she's holding her tonic like a cross

I think my brain has melted. This is an unfortunate situation, since I must think during every active moment of the day for the next few weeks if I'm going to stay on top of my many games. Today was brutal, though; I met Kathia for a writing date at seven (okay, I showed up at 7:20), wrote until 8:30, and then caught a v. nausea-inducing bus to Mountain View, which deposited me at 10:15. Then I had a string of meetings and tasks all afternoon, which was quite painful, but I got out of there at 5:50 to catch another nausea-inducing bus back to the city. The commute is not my friend, and I am reminded that I'm happier when I drive even if I have theoretically less chance to work (although since I can't work anyway, it doesn't really matter).

So I got to the city at 7:15, and then met up with a girl who may do some marketing/promo stuff for me (or, rather, for my alter ego). She seemed really smart and cool, but I was a little braindead since I had just woken up from a nausea-avoiding nap and didn't really wake up until halfway into our meeting, at which point she probably already thought that I was a lost cause. But we're going to talk again next week, so hopefully this will work out. Then I went to Roam for a burger and ended up writing over truffle fries and a glass of wine for close to two hours, which means that I finished writing a new first chapter for Alex and Prudence. I have grand plans to get up at 5:30 tomorrow and read through it one more time before sending it off to my editor (and then training with Alyssa), but this grand plan already sounds like a bad idea.

But I'm too tired to edit it tonight, particularly after getting home and dealing with a day job issue, so I think I'll go to bed instead and hope for the best tomorrow. Goodnight!

no sugar tonight

You get another boring blog post because I had another boring day - actually, it was a heavily productive, interesting day, but none of it is of interest to you. I woke up early, wrote for a couple of hours, did some day job stuff, trained with Alyssa, and then was in the office from one to six-thirty. Then I grabbed some coffee with the intention of writing some more, but that was a failure. Then I came home and tried to write again, but it was still a failure, so I'm throwing in the towel. Tomorrow is another day, though - one that will start with a writing date at seven a.m., since I'm bound and determined to finish this book no matter how many friends I lose or how many people I leave dead and bloodied along the way [yes, that's a Zoolander quote]. And on that note, goodnight!

we are all just runaways

I had meant to write tonight, but I'm too tired, so I'm going to go to bed and hit it hard before work. I did the same this morning - I met Kathia at 7:15 and wrote until 9:30, when it was time to speed down to the office. This was actually a v. good plan, since I avoided all traffic, put in a full day of work, left at 6:30, ate some Chipotle, and avoided traffic on the way back as well. If I could get out of having morning meetings I would do this every day, but unfortunately it's not possible.

However, I'm going to try to write again tomorrow, so wish me luck. And that, sadly, is all I have to say - all work and no play, etc. Goodnight!

maybe i'm a different breed

First, I must say that I wasn't drunk last night - I was typing on my tablet because I didn't feel like getting out of bed to get my laptop, and I didn't realize how many typos I'd created. Oops. sssanyway, today was another writing odyssey, or at least the morning was; I met up with Kathia in North Beach at 9:30 and wrote for a couple of hours, which was excellent. I'm feeling good about where I am, although I need to work all week when I'm not at the day job to meet my current goals. After that, I walked back to the Marina, had lunch (huevos) down the street, and didn't get shot in whatever shootout happened on Chestnut Street, since I luckily had decided not to go down there as I had previously considered.

I spent an hour or so procrastinating after that, then had a ninety-minute massage, which did wonders for me. Then I talked to my parents, who were in good form as usual. After that, Terry and I had dinner at Nettie's, since I was craving fish tacos - and we were v. sad to learn that they're going out of business at the end of the year, no doubt because having a restaurant in San Francisco is not a great proposition unless you're totally full every night. Then we came home and I worked on a variety of administrative tasks while watching "Project Runway".

But that's all boring. This tidbit isn't: I found out that the Russian version of HEIRESS is now available! I hadn't heard that it had been released, but I started getting the occasional hit for my name in Russian on zee romance blog, so I started searching. And I found this: http://www.labirint.ru/books/411681/. Isn't the cover gorgeous? I can't read Russian, but I can understand just enough to tell that the first chapter sample is indeed the first chapter of my book. They've retitled it something that translates to 'Forbidden Pleasures', but that's to be expected; Madeleine and Ferguson still have the same names (Мадлен and Фергюсон), so that's cool.

So that's my exciting news for the day. And now I must go to sleep since I have to get up for a writing date before going to work - goodnight!

you're giving me such sweet nothing

The writing is going shockingly well - I keep waiting for it all to go sideways, but thus far I'm on track. I was, v uncharacteristically, out the door this morning before Terry was, since I had a writing date with Kathia at 8:30. I wrote very diligently for two hours, then abandoned Kathia and my laptop to go to a museum with Chandlord.

The museum was the deYoung, and the exhibit was a retrospective of Bulgari jewelry from the '60s to the'90s. Some of it was truly hideous, in keeping with the times, but there were some gorgeous trembnlant brooches in diamond and platinum that I would wear m if I had a) the occasion aand b) the funds. And I found myself in love with the emeralds in the collection, which makes it somewhat likely that someone in one of my boss will get some fabulous emeralds at some point.

After that, Chandlord and I found an ice cream truck with the usual artisanal soft serve (okay, only usual in San Francisco and probably Portland). Then I dropprd her off, took a nap, took a shoGoodnighhtet Kathia at a wine bar for another marathon writing session. I accomplished way more than I deserved since I was quite distracted by all the marina kids in their stupid must-get-drunk-at-5 kind of life. I eventually left, had dinner with Terry, read a magazine, and realized my body is now trying to sleep. And I shall let it - I have another writing date tomorrow and I want the end to be in sight before I go back to the editor. Goodnight!

i push the trigger and i pull the thread

Today was utterly lovely, as productive days that end in steak always are. I woke up, showered, put on yoga pants, and went to the office, where I claimed that my yoga pants and fingerless gloves were my Halloween costume and that I had dressed as a romance writer. Yes, I'm lazy. But I got a lot of random stuff done, which was good. Then I left around 2:00 to beat traffic (but not enough, since the approach to the city was a standstill), got home, checked email, did a bit more stuff, changed into a dress and redid my makeup, and then met up with Kathia at a cafe down the street. We wrote for some time before being joined by Terry, who is on probation until we determine whether her work style meshes with ours. Yes, this sounds harsh, but there are few people whom I can meet up with at a cafe and work with, and the need for productivity right now forsakes all bonds of fellowship (yes, that's a Lord of the Rings quote).

Anyway, we wrote at Rapha, then adjourned to the wine bar across the street and wrote some more. All told it was about three and a half hours, and I feel great about what I got done - I probably wrote ten or fifteen pages and edited another five or ten. Then Terry went to a party and Kathia and I had dinner, which consisted of prime rib and a whole vat of wine. Her husband joined us, which was lovely, and a great time was had by all.

But now I really must sleep, since I have grand plans to write in the morning - goodnight!

heading for the open road

I meant to go to bed an hour ago, but I started messing around online and that was the end of me. Today was pretty good, despite my ridiculous headache; I trained with Alyssa, made it into the office by ten, had some really productive meetings, had lunch with Alaska Matt, and got down to <20 emails in my work inbox (my personal inboxes have abandoned all hope). And I spent some serious quality time talking to Heather (aka dear respected madam) in her car like the sketchy people we are; we were supposed to have dinner, but she canceled because her stomach hurt, but then she stopped by my building and we talked almost as long as we would have talked at a restaurant. The only downside was that I didn't get fed, so I had to survive a v. unexpectedly unpleasant shuttle ride home by eating some string cheese and taking a nap.

But now, I must sleep so that I can go to work, get done everything I need to get done, and leave so I can write a million words this weekend. Goodnight!

i've wasted my nights, you've turned out the lights

Today was somehow v. productive, v. social, and v. frustrating all at once - I think my head is about to explode from trying to manage it all. Or maybe my head is about to explode because I'm on the knife-edge of getting sick - nothing feels quite right, and I keep losing my train of thought in a most uncharacteristic way. But I'm hoping that I can be in bed in ten minutes and get eight hours of sleep (the math doesn't add up, unfortunately).

sssanyway, I got up at 6:15, caught the 7:15 shuttle, and regretted that I had taken the time to dry my hair since that shuttle took an hour and forty minutes to get to the office. Ugh, nightmare. I had meetings almost straight through all day, and the bits of time that had originally been free got filled with impromptu conversations with people. So that was all good, although I didn't answer any email or do anything else worth noting.

But I held true to my goal of leaving at four so that I could get back to the city for a writing date. And I happened to run into Chandlord at the shuttle stop, so we sat together and talked all the way back, which probably means that someone is going to find a way to get us fired, since talking on the shuttle is the biggest faux pas known to man. She made some excellent jhokes, though, including one with a guidebook that cannot be recreated in a way that will give you satisfaction - so if I get fired, it was worth it. I made it to the city at 5:30, and I got off at the stop after my own so that I could meet up with Kathia for a writing date. On my way to the date, I stopped in at Benefit and got them to put mascara on me, since I somehow forgot to put mascara on this morning - total amateur move that left me ashamed all day.

