for awhile. I'm still not quite sure what to do about them, and I think a trip to Stanford library may be necessary sometime this week or weekend to check out some books about the time period and look for inspiration.

But they're a problem for another day. I eventually came home and talked to my parents (I know it's a Monday! but holiday weekends always throw me off), and there was much to catch up on - the death of one of their neighbors, the selling of the minicows, and other various and sundry updates. But eventually I had to part ways with them so that I could reconnect with the other family...

...and that started with tea and late-afternoon snacks with Claudia at Samovar. I beat her there by half an hour or so, so I did some more brainstorming over chai before she arrived. Then, we caught up on our generally ridiculous work situations and life situations while enjoying some lazy afternoon tea time. When we were done enjoying our tea, we adjourned up the hill to Adit and Priyanka's house, where we exchanged pleasantries for five or ten minutes before we all commenced working on our own projects like we were in a study hall instead of a social gathering. But that was fine by me, since I had many emails to answer (did I answer all of them? of course not.), and many research books to look up.

Eventually, though, we put away our work and met Katrina at Mama Ji's for family dinner (tm). It was one of the more ridiculous family dinners we've had in awhile (I know, I say they're all ridiculous, but that's not a lie) - everyone was in particularly fine form, and the conversation delved deeply and awkwardly into people's personal lives (as is appropriate for a family). My life was more of a focus than usual, but I successfully got out of my story and turned the spotlight on Katrina, who came v. close to flipping the table over to deflect attention (or to vent her displeasure). But it was all v. v. fun, with such pearls of wisdom from Priyanka as 'it sounds like everything has changed, or nothing has changed', and one of Adit's usual pronunciations that I'm in a complete regression (which is, frankly, way better than a local minima, so I'll take it).

In short, I'm #blessed. Goodnight!

but everything looks perfect from far away

Today was somewhat lowkey, but perhaps not as lowkey as it should have been to effect my recovery. I slept pretty well until sixish, at which point I woke up at started coughing...but then I found an expired inhaler from the last time I had bronchitis, took a couple of hits, and promptly went back to sleep again. I felt somewhat okay this morning - this cold has been odd in that it went from sore throat straight to cough without any sort of nasal congestion in between. I mean, I'm not sad that I missed the nasal stage, but the sore throat and cough could go away anytime now, thanks.

Anyway, I took care of some email stuff, took a shower, and eventually left the house at 11:30 to grab breakfast/lunch down the street, since I didn't feel like cooking anything. Then I rendezvoused for this afternoon's plans - Lauren (aka Subz) picked up me and Terry, and we went to San Gregorio/Half Moon Bay to hang out on the beach. San Gregorio was awesome - I hadn't been in years, but I used to go there a lot when I was at Stanford, and I miss the place. We walked quite a ways up the beach, and the weather was perfect for it. Then we drove back north of Half Moon Bay and went to Moss Beach Distillery, where we had drinks on the patio next to the fire pits before eating dinner upstairs as the sun set over the ocean.

So that was all quite idyllic - so idyllic that I immediately forgave Lauren when it became clear that she has the same illness that I have, although hers showed up a day earlier than mine, and it's possible she gave it to me at dinner on Tuesday. So I'm glad I didn't cancel hanging out with her today in an effort to not get her sick, since it would have been wasted martyrdom. But we all spent some quality time catching up on life, etc., and it was awesome to spend some time by the water.

I could have spent more time on the water tomorrow since I got an invite to go sailing, but I decided to be prudent and turn it down in the interest of continuing to recover - six or eight hours of water/wind + general debauchery would probably be the death of me. So instead, I crawled into bed at seven and watched 'Iron Man 2'. And now I'm going to sleep and hope my cough subsides tomorrow - goodnight!

back in black

Today was as slothish as it should have been, given that I'm trying to keep this cold from becoming something worse. I seem to be succeeding thus far; I've skipped a lot of the nasal congestion and have moved straight on to the 'black lung' phase, which will undoubtedly linger. But I slept for nine or ten hours last night, spent the morning lazing in bed, had some tea with Terry, and then lazed around some more.

I did leave the house eventually, since I was hungry and thought going outside might be a fun and interesting endeavor. So I went down the street and ate huevos rancheros, which helped - and the owner (Tony) brought them to my table and sat with me while I ate, which was as entertaining and delightful as always. Then I came home and did absolutely nothing for several more hours (okay, not nothing - I messed around on the internet and took a nap).

The evening was more of the same - I was going to order thai for supper, but my favorite place to order from (Osha on Union) apparently closed last week. WTF is going on with my favorite restaurants in the Marina?! So I ventured out again and ate some mexican food (vaguely mexican, vaguely decent - it's usually better, but the meat was a little overcooked for my liking). Then I came home and made the utterly unusual choice of watching a movie in bed, which I never do - but I watched 'Iron Man', since I've been meaning to binge watch the entire Marvel universe of movies and it seemed like there was no time better than tonight to start. I really enjoyed it, but that should surprise none of you. I think it came out around the time that I stopped going to the movies because my friends who see movies with me had all disappeared, so hopefully I can catch up at some point.

But now I'm going to sleep and hope I'm recovered enough tomorrow to enjoy my weekend - goodnight!

shaping up and shipping out

The illness that has been lingering on the edges of my body for the last week hit me today, fulfilling all my hypochondriac fears. Sadly, I had to go to Mountain View for my seven-minute presentation, but the drive down was fine (and I didn't leave home until eight), I got a decent breakfast and lunch for my troubles, and I drove Chandlord home with me at 1pm, so that was all just dandy. Then I sat at my desk at home and worked for a couple of hours before deciding that work wasn't helping my recovery.

So I sat on the couch, drank some coffee, and read a bit of a book on the many and varied languages of rural France in the period between the Ancien Regimé and WWI, as one does when one is sick. But I rallied to have dinner with Terry, which was good even if I wasn't feeling well enough to continue on to the birthday party she was going to.

And now, in deference to my sore throat and my advanced age, I'm going to bed - goodnight!

i sneezed on the beat and the beat got sicker

Alyssa tortured me this morning, so I'm excited to see how I feel tomorrow...she had me doing kettlebell windmills, which were the exact exercise that another trainer in the gym had mentioned on Tuesday when telling a story about how his friend showed up drunk at his apartment while the trainer was doing kettlebell windmills, picked up a far-too-heavy weight to mimic him, and dislocated his shoulder. Heh. However, the weight I was using wasn't too heavy, even if the whole exercise is slightly ridiculous.

sssanyway, I then went to work, where I had meetings basically all day and felt like I accomplished absolutely nothing. Then I abandoned the office a little after five p.m. to have dinner with Joann (of friendship renewal fame). We're planning an extravagant spinster honeymoon to the South Pacific (this is the plan I referenced a few weeks ago, which I was invited on because I'm single/fancy/like beaches), so we discussed destinations and dates over some delicious foodstuffs at Shell Shock. If all goes according to plan, it will be quite ridiculous, but I'm looking forward to ridiculous.

Now, though, I need to sleep; I have to drive to the south bay tomorrow to give a presentation in person that I've been allotted exactly seven minutes for because they won't let me videoconference in for it, and you can imagine how thrilled I am to be doing this. But I'm leaving the south bay and returning home as soon as I'm able so that I can stop working (on day job stuff) and spend the weekend relaxing/seeing friends/sleeping/brainstorming. Goodnight!

wanna put my tender heart in a blender

More of the same, more of the same. I got up super early, but I broke my vow and did work when I got to campus at 7:30 instead of writing (which I guess is also work), since I had meetings all day and several things that urgently needed to get done before that. But my work was accomplished in due course, and my meetings weren't all that onerous (and produced what may be my new favorite saying when someone, when I pressed for details on something was that he hadn't done yet, said 'it's in the cloud', which was neither true nor believable - sorry, that's probably not funny to you, but it was hilarious to me and another person in the meeting). And I had lunch with Heather (the Heather who used to work with me and Pete, not dear respected madam), whom I hadn't seen in like two years, and it was so great to catch up with her again.