But the ladies at Benefit rectified my tragic situation, and so I was able to walk into the cocktail bar with my head held high. Kathia and I wrote for almost two hours, which was v. necessary; I rewrote most of a scene and I think I'm happy with the results. Then we parted company and I met up with Terry and Lauren (aka Subz) at A16 to have a v. v. belated birthday celebration for Lauren. Her birthday was in August, but we hadn't formally recognized it, so the three of us had dinner and a much-needed catchup (since I hadn't seen Lauren since our infamous drink-fest to celebrate Terry's birthday six weeks ago).

And now, I'm falling asleep and must get up early to train with Alyssa at eight a.m. Ugh. Goodnight!

i hope you fall in love and it hurts so bad

I'm wiped out tonight - I think I've avoided the cold that I was in the midst of getting, but I'm not sure I'm totally out of the woods. It doesn't help that everyone on my team is sick - the odds aren't good. Yes, I'm a hypochondriac.

But I may also be wiped out because I got up at 6:15 and wrote for an hour before my 8am meeting - a very strange and surreal development, since I dislike mornings, but it was really great to feel like I'd already done some writing for the day before the sun even came up. Then I worked from home for two hours, went to Palo Alto and trained with Alyssa, showered, and got to work in time for lunch. Then I worked the rest of the afternoon in a somewhat desultory fashion, since it was mostly meetings and catching up with teammates, none of which was particularly taxing.

I left the office at 6:15 with grand plans to write, but I was starving, so I went to Palo Alto first and had a salad at Sprout. While there, I made the horrific discovery that Miyake Sushi is no more - that favorite disgusting sushi haunt of Stanford students has been replaced by an upscale steakhouse. Palo Alto really has gone to the venture capital dogs. After eating salad, I walked to Philz with the intention of writing there, but the tables were all taken and I was suddenly exhausted. So I got a coffee, drove home, talked to Terry for a few moments, took care of a couple of tings, and am now going to go to bed so I can repeat this all tomorrow. Goodnight!

some nights

I stayed home from work today. I was probably more productive than I would have been if I had gone into the office, but it still wasn't great; I'm tired and achey, and I had a raging headache. But my cough is still subtle and I only sneezed a few times, so I'm hoping that I've staved off the worst of whatever this is. We shall see, we shall see.

But since I was a total hermit and nothing exciting happened, I have nothing to report. Goodnight!

how can we be lovers if we can't be friends

I'm on the very knife-edge of a cold. I can feel it beginning behind my eyes, and also nestling somewhere in the vicinity of my tonsils. I was so fucking close to reentering my regular life after a glorious trip abroad without coming down with a cold, but if this progresses, I will have failed just as it seemed that victory was within my grasp. I suppose that's suitably French of me, but I would have preferred to stay healthy.

So, today wasn't nearly as productive as I had hoped; I worked pretty steadily this morning, at least after I got out of bed and showered (which could have happened much earlier, since I woke up at five and should have just gotten up rather than lazing around in bed until seven or eight). I also talked to Terry, whom I hadn't spoken to in any detail since getting back from Paris, so that was nice. But sometime after noon I started to take a turn for the worse, and by three I really wasn't feeling well. So I cuddled up in bed, talked to my mom, looked for soup recipes, and then schlepped myself a few blocks down the street to pick up the ingredients for said soup.

The soup turned out to be quite lovely, and will probably be even better tomorrow - it's a roasted garlic soup with chicken and cream, and it was delish. Also, the whole house and my whole body probably smell like garlic - it called for roasting twenty cloves of garlic, and then adding another ten cloves of fresh garlic to the soup along with the roasted stuff. But it was warm and soothing and gluten-free, which was exactly what I wanted. So I ate the soup while watching some football with Terry, and now I'm going to go to bed even though it's not quite 9:30 so that I can sleep for a million hours and then make a gametime decision about whether to go to the office or whether to stay home and nurse my sadness. Goodnight!

did I play my song too loud

I am suddenly way too tired to blog or do anything else - I'm in the midst of edits, and I'm still jetlagged, so my mind is quickly turning to mush. I need to conserve words if I'm going to be at all useful tomorrow, so this is all you're getting from me- goodnight!

kiss me like it's do or die

I had grand plans to write tonight, but I'm so jetlagged and tired that I'm going to go to bed instead. Today was utterly uneventful; I took the shuttle (and read on it, which worked really well) to the airport, and then I slogged all morning until it was time to have lunch with Gyre (whom I haven't seen since April) and Lizzie (who quit years ago and is now studying up in Seattle). It was great to see them, even if I was reminded that Gyre and I have done a terrible job staying in touch for meals and things. C'est la vie, I suppose.

I eventually left the office and sat in traffic forever, then got my bangs trimmed and my eyebrows waxed. I also picked up groceries, although I was too wiped out to make anything tonight. And now, I'm going to go to bed before I type anything truly embarrassing, and I shall hope that I remember all my great ideas tomorrow. Goodnight!

the lion sleeps tonight

Apologies for not blogging last night - I had a v. long, v. uneventful flight back to SFO after a couple of miserably inefficient hours at Charles de Gaulle, and I thought I was doing great until I suddenly, irrevocably crashed. So I went to bed at 7:30pm and didn't wake up until six (with one brief five-minute awakening around one). That amount of sleep was apparently v. necessary, and I'm hoping it helps to stave off the cold I'll probably pick up now that I'm back in the petrie dish that is my office.

But today was a weird, soft reentry into work; I got up at six, went down to the south bay to train with Alyssa at eight, and then made it to the office just in time to leave again. My team had an offsite planned at the Monterrey Aquarium, so we took a bus down there, ate lunch overlooking the water, and then wandered around the aquarium. We left down there at 2:30, and I then spent 3.5 hours on a bus - first to get back to Mountain View, then to get to the city. Bleh. All told I spent about six hours either on a bus or in my car today, which wasn't really pleasant. But the aquarium was nice and it was great to have a day of official work that didn't involve me opening my laptop.

And now I desperately need to sleep - someone was coughing all the way home on the shuttle, and I'm convinced I'll get pneumonia if I don't sleep it off. Goodnight!

it's either sadness or euphoria

I am ready to go home, I suppose, but only because I feel like I have to be. I had a brief, vivid moment this afternoon where I had a visceral urge to throw my cellphone into the Seine and run away forever, but I have somehow survived.

In short, today was dreamy in its perfection. I slept in a bit, choosing to skip Kathia and Terry's rendezvous at the Musee d'Orsay, and then wandered down toward the Tuileries and the Louvre with no intention of going into the museum and every intention of taking pictures of whatever outdoor features struck my fancy. Then I rendezvoused with my friends, and we made a v. fortuitous decision to go stand in the lunch line for Le Comptoir, which we had been trying to get into throughout our entire time in Paris. I was fueled by the desire to sit outside with the blankets draped over all the seats that were embroidered with the figure of a pig, and Kathia and Terry were motivated by the food - and we all won.

I've had some fabulous meals on this trip, and I think that the Basque pig dish at Glou on Sunday is still the winner for best dish - but for best meal overall, Le Comptoir may have beat it. We started with a charcuterie plate, a cheese plate, and a dish of mushrooms with foie gras - omg, delicious. The ham on the charcuterie plate was the best thing ever - except for the fried pig skins, which were also the best thing ever. But then they were topped by the entrees - we had a beef (bouef) dish that would have been the winner in any other setting, but it was blown out of the water by this pork dish that I can't describe but was truly orgasmic. I was apparently flushed and clearly aroused throughout this meal, and the waiters got the point when Kathia and I both snapped at them at any attempt to clear our plates. But the waiter was oddly charmed when I draped the blanket over my chest like a shawl and declared myself queen of Le Comptoir, so I think we made some friends. We ended it with a perfect chocolate pot de creme and some coffee, and I wanted to die from happiness.

After that, we were going to go write, but when we got to the place we were going to, Kathia and I had both hit the wall so hard from the dying breaths of our aroused adrenaline rush that we said goodbye to Terry and came back to the hotel to take naps. I didn't sleep as much as Kathia did since I had a romance writer task to take care of, which was super annoying - but I did get a nap, which was super necessary. Then we met up with Terry at a cute little wine/bookstore, where we had three different pichets of wine across the three of us and generally admired everything about Paris. Then we went back to Glou on a whim and had charcuterie, beef, cheese, and dessert - it wasn't as perfect as Sunday, but it was the perfect denoument. We finished with a walk along the Seine, and now I should sleep - our flight is at ten tomorrow, which means I must get up far earlier than I would like. The real world awaits, but for now, I can wish you bonsoir!

you want to party in france?