Then I had more meetings, but I managed to get out of campus by 3:45 and into my apartment by five, which I'll totally take. And I did some brainstorming/journaling over wine and chicken skewers at my favorite greek place, which also helped me to relax since it's a decently-long stroll there and back. I should probably work tonight, but I'm refusing to fall back into my bad old habits (or, I'm totally a workaholic, but I'm trying not to let either job get too demanding compared to the other one), so I'm going to bed instead. Goodnight!

driver roll up the partition please

Eight hours of sleep isn't going to happen tonight if I don't go to bed immediately. But today was mostly good - I spent a stupid amount of time in my car, but I did a teensy bit of brainstorming before my 8:30am meeting, so at least there's that. Then I slogged all morning, snuck out to train with Alyssa (deadlifts and kettlebells, so we'll see if my back feels punished tomorrow), and then had meetings most of the afternoon. But one of the meetings involved a walk to the coffee place, so at least I got enough caffeine into my system to survive the torturous drive home...

...and I got back just in time to take care of ten minutes of stuff before going to dinner with Lauren (aka Subz). We met on Fillmore, and while the service was pretty terrible, the conversation was good and it was as great as it always is to catch up with her. But we parted ways relatively early because we're old, and now I'm going to sleep and hope that I can get to work in time to do some serious writing beforehand - goodnight!

don't act like i never told you

I successfully staved off illness for another day, but my goal tonight is to sleep for eight hours in hopes of pushing it forward another day. Or my goal should be to stop being a hypochondriac. Unclear.

sssanyway, today was a good start to the week - I made it into work by 7:30 and spent an hour brainstorming Rafe and Octavia before beginning the day job. I may be at the point where I need to pick some vague target and start writing toward it, knowing I'll have to rewrite some stuff - but the last book benefitted from having the semblance of a plot first, so maybe I should do a fake outline and then begin. Decisions, decisions. All I know is that I don't know very much about them, and there's something wrong with the setup (which I hope to god is not that they shouldn't be together, because I'm already committed there). But hopefully some more brainstorming this week will help.

Then the day job commenced with a gift of bacon from a coworker (funny how free bacon wins me over...but there was no meat in my building's cafe for some reason, so a delivery from another cafe was quite appreciated), followed by a series of meetings that were mostly good. I also had lunch and coffee with several coworkers, which was a good break from the meeting grind. And I left at 4:30, which wasn't totally optimal for traffic, but I rocked out to a 90s playlist and so didn't particularly care that I was sitting around doing nothing.

Once I got home, I ate some of last night's soup (even better the second day) while doing day job work and watching most of the national championship game with Terry. And now I shall sleep, and you shall hope that tomorrow is more interesting for all our sakes - goodnight!

i don't wanna be your hero

Today I canceled all my plans and embraced my inner hermit, because my inner hermit is worried that she's coming down with something dreadful and wanted to batten down the hatches. So I ate breakfast, ordered groceries instead of going to the grocery store, and cleaned my room instead of pursuing my original afternoon plan (hanging out/writing with Claude). I did get my nails done, since even my inner hermit is vain, but that was my only attempt at feigning normalcy, and I felt rather ill while I was doing it.

So I abandoned the other plan of the night (opera on tap, alas) and stayed home and made chicken tortilla soup (which was amazeballs, if I do say so myself, even though it took two hours). Claude ended up coming over, and so she and Terry and I ate the fruits of my labors while watching the Golden Globes. And now I'm going to sleep and hope that whatever I am getting is actually hypochondria and not the flu. Goodnight!

when you think of love do you think of pain

I had a lovely Saturday, thanks for asking! It helped that I slept for nine hours last night, which is a feat I hope to repeat tonight (although I'm less than optimistic, since last night I went to bed at nine and it was kind of a struggle to stay asleep this morning). But I got up in time to shower and walk down to Fort Mason to meet Kathia for a writing date. It wasn't as productive as it usually is; I basically spent the first hour texting and messing around with my phone, which was the opposite of productive, to the point that I apologized to Kathia for being a slacker even though it had little impact on her.

But I did do a bit a quality brainstorming, so I'll take it. Then I walked back to Union Street and had brunch at my favorite place, where Tony decided that I was 'Evil Sara' today because I sat at the bar, ordered something I've never ordered before (poached eggs on salmon with hollandaise, sans the baguette it's usually served on), and got oddly engrossed in the Kentucky/Texas A&M game. But Evil Sara and Tony had fun making fun of the other patrons, so that was all hilarious. Then I came home and spent some quality time cleaning my room...