I continue to be in miraculously perfect health, and so today was yet another delight. Kathia and I woke up sometime before eight and proceeded to the Cafe du St Denis on Ile-de-St-Louis, where I had an omelette du fromage (cheese and more cheese) and we both attempted to write. The attempt was mostly successful, although I still hate Prudence (although Kathia told me I need to adjust my attitude, which is probably correct). We ordered some morning champagne to try to help things along, which I suppose was a good idea, although I think I should probably drink some water at some point while on French soil. Terry met up with us there, and we adjourned to do some much-deserved (not-at-all-deserved) shopping in the Marais.

And thus began my pretty-much-perfect day. Kathia has even more of a weakness for lingerie than I do, and we stumbled upon a great lingerie store where we all spent far too much money on unmentionables. This was en route to the street that I had read about where three or four amazing stationery stores lived - and when I got there, I was so overwhelmed by the window displays that I didn't want to go into any of them. We went into one and I bought a new journal, but I held off on buying more because the other amazing one didn't open until two. So we adjourned to a nearby cafe and had steak and red wine, which was amazing. Then we went back to the stationery stores, I explored the other store, and then went back to the original store and bought three more notebooks.

My heaven should have been complete at that point, but there was more in store; we went to St. Germain and had tea at Mariages Freres, which is a grand French tea establishment founded in 1854 that has six hundred varieties of tea available. The tea list is on a placard, but each tea is explained in more detail in a novel-sized paperback book that comes with the menu. We got three teas, each better than the last, and a tea-infused creme brulee that was tastier than anything should rightfully be. Kathia and Terry also got scones, but I turned my nose up at the flour and instead just had a bite of butter and jam (which is the whole point of scones anyway). Kathia and I wrote a bit more there, but then we adjourned to the hotel so that I could take a nap - at that point I was like an overstimulated toddler at Disneyland whose every childish dream has come true, and I needed to sleep before I had a meltdown.

But I was properly revived by 6:45, so I put on a party dress and we went out to meet a couple of my coworkers who also chose to come to Paris after last week's book fair. We had a v. lovely dinner at Le Petit Chatelet, which is next to Shakespeare and Company (the famous English-language bookstore). I didn't have high hopes since it looked touristy from the outside, but our appetizers were delicious (and I gorged on foie gras, which is illegal in California, much to the shock and horror of our waiter) and the entrees were all delectable. It may shock you to know that I ordered chicken, but the chicken was awesome and I have no regrets.

We all parted ways at eleven, and then Kathia, Terry and I had a nightcap in the hotel lobby. And now I must go to bed. Paris has thus far been pretty much perfect, so I don't know whether to look forward to my last full day tomorrow with anticipation or dread - it doesn't seem like it can get better, and yet it doesn't seem likely that it will be worse. Either way, I will blog tomorrow unless my heart explodes tonight from happiness. Bonne nuit!

when the last king of hollywood shatters his glass on the floor

I had the very best day today - Paris is truly a moveable feast, particularly when you a) don't have pneumonia and b) know that you can't eat gluten, which means c) I felt vibrant and alive rather than deathly ill like on my previous trips. It was brisk and chilly most of the day, but the sun was out and everything was tres chic. Kathia and I met Terry at the cafe across from the hotel, where we had a perfectly acceptable omelette to keep me from gnawing off my own flesh as I would have done if they had gone out for croissants. Then we wandered through the streets and alleys of Paris and did some window shopping - it could have quite easily turned into real shopping, but the shops we admired were all closed. We stopped for Champagne at Les Deux Magots in St. Germain, which is famous for being the cafe where Hemingway, Beauvoir, Sartre, Camus and others used to hang out. The old man next to us was busy telling his companion that it was rude to order Champagne as we ordered our bubbly, and he likely thought it was even ruder that we were taking photos and tweeting, but c'est la vie.

We then continued our peregrinations to the Jardin du Luxembourg, a v. lovely park with all sorts of trees and flowers. I was on the hunt for great statues to take pictures of, since I'm still researching the not-so-secret non-gargoyle young adult book - and today was awesome for inspiration, to the point that I want to promptly go off the grid and write both this book and the next romance at the same time. It won't happen, but I can dream. After the jardin, we were feeling a bit parched since we hadn't had a drink in an hour - so we stopped at some cafe that looked so-so from the outside but was incredible on the inside. It had four floors of extravagant tables and decorations and carpets and the like, and we had red wine and v. delicious steak frites.

Thus properly nourished, we parted ways; Kathia and I went back to the hotel to take naps, while Terry went for a run (foolish choice). I only slept for forty minutes, and then went down to the hotel bar and drank tea and wrote for an hour, which was v. necessary. Then Terry came back, and she and I brainstormed Prudence for a bit before I retrieved Kathia. We wandered around the Marais, stopping at some charming but odd little bar for wine and charcuterie/fromage (the meat and cheese were fine, but not as good as last night, but the wine was quite tasty). Then we window shopped some more before stumbling across a restaurant called Glou, which we decided we had to eat at based solely on the fact that the inside smelled v. deliciously of truffles. So we sat outside drinking some gorgeous red wine from Languedoc and playing with an overly enthusiastic dog until our table was ready.

And it was all simply fantastic. I had a dish that I can't describe and will never have again, which gave me a profound, ineffable sense of sadness because it was one of the most delicious things I've ever had. The name was 'boudin du pays Basque', and it was essentially some sort of chopped/reconstructed sausage patty, cooked to a delectably caramelized char on the outside and perfectly seasoned internally. It looked horrible, so I didn't take a picture, but it gave me the happiest sense of wonder I've had over food in a long time. And the mashed potatoes with it were nearly as good, if more pedestrian. Combined with the wine (and the good company, of course, although I kind of forgot about them), it was a meal I hope I never forget. In fact, I hope that if I have dementia someday, my grandkids get sick of hearing me say 'Sausage? Did I tell you about the time I had this most amazing sausage in Paris?' Yes, that's a buzzkill.

After dinner, we sat around and drank coffee and talked some more, then wandered back to our hotel, saying goodbye to Terry along the way. And now I shall go to bed - Kathia and I have grand plans to write in the morning before we pursue other Parisian adventures, and I want to accomplish many tings. Bonsoir!

i hope that you don't suffer

Hello, Paris! As much fun as I had in Frankfurt, I'm v. glad to be on vacation, and even gladder to be in Paris. I managed to escape the book fair without picking up a cold, so I guess my suitcase full of holistic medicines protected me - I'm sure I'll get sick as soon as I get home, but as long as I'm able to enjoy Paris, I don't care. This morning was uneventful; I woke up, showered, finished packing, had one final amazing omelette, and got to the train station embarrassingly early for my trip to Paris. The train ride was uneventful, and I managed to do just a bit of writing when I wasn't inadvertently napping or staring out the window at the gorgeous countryside.

Upon arrival in Paris, I took a cab to my hotel, where I rendezvoused with Kathia, who had arrived yesterday. She was about to use the sauna, which I had no interest in, so I went out for a belated lunch of steak and red wine (lunch (and breakfast, and dinner) of champions) and did some totally awesome people watching. Then I came back to the hotel, found Kathia again, and then met up with Terry, who arrived from London this afternoon. The three of us wandered around for a few hours, including some time taking pictures of Notre Dame (yes, I'm researching the secret non-gargoyle young adult book), and more importantly including some time at a cute little wine bar, where we had red wine and charcuterie/cheese. Then we went for dinner at a restaurant we'd seen earlier, and it totally surprised us - the outside had purple patio furniture, leading me to believe the inside would be tres chic, but instead it was a throwback to a gothic mansion, with a lot of heavy wood furniture and crypt-like walls. This was topped off by a waiter who hummed to himself the entire night and a preternaturally young-looking couple in the corner who may have been vampires. Needless to say, I was in alt (which, perhaps is needful to say, is a Regency phrase for something along the lines of high-flyingly-ecstatic to the point of unseemly excitement).

After dinner, Terry went off to find her airbnb, and Kathia and I had cocktails and talked writing shop in the hotel bar. And now I'm all cozy and eager for bed - bonsoir!

but you never really had a doubt

I meant to go to bed a million hours ago, but I have no regrets. Unless, of course, I wake up with pneumonia in the morning, in which case I will hate myself. But I had a totally lovely day - I slept well, had a ridiculously nice breakfast, went to the book fair, accomplished some great tings, hung out with coworkers, and explored the little shops set up in one of the many vast courtyards, where someone convinced me to buy earrings as a souvenir of Frankfurt. I was back at the hotel by five, and I succeeded in packing everything up, leaving me just enough time to walk twenty minutes each way to the nearest Starbucks so that I could find a Frankfurt mug (I succeeded).

When I got back to the hotel, I thought I was going to have a quiet dinner with one of my coworkers at the hotel, but we ran into all the people who were meeting up to go out, and we got dragged along with them. It turned out to be quite lovely; I talked to some people I hadn't had a chance to catch up with yet, and I had a delicious steak and some great red wine, so that was all nice. Then I got dragged even further into the night and ended up at Spritzerhaus, some really divey bar where there was a live band covering American/British rock (and smoking while they sang/drummed, which was v. unexpected). I lasted for about five songs, but then another girl and I bailed since we both have early travel plans tomorrow.

And that means I should really sleep - I'm only going to get six hours now, which is better than nothing but not really enough. Still, my time in Germany has been incredible, and I'm sad that it's over. But I can't really be sad when I'm off to Paris in the morning - yes, life is hard. Goodnight!

got emotions that'll make it last

I don't want this book fair to ever end, but I also don't want to wait any longer to go to Paris...conundrum. Tomorrow is my last day in Frankfurt, and today was pretty smashing even if my wristband says I walked almost nine miles - I think I believe it. I had to be at my company's booth by nine a.m., which was pretty wretched, but my morning was mostly fun and not at all taxing, so it was kind of nice to hang out with coworkers and chat up the passers-by. I had lunch at the fair, which was a mistake since the only thing I could eat was pretty terrible. But I think I could find something else tomorrow - you would not believe the size of this convention center. Apparently the Frankfurt Book Fair attracts 280,000 people a year, and it's spread out in a convention center that has ten different halls that could each hold a very respectably-sized convention in their own right. And [censored] would be [censored] to know that Placebo is playing somewhere in that complex later this year - ah, memories.

After lunch, I wandered around a bunch of booths and had the supreme thrill of finding my books sitting on the shelf of the agent who is working to sell my foreign translation rights; she was in a meeting, so I didn't bug her, but I took a surreptitious photo and may try to say hi tomorrow. And I saw a lot of the stuff in the hall where my company is located; I somehow doubt that I'm going to get through the other nine tomorrow, but we shall see.

I took a break in the afternoon, since my feet were killing me; my hotel is right across the street from the convention center, but it's a fifteen minute walk to get from our hall at the other end of the complex to my hotel. But I schlepped myself home, took a nap, and did some work for the day job for an hour or so. Then I went back to the conference for a meeting with some other people at six p.m. Then we left, grabbed a bus back to the hotel, saw the line for taxis to take us to dinner, and were dismayed. Ravi and I decided to walk to dinner, even though it was 2.5miles (would have been shorter, but the bridge we planned to take was closed), and we still beat some of the people who were waiting for cabs when we left. But dinner was delicious - Greek food and copious amounts of wine, which is all good enough for me.

But in an utterly shocking turn of events, I managed to leave and go home after dinner (at 10:30pm) rather than continuing to some string of afterparties. My inner peer-pressure-succumbing social butterfly is sad, but my rational doesn't-want-to-get-sick-before-Paris side is thrilled at my unusual display of fortitude and common sense. I'm sure I'll throw it all out the window tomorrow. But now, it's time for bed!

you want a maserati?

I need to go to bed immediately, right now, at once - I meant to come home three hours ago, but I knew that was never going to happen. Today was totally awesome; I slept later than I should have, ate another delicious German omelette, and then went over to the exhibition hall, where I hung out with coworkers, walked around others' booths, and manned my company's booth for a couple of hours. I was done with all my scheduled stuff by three p.m., and I tried to wander around, but I ran out of energy (the conference area is a million square miles, equivalent to the square footage of Kazahstan) and my feet were destroyed. So I came back to the hotel at four, ordered room service to make up for the fact that I couldn't eat any of the conference food, and then took a nap.

Thus restored, I went out for dinner with the broader team, which was totally awesome; we ate at a v. fancy French place, where the wine kept coming (in magnums, not regular bottles, which felt particularly extravagant). I sat with some people I didn't know all that well before, but it was super fun and an excellent chance to meet people. Then I was going to make it back to the hotel and was on the verge of getting into a cab that would have carried me to safety when I was coerced into going to another bar for one more drink. There, I talked to a lovely Frenchman/coworker about life and fate and whether one should move to new countries every year (clearly the answer is yes), and escaped after a glass of wine (boo) but before the jagermeister shot (thank you, Jesus).

And now, I must sleep, since I must be up in six hours. Goodnight!

open the door, i'm gonna make you love me

I had intended to go to bed an hour ago, but if I go to bed a little after midnight at a conference, I consider that a success. Today was pretty awesome, all in all - I actually slept nine full hours last night and only woke up once, which is unheard of for the first day of jetlag. I credit the veritable pharmacy of over-the-counter holistic medicines I brought with me to try to stave off my inevitable cold/bronchitis - I took melatonin last night, which I've heard is a wonder drug, and it seemed to work (and is about to knock me out again). And this morning I loaded up on echinacea, zinc, and a whole emergen-C packet, which will probably do nothing, but I have my fingers crossed and my shank prepared to kill anyone who coughs within twenty feet of me.

So I woke up around ten, ordered room service (what turned out to be one of the best hotel omelettes I've ever had), showered, worked, and went downstairs for a meeting with other people from my company this afternoon. It was pretty good, despite the fact that I could eat none of the snacks (zee Germans apparently haven't heard of gluten-free, although it's still easier for me than it is for the vegetarians). We ended at five, I came upstairs and did some more work, and then we all went out for dinner at a German beer house. That means I had bratwurst, of course - they brought three bratwurst, which seemed excessive, but without buns (which would never occur to them to use anyway), I ate every single damn bite. Yum. I also had a lot of riesling and most of a large shot of schnapps, most of which was a mistake, even if it was over enough of a time frame that I didn't get anywhere close to messy. After dinner, many of us adjourned to another hotel's bar, where we hung out for awhile, but I left after an hour when I realized that the party was probably not quite my scene (mostly because I was too tired to enjoy the thought of being hungover tomorrow).

I walked back to my hotel with another girl, where we promptly bought water and went to our respective rooms. And now I must sleep if I have any hope of being useful tomorrow - goodnight!

no more counting dollars, we'll be counting stars

I need to go to bed immediately if I'm going to try to get on German time, but it's so tempting to stay up and work when I feel conscious instead of groggy. My flight last night was totally uneventful, albeit a bit uncomfortable; thank goodness I was in economy plus, since I would have felt truly claustrophobic if the seat in front of me had been closer and the guy next to me encroached on my space as much as this one did. He seemed nice enough, but he was a big guy and there was a big guy on the other side of him as well, so I was sort of crowded into the aisle. C'est la vie. United tried their hardest to bring me gluten-free meals (which I'd requested), but the gluten free breakfast was a single rice cake and a cup of applesauce, which was weird since the regular breakfast had fresh melons. Luckily I had carnitas tacos last night for supper and had snacks in my bag, so I was far from dying.

I really have nothing else of interest to report; a coworker and I took a taxi to the hotel together, then adjourned so that she could work and I could theoretically work. Instead, I unpacked in a valiant attempt to stay awake, then gave in to temptation and took a forty-five minute nap. Then I had dinner with the coworker, which was a v. leisurely affair and involved eating ribeyes and drinking wine, which are two of my favorite things. So, needless to say, I'm quite happy. We'll see if this mood continues when I have to start doing work stuff tomorrow, but fingers crossed. Goodnight!

we'll be counting stars

I'm at the airport, getting ready to go to Germany for my business trip. And I realized that this is the first overseas trip I've made without Chandlord in three years - it somehow doesn't feel right to be eating airport Mexican food without her. I shall persevere, however.

Today was a hermity myriad of preparatory activities, including packing, cleaning, deciding which tech gadgets to take and preparing them for travel, etc. I also got a pedicure, which was necessary for my vanity and unnecessary in the grand scheme of things. And now, I have 45 minutes to kill before boarding - I suppose I should spend it engaged in productive efforts, but I may people watch instead. Goodnight!

gone, gone, gone

I'm tired and vaguely surly; I didn't get enough sleep last night, and I should have gone to bed an hour ago, but I made the mistake of logging into my work laptop to find something and then ended up answering email for an hour. Stupid. I am leaving for the airport in sixteen hours and I haven't packed yet, nor have I finished entering my paper edits of Alex and Prudence into my laptop so that I don't have to lug around the paper copy in addition to two laptops, a tablet, an ereader, two phones, and all the other stuff I'm taking with me.

But today was fine, albeit mildly annoying; I woke up in time to meet Kathia for an 8:45am writing date (it was supposed to be 8:30, but I was late), and I worked for a couple of hours before abandoning her. Then I grabbed a late breakfast and did some shopping on Union Street (rather unnecessarily, but I got a couple of cute dresses and some new yoga pants, all of which I look forward to wearing in Europe until I realize that even my most chic attire isn't tres chic like the Parisians). I also got a massage, which I had booked a couple of weeks ago, knowing then that I would both really need a massage today and really regret the time I needed to take to get it. My knack for finding odd massage therapists continues; this one is really good and I felt awesome after, but she did take the liberty of crawling up onto the table again and kneeling on my thighs while kneading my back. It felt good last time and it felt good this time, but today got a little weirder when she shifted forward and knelt on my ass for awhile, then later said, 'doesn't it feel good to have an open butt?' Umm. No comment?

sssanyway, beyond that little oddity, the massage was great and exactly what I needed. Then I came home, vegged out for a bit and kind of took a half-nap, then talked to [censored]. I debated for too long what to do for dinner, but I ended up running to the store and getting stuff to make chili with, which may have been a mistake since today was super hot. But I ate supper, watched some of the Stanford/Washington game, got through a bunch of stuff on my to-do list, and organized my stuff so that I can pack it tomorrow.