...but I gave myself a break and went to a late afternoon showing of THE IMITATION GAME with Terry. This was a movie I was destined to see; while I've moved far away from my artificial intelligence roots, Turing remains a towering figure. Also, I've moved far away from my WWII history roots, but the Enigma codebreakers are still fascinating to me. The combination of both of them threatened to make my heart explode. Also, at some point in the future I need to stop writing historical romance and move on to any number of other types of stories (as Terry pointed out over dinner)....but that movement will not happen today.

Anyway, I thought the movie was totally awesome, and I highly recommend it. Of course, it was helped along by the bottle of wine we split, since we saw it at the Kabuki in the 21+ balcony area. After the movie, we had a quickish supper at Fresca, and then we came home, where I spent the last hour refreshing myself on what was factual in the movie and what was fictional.

Now, though, I must sleep so that I can be somewhat productive and also somewhat relaxed tomorrow - goodnight!

check me in and check me out

Today, like most days, is likely supremely uninteresting to you. I woke up around 6:30 and spent an hour or so making slides before driving to the glorious south bay to train with Alyssa. Unfortunately, traffic was suboptimal, and so I was fifteen minutes late; also unfortunately, I was weirdly tight and was having trouble with my form on the kettlebell snatches, but I think I survived. Then I went to work, showered, had a meeting to present the slides I'd made earlier, grabbed lunch, and then met a coworker for coffee to discuss some work stuff in a more congenial atmosphere than our cubes (although my flashing disco desk makes my cube v., v. congenial!).

But I was able to wrap everything up by two, and I promptly left to return to the evil city. Once here, I got my bangs trimmed and my brows waxed before coming home and taking a v. necessary nap. Terry and I then adjourned to dinner, which was a very long, very protracted sushi affair at the place around the corner, which makes excellent sushi v. slowly. Because of the (lack of) speed, I had two glasses of wine + most of Terry's second glass, so I came home in a lovely mood.

Now, though, sleep beckons - I'm meeting Kathia to write in the morning, and I have high hopes of getting my room into some semblance of order this weekend, so all that progress needs to happen. Goodnight!

this body is yours and mine

I stayed in San Francisco today, which was totally glorious. I stayed in bed until seven (I know, so decadent), and I still made it into the SF office by 8:30. Then I grabbed breakfast, got through a bunch of work, had meetings from 11-12:30, grabbed lunch, and then had a very lovely hour of coffee and catching up with Gyre (remember him?). I hadn't seen him in over a year, I realized - since before his fourth kid was born, and since she's thirteen months old now, that was quite awhile ago. Stupidly, we saw each other a lot more when I wasn't working, since we had a standing triweekly lunch on calendar for years...but since I rarely go into the SF office and he's based up here full-time rather than going to MTV, our paths never cross.

But we were really good friends back in the day, and I'm pleased to say it was just like old times. So we caught up on life and all its varied and ridiculous happenings, and while an hour wasn't enough, it was a great interlude. We had to part ways since we're both very important and had meetings to go to, but I survived my meetings without any serious drama. Then I left early to get a facial and repair the dryness caused by Iowa + air travel (or to just indulge my inner princess).

And then I rendezvoused with Kathia - we were going to write, but she was over it and I had no desire to actually do any more work, so we had dinner at Verbena. Kathia recently moved to Russian Hill, which is closer to me than her old place, and it's opened up a whole new world of coffee shops and restaurants on Polk Street that we never went to when the central location between us was somewhere in the Marina. It's stupid that I've never really spent much time on Polk Street since I live three blocks away from it, but the hill from Van Ness to Polk is just steep enough that going to the restaurants on Chestnut always seems easier (even if Chestnut is infested with bros).

But the food at Verbena was yummy, and seeing Kathia was good for my soul, as always. And now I'm going to pull a total octogenarian move and go to bed at nine so that I can get up at six and make slides before going to work - goodnight!

you appear to face a decision i know you fear

My body is completely unaccustomed to getting less than nine hours of sleep, so getting ~7 for the last three nights has been quite destructive. Luckily I'm working from the SF office tomorrow, mostly so I can sneak out and get a facial before having dinner with Kathia, and so I'm destined to get more sleep (if not better sleep...I think I need a new mattress).