And now, I must sleep - perhaps I'll blog from the airport tomorrow, but if not, I'll check in when I get to Frankfurt. Goodnight!

make that money, watch it burn

I probably should have gone to bed when I felt like doing so three hours ago, but I had tings to do, so I made myself a mug of tea and slogged on. Today was hectic; I got up late since I had stayed up late last night, but I decided to run for the 8:20 shuttle without drying my hair, since I wanted to make it to work in time for breakfast. But when I got to the shuttle stop, after nearly running, I pulled out my phone and discovered that the shuttle wasn't coming and I had to wait twenty minutes. Which, obvi, would have been enough time to dry my hair. Curses. I maybe should have just skipped that one too and had breakfast before going south, since not having breakfast threw off my whole day, but I stuck it out and got to the office at ten. And I had the rather hideous realization that the amount of time I've spent commuting this week is nearly equal to the amount of time I will spend on planes to/from Europe next week, which is a really fucking sobering thought. Traffic has been awful this week and I've spent three or four hours a day on the bus or in my car, so I'm looking forward to twelve glorious days of not commuting.

I slogged v. hard all day, but I snuck out in the afternoon for a doctor's appointment with my new primary care doctor, whom I really liked. Then, I was going to go shopping at Stanford mall since I was right next door, but I checked my work email and discovered that my business cards had come in just in time (I never use them in my real life, so I'd forgotten to ever order them), so I drove back to campus to pick them up. Then I went to Nordstrom Rack and did less damage than I wanted to but more than I should have. Then I ate a snack bar that I found in my purse and just barely survived the drive back into the city without going into some epic hunger-induced road rage. Once here, I was too tired to go out and too tired to cook, so I ate some frozen enchiladas and worked until now.

And now, I really should sleep; I have a writing date in the morning and tons of stuff I have to do to get ready for my trip. Goodnight!

you're still written in the scars on my heart

Today was mildly brutal, mostly because I only got five and a half hours of sleep last night. But I was out the door before seven this morning and made it to my eight a.m. training session with Alyssa (just barely), which helped to restore my mood. Then I showered, went to work, and slogged relentlessly all day; my only real break was to get a flu shot, which doesn't really seem like much of a break. But I ran into Chandlord as I was grabbing food from one of the cafes, so that was a pleasant and sparkly surprise. And I got through all of my meetings unscathed and was productive on the most urgent things on my to-do list, so I suppose that's something.

I will admit, though, that I cut out at 4:30 to have a v. early dinner with Jenni. We were planning to have dinner up in the city, but since we were both in MTV and since I had my car, we decided to eat in the south bay to avoid sitting on the bus for two hours before dinner. We ended up going to Vive Sol, which was both bad for my general wellness (since apparently margaritas aren't really all that good for you - who knew?) and bad for my guilty conscience (since I had told Terry I couldn't have a margarita with her, and then promptly went out for a margarita). Oops. But it was great to see Jenni, since we hadn't caught up in quite some time. And our plan worked beautifully; we caught a shuttle around seven p.m. (the only snafu was that the shuttle was twenty minutes late picking us up), and traffic was decent enough that I got home around eight. Or I assume traffic was decent; I slept the whole way home.

That, sadly, gave me the energy to slog for the last three hours to get through some more dayjob stuff. This isn't a real relapse; the start of the quarter is always hectic, made moreso because I'm going to be out of the office for most of the next two weeks. And perhaps I'm avoiding thinking about Alex and Prudence because I know I'm going to have to edit the crap out of them, which is still not filling me with a ton of joy. But I think I'm getting to the point where I'm excited to tackle them again, so hopefully I can get some writing done this weekend in the midst of my mad travel preparations.

Now, though, I need to sleep if I have any hope of getting things done tomorrow - goodnight!

the dream maker's gonna make you mad

I had way too long of a day today, even if a lot of it was positive. I woke up early and made it to my writing date by 7:15, and I wrote for an hour before heading off to catch the bus. Sadly, the bus was nearly twenty minutes late, which was twenty minutes that I could have spent writing, and then it took over an hour and a half to get to work, so all in from the moment I left the cafe to the moment I got to my desk was around two hours. This is getting really old really fast.

So I had to reschedule my morning to accommodate my v. tardy arrival, but that all seemed to go okay, even if it meant my lunch had to be crunched into ten minutes at my desk while doing ten other things. I slogged incessantly until 6:30pm, and then I went to Niamh and Francois's house for dinner (yes, those names are unpronounceable, sorry. Really, though, 'Niamh' is Irish and is pronounced 'Neve', so hopefully that is a good lesson for you today). Niamh did the training that I took on managing your energy a couple of weeks ago, but I knew her in Dublin and it was good to reconnect with her. And her husband is a writer who is about to leave his job, so we obviously had a lot to discuss there.

But before I knew it, it was almost ten p.m., and I still had to drive home. So I sped up to the city, took out my contacts and washed my face, and then slogged for the last hour and a half - some on day job stuff, some on a guest blog post that I had to write and turn in today. And now that my dual personalities have battled themselves for supremacy all day and come to an exhausted draw, I shall go to bed. Goodnight!

high heels off, i'm feeling alive

Today was lovely, although I didn't get nearly enough done at the day job and I'm realizing that I may be screwed tomorrow as a result. But that's okay; I will persevere, as I always do. I drove down to the office and arrive almost in time for my eight a.m. meeting, and then slogged until midday, when I took a break to train with Alyssa over lunch. Then I went back to the office and slogged all afternoon - but since it was meetings, and since I like all the people I met with, this wasn't much of a hardship. I took the shuttle home and intended to work on it, but the traffic was kind of bad, so I slept instead in an effort to avoid carsickness. Then, when I got home, I abandoned the day job laptop and instead took my personal laptop to my favorite French place, where I consoled myself with steak and wine while reading my editor's comments on Prudence and Alex's manuscript.

The verdict is that the changes are not so difficult as to be impossible (and there's a chance her plot suggestions were fueled by too much watching of 'Breaking Bad') - I'm mostly on board with them, although I need to mourn the loss of my belief that I was almost done. But this is a challenge for another day; I'm going to go to sleep, get up super early for a writing date with Kathia (if she shows up), and then slog all day in an attempt to catch up. Goodnight!

it's where my demons hide

Tomorrow is going to be brutal because today was brutal and seven and a half hours of sleep isn't going to be enough to unsuckify it. My commute took two horrible hours this morning, which was a most unwelcome start to my week, although I'm glad that I v. unusually ate something before it (leftover chicken, breakfast of champions) and decided to take the bus instead of driving. Still, it sucked. Then I slogged at work, with several breaks to walk around, all of which were negated by the gluten free red velvet cupcake that I inhaled while celebrating someone's birthday. It's kind of sad that the team knows me well enough now to get me some gluten free confection when they get treats for something, since I then feel compelled to eat it. The sugar crash hit just as I was getting on the shuttle to come home, but luckily the commute back to the city was perfect, so I didn't have to stab anyone with my last ounce of strength.

However, I did have to judge a bunch of not-so-great contest entries that were due today, so that's what I did on the bus and at home for an hour and a half, when I would have rather done anything else. Then I made a steak and a baked potato, ate that in hopes that it would fight off the cupcake coma, and picked up Chandlord so that we could go together to one of the many stops on the bar crawl to celebrate Tom's thirtieth birthday. We backed each other up in being old and sober, but we stayed for an hour, which I thought was totally respectable. Then I dropped her off, came home, and did the task I was dreading all day...I read my editor's editorial letter on Alex and Prudence.

I was not looking forward to this, since I'd read the first paragraph at noon before deciding I couldn't deal, and the first paragraph said something about this being hard but not impossible. Ugh, shoot me. So I finally read the letter tonight, and she was right - hard, not impossible. She's also right about what's wrong, and her suggestions to fix them are great. But guess what? Remember how I was so smug that I made it through this book without rewriting the first half? I'M GOING TO HAVE TO REWRITE THE FIRST HALF. God. Tanks, writing brain.

sssanyway, it's not that bad, but needless to say I'm displeased that my concerns about the book were founded. It would have been so much easier if she'd come back and said she loved it. But the plan to fix this is a story for another day - now I must go to bed immediately. Goodnight!

bang bang, you shot me down

I should have been more productive than I was today, but I should probably stop saying that before I give myself an ulcer. And really, it was quite a good day. I had a 9am writing date with Kathia in North Beach, which I decided to walk to, but I had to go pretty far out of my way so that I could walk around Russian Hill rather than over the top of it (which is, thankfully, not as bad as going over the top of a WWI trench, but is still quite a brutal slog during which some streets turn into steps). But the half-hour walk was a nice beginning to my day, and the cafe was v. lovely and sunny and right on a cable car line, which made for good people-watching. Kathia was just as unenthused about her book as I am about mine, which made me feel a little better even if she's working on the third book she's written in the time it will take me to finish this one. Ha. So we talked for a bit, and then I got a couple of hours of good work done on the editing side before throwing in the towel and walking home.