But even though I'm super tired tonight, I had a decent enough day - I got to work in time to write for an hour over my latte, and my ideas were coming a bit better than the other day when I thought of making Octavia a woodworker, so that was good. Then I had a breakfast meeting, followed by some work time, followed by a team lunch at a new part of campus (verdict: food was good, conversation was ridic - I'm beginning to realize that while it's nice to be part of such a stable group, there's danger in everyone getting to know each other too well). I then had meetings straight from 1:30 to 5ish, did a bit of work, sat in traffic for a long time, and ate a frozen enchilada for dinner to cap off a whole day of sugar-rich attempts to stave off exhaustion (#protip: that never works).

Now, though, I must sleep and try to recover - goodnight!

you got me begging for thread

Today was v. similar to yesterday, all things considered. I left the apartment by 6:20, and so I was able to squeeze in forty minutes of coffee drinking / brainstorming (the priority of those should have been reversed, but Rafe and Octavia are in early days and I'm still totally lost as to what to do with them) before beginning my meetings for the day. I had quite a few of them, but not so many that I couldn't catch up on email while hanging out in the couch area. And while I'm only two days into the new year, they were two better days in a row than I had in most of November/December, so I'll take them.

But maybe they were better because I left again at ~4:30 and spent the evening being pretty quiet and hermity. I got home a little before six, and I intended to look up books about Napoleonic spies, but I got sidetracked by looking at flights to India and Tokyo - it looks like I might have to go to India/Tokyo for ten days, leaving approximately four days after I get back from spending a week in NYC in February, which pretty much screws my whole vow to travel less in 2015 since I'm going to be out of commission for most of February. Lol.

sssanyway, I didn't really care that much about booking a flight tonight, so I abandoned my laptop and grabbed dinner while reading a bit about the French/British/Spanish/Portuguese battles in the Iberian Peninsula in 1807(ish). But the book I'm reading is too heavy on battle tactics and too sparse on high jinks, and it's high jinks that might inspire me for Rafe's character rather than tales of incompetent generals ordering suicide charges up steep ravines. So I tried to find more books about spies and drew a big blank. This might require some quality time at Stanford library in the next couple of weeks, if I can coerce myself into spending an evening there when all I want to do is go to bed early.

Speaking of, I need to go to bed right now so I can repeat these wondrous feats tomorrow - goodnight!

said i broke your heart...but it hasn't happened yet

I had kind of told myself to stop complaining so much about the commute, and lo, the commute rewarded me with drives of less than an hour each way. Magic.

Of course, that magic came at a price; I woke up at 5:30 and was out the door by 6:15, and so I was able to put in some quality time with Rafe and Octavia at the coffee shop on campus before it was time for my meetings. I'm still figuring out what their deal is (I kid you not, I considered making Octavia a woodworker...a real woodworker, not even a double entendre for something sexual), and it's slow going, so I mostly sat and drank my latte and daydreamed and scribbled things like 'no orphans' in my notebook. Progress.

Progress was interrupted, however, when one of my coworkers showed up at the coffee place, and so we caught up post-holiday before grabbing breakfast and going to our building so I could make my nine a.m. meeting. When I got there, I discovered what some of my delightful coworkers had done to my desk over the holidays - and I actually am, oddly, totally delighted and not in any way thinking of retaliating. Dave (one of the guys on the German trip, whose desk I saran wrapped awhile ago) installed the equivalent of undercarriage lights under my desk, so there's now a soft, not-at-all-subtle glow oscillating between red, green, yellow, and blue at all times. He was eventually kind enough to give me the remote so I could control it myself, and I'm totally charmed - and my team has already voted that I should use it as a signal to them of my current mood (i.e. green = go, red = run for your life). Again, magic.

But not everything was magic - I had to work, after all, even though it was mostly desultory. And, I peaced out around 3:30 and did a totally ridiculous thing - apparently there's a truck that shows up on campus once a month with a dunk tank where you can get your body fat measured, so I did that. It was tres awkward, since it involved wearing a bathing suit and getting on my hands and knees in a tub full of water in a trailer with a single dude monitoring the situation, which all sounds like the start to a really low-budget porno (actually, I don't think it's sexy enough for porn - maybe it's the start to Saw XVII). Whatever. It was interesting, and a good baseline for me and Alyssa as she continues her nefarious kettlebell agenda...