When I got home, I did a bit of tidying up, then took a shower, then had a late breakfast at my favorite cafe down the street, where I met the new waitress, then learned from the old waitress that one of the other regulars I've noticed in there is actually the first-ever topless dancer in San Francisco. You learn something new every day. I'm glad I learned something new, since I was engaged in the utterly cheerless task of judging entries in a writing contest, which usually fills me with sadness and malaise. Then I came home, talked to my parents, wrote up some judging comments, went out for a drink, came home again, and ate leftover chicken and greek salad while talking to Terry (who found the link to the stripper, so thank her for that).

And now, I must go to bed; I have to go to this thing called a day job tomorrow, which is unfortunate since I have a million other things to do as well. Goodnight!

don't pay no mind to the demons, they'll fill you with fear

I just realized that I need to go to bed immediately if I'm going to meet Kathia for our writing date tomorrow morning - damn. Today was v. fun and v. productive, though. I had breakfast with my CPA, which was a little entertaining (just entertaining enough that it made up for the fact that I now have an even more massive to-do list). Then I came home, took care of some of my to-do list, called my sister, read about some royal family gossip (Wills and Kate are in Scotland visiting the Queen!), and then brainstormed back cover copy until four p.m.

At that point, it was time to stop being a hermit and start hanging out with people my own age. So, I put on some appropriate clothes, changed into even more appropriate clothes when Terry told me it had gotten cold out, and then went to John and Jess's for their Oktoberfest party. My friends there were in fine form, as per usual, but the best joke of the night may have gone to Anthony in reference to Terry's lack of speaking in that crowd. Actually, I think I had told Katrina that she got joke of the night, but now I can't remember what it was. And anyway, everyone was qualified for joke of the night; the six or seven people I knew were all huddled around a side table, ignoring the other thirty people there, as per usual. And it was a glorious time, even if I did drink most of a bottle of wine and thus wrecked myself for any productivity tonight.

But now that I'm done with the interwebs and mostly recovered from my wine experience, I should sleep. Goodnight!

can't you feel my heartbeat running away

I have officially become old. I'm going to ginto bed before 10:30 so that I can get up early and write. Yeah, I don't know what's wrong with me either. Today was v productive, though, and I want to keep up my momentum. I slogged all day from home, then got my bangs trimmed and my brows waxed, then bought groceries so I can continue to feed myself. Later, I had drinks with Tom to talk about writing and life, which was great - but I had two double shots of Baileys on the rocks, which was about two more shots than I should have had. And I was so late getting home that I missed my opportunity to have dinner with Terry, which is a shame since I was going to con her into having a steak. So she went out with another friend and I stayed home and ate frozen enchiladas like the winner I am.

And now that I've fallen asleep while trying to write in my journal, I think it's time to go to bed - goodnight!

you better lose yourself

Today was a great day - perhaps not on the level of one of Taylor Swift's fairytale days, but then, I'm kind of glad that I'm me and not her, so I suppose I'll take what I can get. I made it down to the glorious south bay in time to train with Alyssa at eight a.m., which was less brutal than it sounds. Then I showered and made it to the office just in time for my ten a.m. meeting, which was quite interesting and useful and all that. And then I slogged the rest of the day, with a lunch break to have lunch with someone who recently joined the team. I must say that for all that going back to work has severely cramped my eccentric style, I picked a pretty good team to go back to; when I can ignore the annoyances, I can appreciate how nice it is that they all tend to eat lunch together at least a couple of times a week, and that we have cupcakes or champagne or other non-Alyssa-approved celebratory dishes on a v. frequent basis.

sssanyway, I skipped out just before five and picked up John, who had conned me into (or rather, asked me to) take him home with a stop at BevMo to pick up German beer for the party they're throwing this weekend. This was quite a fun errand, and I hit the five cent wine sale hard (eight bottles that will go straight to my liver). Traffic back wasn't bad, and since we took 280 it was even lovelier, which made for a nice backdrop to a rather philosophical conversation about life and choices and mindfulness and all those other buzzwords. I should have been wearing some lululemon yoga pants, but as I don't have any, my dress hopefully sufficed.

After I dropped him off, I came home, made some scrambled eggs with avocado (dinner of champions), and then met up with one of Chandlord's friends for a drink. I considered this more work than personal, so I prioritized it over all the other stuff I should have done tonight (including more fun drinks with someone else). She's starting some sort of mindfulness/yoga/development class/group and Chandlord thought I might be interested. And I think I am; it's so hard for me to carve out time unless I calendar it, and joining a group would probably help. But we shall see.

I walked home, which was a mile and a half down a hill so steep there were stairs cut into it (back in 1915!) for at least three blocks, which made me a little dizzy. And I got hit on by two old guys outside my favorite French restaurant who produced a gigantic fake diamond ring the size of my fist, so they must just sit there and hit on girls all the time (I'd seen them last week and ignored them, but this week I humored them). So really, today was a win all around. Goodnight!

leave me breathless

Today was v. productive, just the way I like it. I almost didn't want to be productive tonight, and very nearly made a dash for freedom by arranging to have drinks with someone, but instead I forced myself to slog and probably felt better for it. I was on the shuttle by 7:25 this morning, worked all the way to the office, and then slogged v. diligently all day (meetings + writing my overdue self assessment). But I cut out at four to take the shuttle home, since I couldn't bear the thought of getting home when it was already dark. And when I got on the bus, I discovered that Terry was similarly slacking, so I sat next to her and we chatted for a few minutes until the bus left campus and any talking would earn an immediate and well-deserved lynching from the surly shuttle crowd.

So I worked all the way home (except for the last twenty minutes, which would have made me throw up on my keyboard if I'd kept working), then took a break and tidied up my room and generally did nothing for an hour. Then I made breakfast for supper, procrastinated for a bit, and then spent two hours editing Alex and Prudence. I got through about forty pages, which was great progress, and I think the second half of the book is smoother sailing than the first, so I hope I can get through with this pass this weekend. I'm still waiting to hear back from my editor, so I'm by no means done yet, but I'm getting closer and can hopefully force myself to get the book out at the end of October as promised.

And now I desperately need to sleep; I'm training with Alyssa tomorrow at eight a.m., which requires leaving her at some ungodly hour (aka 6:40). Goodnight!

i want to be the sand inside her hourglass

I should have gone to bed an hour ago and shut off my laptop an hour before that, but clearly I have failed. Today was fine, but I missed my eight a.m. meeting because the bus took longer than I thought it would. Then I had to sit through a three and a half hour training on discrimination in the workplace, which was much more entertaining than it sounds since zee company pays a very very entertaining lawyer to deliver it. Then I had an afternoon full of meetings, met with the little boss, and left the office a little before six to have a friendship renewal dinner with Tolu and Jane.

When I got home, I had grand plans to write, but I got sucked into watching 'The Voice' with Terry and her sister. And now, I'm spent. Hopefully tomorrow yields a bit more me-time, in the form of time to actually do stuff on my many and varied to-do lists and possibly take some time to write as well. Goodnight!

heaven's got a plan for you

I'm trying something new and trying to avoid screens for an hour before going to bed, so I'm blogging earlier than usual - you'll just have to trust that I made it into bed after this, which I know is a dicey proposition. Today was excellent, though; I worked out with Alyssa, slogged very diligently until sometime after six (with a break to have lunch with Jason, one of my old coworkers), took the bus home, ate some leftover steak (dinner of champions), and then worked on a bit of romance novel stuff until now. Yes, I know that's all v. boring. But then, I lead a v. boring life, when I'm not being oh-so-glamorous (which happens far less than it will when I'm the octogenarian I was born to be).

And now, I'm going to turn off zee computer and discover what I can do in an hour without screens - I'm expecting something miraculous that will probably end up just being boring. Goodnight!

galvanize

I was horrendously productive today, which was a good thing for my puritanical instincts but perhaps a bad thing for my eyes. I spent the morning and early afternoon working on Alex and Prudence, but I eventually had to take a break and get out of the house before I went crazy. So I took a long walk to the bank, then came home and talked to my parents (as per usual). After talking to them, I made a marinade for some meat, then started taking care of all the millions of annoying things that have piled up on my to-do list. I have been a lazy, lazy wench when it comes to everything but writing and the day job for the past, oh, six months, and it shows in the fact that my email inboxes are out of control, my financial tracking is a mess, and everything is generally in a state of constant havoc.