And then I drove home, went to the gym (Alyssa is in Hawaii until the end of the week and has left me to my own devices...and like in Saw XVII, I'm apparently torturing myself now), took care of my own, less nefarious waxing agenda, and grabbed food on the way home. Then I hung out with Terry before realizing that I needed to go to bed immediately if I have any hope of recovering so I can do this all again tomorrow (sans crawling around in a bathtub with a stranger watching, hopefully). Goodnight!

that's a fine looking high horse

Vacation has abruptly come to an end, which I'm suddenly quite sad about. Today felt like a last breath before chaos strikes - I'm anticipating the next couple of weeks at work will be mostly ridic, given that it's the start of a new quarter and new year, and I also want to start writing Rafe and Octavia's story. But today was v. quiet. Perhaps too quiet - and I can blame that on the wine I had last night, which did no favors for my head this morning.

But I eventually rallied and met up with Claudia so that we could renew our love affair with Hong Kong Flower Lounge. Neither of us eat gluten anymore, but we took our chances with the rice noodle dishes (a far cry from the feasts of our youth, but better than nothing). It was lovely to catch up after the holidays, and the dim sum remains as good as always. I got home around 2:30, stared at my room in a stupor, and eventually finished unpacking and took care of a lot of laundry. Yes, I'm fascinating.

I stopped even that tentative attempt at progress to call my parents; we had nothing new to share since I just left home two days ago, but Sundays require calls regardless. Then I messed around a bit more before escaping the apartment and going to my favorite greek place for supper; if I hadn't left, I would have been tempted to take a nap, which would have wrecked me for tonight. So I ate some chicken and wrote in my journal while chatting up the bartender, and it was all a perfectly peaceful end to a quiet weekend.

But now, in anticipation for tomorrow, I'm going to read a bit and go to sleep early - wish me luck that the next quarter at work is better than the previous one. Goodnight!

oh christ she's not alone

I have returned to my hedonistic San Francisco lifestyle, where 45 degrees is considered cold and my veins are well-lubricated by red wine. I slept as much as I could this morning (which wasn't quite enough), then got up and took care of some tings before showering and going down the street for breakfast and a reunion with Tony, the owner of my favorite breakfast place. Tony and breakfast were both great, thanks for asking!

Then I came home, talked to Terry for awhile (this was our first rendezvous of 2015!), and spent a couple of hours procrastinating, doing laundry, etc. Then I ventured to Polk Street and bought lingerie at the French lingerie store (okay, it was only three bras, and they were mostly basic, but still, this is far more decadent than anything one can find in my home town, unless the used goods store has started carrying French lingerie). And then I went to Des Amis for one final hurrah - as I mentioned the other night, they're closing for good tomorrow, which makes me tres sad.

However, my tres sadness turned into tres drunkenness, since I had four glasses of wine to see them out in style. The first was on my own; the second and third were with Terry when she joined me there; and the fourth was provided compliments of the restaurant, who in my mind didn't apologize nearly enough for leaving me. C'est la vie, as they say.

Having left them in style, I came home, took a seventeen-minute nap that was all that stood between me and certain death, and then smeared some eyeliner on my face in an attempt to look glamorous before going to Kathia's new place for a combo cocktail party/housewarming. It was lovely to see her, although our mingling was brief; I spent most of the night hanging out with Josie, who also writes, and she gave me some life-coach type lessons that were by turns illuminating and hysterical.

But because I had been at Des Amis, and because I'm not over my jetlag yet, and because I have high hopes for being a productive member of society tomorrow (or at least going to the gym), I left the party relatively early, and I'm going to go to sleep immediately (or after I get rid of the eyeliner I smeared on my face earlier) - goodnight!

does this mean you're moving on

I am in my bed in San Francisco, having survived an utterly uneventful pair of flights from Des Moines to Denver and Denver to San Francisco. Today's travel was very nearly civilized...there were only two people ahead of me at security in Des Moines, I was upgraded on both flights, I had ample time between flights (so much time that I got my boots shined!), and since I was traveling with only a carry-on, I was able to saunter out of the airport immediately upon arrival. If only it were always so simple...