So I spent the evening sending emails for things that happened an embarrassingly long time ago (including billing people for something I paid for in May - ha), although I took a nice break to cook and eat some steak fajitas. I would like to keep going with the productivity kick, since I was in some sort of flow, but I think sleep is more important; I have to train with Alyssa in the morning, and then try to get into this same flow with the day job, where I am perhaps less behind but am perhaps more expected to do stuff. Goodnight!

i just closed my eyes and swung

I had a truly lovely day - between my one social plan for the weekend and some forced productivity + forced downtime, I feel quite accomplished. I got up relatively early and met up with Heather (aka dear respected madam) for brunch down near the ballpark, which is somewhere I never ever go. But the food was great - I had these 'messy eggs' that were full of garlic and onions and bacon, and they were v. delicious. And the company was, as usual, great as well, even if we were seated between two v. noisy parties who made it difficult for us to carry on a real conversation.

After brunch, we adjourned to my salon because I had convinced Heather to come up and get a brow wax and facial from my favorite aesthetician ever. I got my facial first, and it was excellent; the woman has hooked me on all sorts of ridiculous products that have made my skin feel better than it has at any other point in my life, and I told her point-blank that I'd brought her a 'whale', since Heather's addiction to overpriced beauty products rivals my own. And I'm pretty sure Heather bought a whole ton of stuff after, so the salon people should be very happy with me for some time to come. After I was done, Heather got a facial and brow wax while I sat at Peet's and contemplated Prudence and Alex (without much success).

When we'd wrapped up our pampering, I dropped Heather off at her car, went to the grocery store, bought myself a bunch of meat and flowers, and then came home, cleaned out the fridge, cleaned the kitchen, put away the groceries, and arranged my flowers to put in a charming ceramic pitcher in my bathroom (yes, I called my own bathroom charming). Then I wrote in my journal. Then I contemplated working and failed. Then I made a delicious dinner (ribeye and a sweet potato), drank copious amounts of tea, and edited the first thirty pages of Prudence and Alex's story. That may not sound like a lot, but it actually is - you'll have to trust me on that.

And now, I must sleep; I want to get through more than thirty pages tomorrow, and I have some other stuff I should take care of for all my many and varied jobs, so it's time to sleep. Goodnight!

laugh riot

Today was a v. long and tiring day, which is nonsense since I did no real work for the day job. That's not entirely true; I was in a training from nine to five, but the training was on managing my energy, which isn't directly relevant to all the mundanities of my day to day. Of course, managing my energy is crucial in the long term, but I kind of left the day feeling validated that I have a lot of my shit figured out already; with the exception of the fact that my life allows no time for meeting new people or perhaps making a baby (ew), the rest of it is really good. Yes, I'm being obnoxiously smug.

But I got to work out of the evil city, which was nice, and the training was a great exercise. And the trainer invited me over for dinner sometime soon, which might sound weird except for the fact that we knew each other when I lived in Dublin (she's relocated here). So that was all v. nice. Then I came home, made up my bed with fresh sheets, talked to [censored], and had dinner with Terry. After that, I really really didn't want to go out, but I had promised to go to an improv show with some of my coworkers (and had already bought the ticket) - so I took a twenty minute nap, then miraculously rallied and made it down to the Financial District for the show. Sadly, I didn't enjoy the show as much as I thought I would; some bits were funny, but they only performed for <40mins and the ticket was $20, which I thought was v. overpriced. But we adjourned to Hidden Vine and had wine after, so that was nice.

And now, I must sleep, since I have grand plans to both relax and be productive tomorrow, which may be difficult. Goodnight!

you got a fast car

I am so full of meat that it's not really funny anymore - I'm pretty sure I have the meat sweats. I had dinner with some of my coworkers at a Brazilian steakhouse in Palo Alto, and I ate an absurd quantity of meat. We were all starving when we got there since we hadn't eaten much all day, and this place made some seriously legit meat, all of which they brought around on giant skewers and carved off for us as necessary. They even brought out the special skewer of chicken hearts at the request of one of the Brazilians on my team, but it was a little intense to end on organ meat after eating at least two pounds (I may be being conservative here) of other meats. Okay, maybe it wasn't two pounds. But I had two sausages, at least six ounces of filet mignon, more sirloin than I can remember, some tritip, a piece of pork, a piece of turkey wrapped in bacon...I would continue, but now I kind of want to vomit. And then I want to go back and do it again.

sssanyway, the rest of the day was good; I worked out with Alyssa this morning, which was excellent, and then I slogged without respite until 5:45. Then I had a meat feast, then I drove two of the guys on my team back to the city with me, and now I really need to go to bed and sleep off my protein coma so I can be somewhat productive tomorrow. False hope, I know. Goodnight!

i throw my hands up in the air sometimes

For some reason I'm exhausted today - I think it's because I didn't get any downtime at the end of the day between working and immediately jumping into my writing stuff, and that's usually a recipe for disaster. But the day was mostly good; I didn't throw up on the shuttle (high bar for satisfaction there), I was moderately successful in all my meetings, I liked what I ate for lunch, and I got home by 5:15. Easy peasy. And I finished reading through Prudence and Alex over a steak dinner at my favorite overpriced French place, where they know me well enough now that the waiter just asked 'can I take your menu?' rather than asking what I wanted to order. Lovely.

Now, though, I'm going to go to bed even though it's only nine p.m.; I want to sleep the sleep of the just and wake up refreshed enough to enjoy my workout with Alyssa before doing some slogging. Goodnight!

maybe i'm just in love when you wake me up

Today was v. productive for the day job and v. unproductive for the rest of my life. Actually, that's not entirely true; I got a blood test since I haven't had a physical in awhile, but since the blood test wasn't until 9:45, I was totally starving at the end of it. Luckily the phlebotomist realized that my right arm was a no-go and tried my left arm before just jabbing into my right arm and digging around for the vein, so the procedure was totally painless and non-unconsciousness-inducing. And then I went down the block and had breakfast at the closest place I could find with decent Yelp reviews, which was difficult since I was smack in the heart of the overpriced tourist mecca that is Union Square/Chinatown. The coffee was decent, though, and the omelette was pretty good, and really I would have eaten anything to stop my stomach from screaming and my head from spinning.

Thus refreshed, I came home and slogged nonstop for six hours, which was great for my to-do list and v. bad for my eyes. When Terry got home, I was dazed and exhausted, and I couldn't decide between grabbing dinner with her and taking a shower (two v. different things). But I opted for dinner, so we walked down to Chestnut and had a v. casual dinner at some burger place. Then we went to Nectar and attended Kathia's launch party for her latest book (which comes out tomorrow) - she was v. classy and served all sorts of champagne and wine, and it was all lovely. I also had a fun run-in with one of my day job competitors (from the company Jess used to work for), although I doubt they see us as much competition, so it was all v. civil. Then Terry and I came home, I did some desultory stuff around my room, and now I must sleep so that I can hit it hard tomorrow. I'm hoping to spend a little bit less time slogging and a bit more time with Alex and Prudence, but we shall see what happens. Goodnight!

no apologies

I'm way way tired - last night's eight hours weren't enough, and my morning commute was thoroughly miserable. But I made it to my meetings, then trained with Alyssa, then slogged on my own all afternoon (with a break for a walk-and-talk with the woman who manages stuff other than books). I'm happy to report that I got to the bottom of my corporate email inbox, partially by unilaterally archiving all the starred stuff from March.

After work I had dinner on campus, then went to Philz and read half of.Alex and Prudence's book. I have a lot of criticisms of it myself, so hopefully I'll get a lot of quality time to write and sort some of this out.

Now I must sleep - goodnight!

too many shadows, whispering voices, faces on posters, too many choices

Apologies for not blogging last night; usually I blog no matter how much alcohol I've consumed, but by the time I got home (sometime after two a.m.), I was a total wreck. We celebrated Terry's birthday yesterday (happy birthday, Terry!), which meant I capped off a week of sin and iniquity with one last rollercoaster binge before I got back to my regularly scheduled days of working nonstop. In fact, today was supposed to be one of those days, but since I was too wrecked to do anything, I had to settle for sitting on the couch and staring at the television (lame).

Yesterday started off tame; I got up at 7:30 (shocking), puttered around the house, and then did a bit of work before showering - I cleaned my room, printed out a clean copy of Alex and Prudence's story so I can read it and start editing, and did some financial tings. Then I showered, put on a dress, and accompanied Terry to a festive birthday brunch at the fancy French bistro where I sometimes write. Chandlord and Katrina met us there, and it turns out the breakfast food there is fantastic - I'd never had brunch there, but my omelette forestiere was fantastic. I usually don't like omelettes because they can be dry, but these eggs were perfectly cooked, and the bacon/mushrooms/onions on top were also excellent. We split a bottle of champagne with orange juice for mimosas, and generally had a v. lovely time catching up. Unfortunately, I made a mistake adding up my meal + gratuity and was off by a dollar, which wasn't a big deal obvi, but it kind of became a big deal because Chandlord called me on it and then it became clear that I am known for an almost robotic tendency to always be correct about stuff. So that was both hilarious and vaguely terrifying. But if that was my one mistake for the year, I'll take it.