The rest of my day was also lovely. I spent one last morning luxuriating in complete sloth, although I caught the tail end of my parents' breakfast and so made myself some eggs to go with the bacon I stole from them. Then I packed, showered, and generally hung out until it was time to leave for the airport. We got to Des Moines early so we could have supper at our usual restaurant before they kicked me off at the airport curb, where we said our farewells.

And now, I'm going to sleep; I slept almost all the way from Denver to SF, so I'm hoping that + whatever sleep I get tonight will be sufficient without totally wrecking the glow I've got going from ten days of nine hours of sleep a night. But I've got big plans for the weekend, and those plans require me to get out of bed at some point, so getting at least some sleep now is imperative. Goodnight!

from the balcony you call my name

Tonight's my last night in ye olde Iowa for awhile. I'm not precisely ready to leave, and I'm certainly not ready to go back to work. But I am looking forward to getting back into the writing routine, if nothing else - Rafe and Octavia are beginning to shimmer in my head a bit more, trying to lure me into writing them. Yeah, I know that's crazy, but it's true.

So today was my last chance at sloth, and I fucking owned it. I stayed in bed late, went upstairs when the desire for bacon and coffee overcame my desire for sleep, and hung out with the parents. I also did some desultory tasks on my laptop while talking to them, because I have difficulty being truly slothful, but none of it was particularly crazy. Then I showered and went into town with [censored] to visit our grandmother, which was a mostly-depressing experience (except for imagining her playing kickball, which is entertaining, and also hearing her claim that she used to walk over to the swimming pool to swim, which is certainly not true). But she's in a good place and is well cared-for, which is the best you can hope for.

Then [censored] kidnapped me to show me [censored] before returning me to the safety of our house. Once here, I messed around on my laptop a bit more before dinner, and then enjoyed bratwurst while scowling at the over-the-top ridiculousness that is 'Inside Edition', which plays on the CBS affiliate here every night at 6:30 (just in time to spike my rage and ensure I eat the extra helping of whatever to avoid throwing my plate at the screen). Then we watched a bit of tv before playing hearts - we hadn't really played games over this break, but we managed to get in one game of hearts before bedtime. [censored] won at the last minute, much to my chagrin, but it was fun regardless.

And now, after having spent part of my New Year's Day reading more about that book on willpower like a fucking stereotype, I'm going to sleep - goodnight!

every little thing she does is magic

Happy new year!

Today was a quiet, easy slide into 2015. You can probably guess that I slept for nine hours. Then I spent the afternoon taking care of various tings, such as packing up a couple of boxes to send to California (but they won't ship until Friday, since UPS wasn't picking up ground packages, per the phone call my dad made to his UPS driver (whom he of course has on speed dial, because why not)). I also bought a variety of foreign currencies from my dad, which was fun. It was also timely, since I got an invitation to a fun activity from someone who described me as 'single, fancy, and likes beaches', which should probably be my new tagline on every social media site ever. And that fun activity, if it materializes, will require foreign currency, so yay for that (and so much for my vow to travel less in 2015 - but we all knew that resolution was going to fail, right?).

Eventually I did a kettlebell workout in my room, and I showered just in time for supper, which Katie would be pleased to know was ham and bean soup (with gluten free cornbread muffins in deference to the discovery that at least half of us should never eat gluten again). Then I spent the evening drinking a couple of hard apple ciders and watching new year's coverage with my mom (and with the occasional accompaniment of my dad's snores). I could have watched with people closer to my own age, since a couple of [censored]'s friends came over, but I left the young'uns to their own devices.

All in all, 2014 was a pretty crazy year globally, which affected my mood somewhat because I spend too much time on social media - but for me, it was mostly sweet, with some stresses that were almost entirely self-inflicted (or externally inflicted, but exacerbated by my tendency to overanalyze everything to death). So, as per usual, I want to be kinder to myself next year - and while that's something I've said before, I feel closer to it this year than I have in the past. Yes, there is always hope*.

I hope you've all had a lovely and happy new year's eve, and I look forward to sharing more of my inane ramblings with all of you lurkers in 2015! Goodnight!


*or not always hope - I found out from Katrina that Des Amis is shutting down this weekend, which has rocked my world to its foundations. but I think I'll survive. maybe.