After brunch, we walked Chandlord to Van Ness so she could meet up with Tom Foolery, and then Terry and I came home to recuperate. She watched football and took a nap, but I slogged on with my financial stuff (I'm trying to get Sara Ramsey's house in order - it may be time to set up a business, but I've been avoiding it thus far and am debating how long I can continue without incorporating her). At six, though, I threw in the towel, and Terry and I had a drink at a wine bar on Fillmore, which was an excellent spot. Then we met up with Lauren (aka Subz) for what was supposed to be a v. quiet and sedate birthday dinner.

And it started quiet and sedate; we ordered a bottle of wine and a couple of appetizers (the plantains were to die for), and continued to imbibe over dinner (which, for me, was also to die for - I had a churrasco steak that was out of this world good, grilled perfectly and served with plantains and a fried egg on top, which was shockingly good). Then we ordered another bottle of wine. Why, when there were only three of us, I'm not quite sure, but it seemed like a great idea at the time. And since I think we all expected we'd call it a night shortly after that, it would have been entirely reasonable to drink that much with dinner.

But then as we were leaving, we walked by a fortune teller's sign, and Lauren and I decided to make Terry get her fortune read. So we went up and bought her a palm reading, which we got to sit and observe, which was quite hysterical. The fortune teller told her to avoid Irishmen (because they are awful) and to look for an Italian or Persian guy, or possibly an Armenian or a Spaniard. And then she told Terry that she should go to the W Hotel bar to meet someone (this is relevant later).

So we dragged Terry down the street to another bar, where I had 2.5 cocktails (I believe Lauren did too, but Terry was v. cleverly avoiding her drinks, which is where my .5 cocktail came from) and interacted briefly with some very douchey guys. Then we decided that the W bar was in Terry's destiny, so we cabbed over there and had another drink or two there while chatting to some dudes who were v. entertaining (but also married, so tanks for nothing, fortune teller!). It should be clear to you by now that I was approximately ten drinks in at this point, which explains why I was such a mess today. We finally left there, came home, I somehow miraculously made it into bed, and I slept the sleep of the intoxicated (made slightly less lovely because I forgot to tell my fitness bracelet that I was going to sleep, so it buzzed me every 45 minutes to tell me to get up and walk around).

This morning, needless to say, was a nightmare, and I felt extremely ill (although I wasn't actually sick). Terry ordered me a pizza since I was too hungover to even contemplate walking down the street for my usual huevos rancheros hangover cure, and I sat on the couch and watched football, which is a sign of how messy I was. Then I eventually showered, took care of a couple of minor things, talked to my parents, talked to Terry's brothers (who came over), watched some "Drunk History" with them (I would be a fabulous narrator for that show), and then talked to [censored]. And now, I must sleep; I have to work tomorrow, which should not surprise you, but I also want to get out early so that I can hole up in a coffeeshop and read Alex and Prudence. Goodnight!

look down your glasses at that aranciata

Today was v. tiring but somewhat productive/uplifting despite a few hours of rage in the middle. I got up somewhat early and drove to Palo Alto to train with Alyssa, then drove straight back home to work from home rather than going into the office. This was a fine and dandy plan, and I was on my way to spending some quality time brainstorming the future of my team and our vision and all that fun stuff. But then something happened at work that turned into a firedrill, which kind of ruined my afternoon. Enraged, I signed off at 4:50 and went straight to a pre-arranged massage, which was either the best or worst timing ever. I was so tense that the woman ended up climbing up onto the table and kneeling on my thighs while working on my back, but it really helped me to come down from my rage high.

The day wasn't all bad, though; I bought a new notebook at the Japanese stationery store down the street (a notebook I'd watched a fifteen minute YouTube video on a couple of weeks ago - yes, I'm that much of a dork). So I spent some quality time this afternoon and tonight setting it up and breaking it in. I know, this is nonsensical to just about all of you. I also made myself a steak and a baked potato for dinner, and I brainstormed titles for my next book (the one after Alex and Prudence). I think I came up with some good ones, but I also came up with some ridiculous ones, and I need to ponder some more before making any decisions.

Now, I shall sleep - this is the first time in ages that I'm not setting an alarm, and I am SO EXCITED. If anyone wakes me up, I shall disembowel them and feed their entrails to Karl the Fog. Goodnight!

given the chance, i'm gonna be somebody

Today was particularly brutal, but I seem to have emerged from it unscathed. I didn't sleep very well last night, and it was for far less time than I would have liked, so I woke up groggy and categorically refused to get out of bed to go to yoga with Chandlord. So I slept for another forty-five minutes, which wasn't enough, then dragged myself through the shower and into some pants so I could run for the shuttle. I ended up taking half a mexican dramamine for the ride, since I was already feeling a little nauseated (last night's champagne binge is correlation, not causation), and while it kept me from throwing up all over my shirt, it also made me hella sleepy. Luckily my brain seems capable of rallying in just about any situation, so I think I came off well in the career panel I spoke on - or maybe I came off super cynical and sarcastic, since I had multiple people come up and thank me for being so 'real'. Ha. That's code for something, right?

sssanyway, I had a mimosa after (why? why is there always champagne around me?), then took two bottles of unopened champagne back to my team for their later enjoyment, since they way over-ordered stuff for the mixer after the panel. Then I immediately had four hours of meetings with no break, although I forced a break in there somewhere so I could make a v. boring salad. The meetings were good, though, and I felt reasonably accomplished at the end. So I met up with John and Vidya at TGIF, where we drank some wine (why? why is there always wine around me?) and laughed at jhokes. I only had a tiny bit of wine, so I was able to drive the three of us back to the evil city, which was far more entertaining than taking the shuttle even if tonight's drive was brutal. Then we met up with Jess for an impromptu dinner in my old neighborhood - there's a Mexican restaurant next to Chow that is amazeballs, and I had some of the best carnitas I've had in a very long time, along with a pitcher of margaritas (why? why are there always margaritas around me?). But I didn't finish my margarita, and it was mostly mango anyway, so I'm hopeful that I will sleep the sleep of the just tonight, rather than the sleep of the drunk.

And now I really must sleep; I have a million work things to do tomorrow, since the person who was most inspired by my career advice today may have been myself (hahahaha). Goodnight!

i shake it your way

Happy birthday to me! Thanks for all of you who sent messages, called, tried to call, facebooked, etc. - I had a lovely day of mourning, and I appreciate all of you. I especially appreciate Chandlord, who is exercising decorum and restraint by refraining from forcing me to let her guest blog, even though she's also exercising an odd display of generosity by allowing two drunken Scottishmen/Englishmen to stay in her apartment while she sleeps in my bed. Best birthday gift ever!

sssanyway, today was perfectly lovely. I went to work, met with some people, and then snuck out to train with Alyssa (remember her?) since one of my post-birthday goals is to take some more time for myself that is neither dayjob-related nor book-related so that I don't wreck my body and go totally insane in the process. Then I grabbed my favorite coffee, went back to work, had cupcakes that my team bought for me, slogged for a couple of hours, and took the shuttle home. So industrious, I know.

Upon reaching home, I talked to the parents for a few minutes, then reapplied my lipstick, then walked down to the evil Marina to have dinner with Terry and Lauren (aka Subz). Subz, as usual, grilled me about my future, but I think my answers were satisfactory; I want to write a shit-ton of books without losing my friends or failing to have a life, so that's a good goal, right? Then we adjourned next door to a wine bar, where I had a champagne flight while partaking in some family time with Chandlord, Adit, Priyanka, John, Jess, Terry, Subz, and the Scots/English dudes (the Scottish guy is actually known to me, since I met him during zee German/Indian/Scottish wedding I went to in 2011).

And I'm v. sorry to report to my father that he must stop blaming all of my alcoholic woes on Adit; Priyanka let slip that Adit is more ridiculous around me than he is around most people, so it's possible that I'm actually responsible for his woes. I won't go so far as to claim all responsibility, since he's quite capable of getting drunk without me, but it's possible that the correlation between Adit's presence and my drunkenness isn't as clear as it might seem.

sssanyway again, we had a v. lovely time getting cozy in the least obviously cozy part of the bar, which confused the waitress to no end, particularly since Adit insisted on rearranging all the furniture to make it more cozy. Then, after everyone left, Chandlord and I adjourned to Balboa Cafe with the foreigners + a bunch of unknown cougars, and the four of us (sans cougars, unless I've automatically become one by turning thirty-two) had another drink while discussing how if they walk south and east of Chandlord's apartment into the 'loin, they will meet their deaths. Then Chandlord and I abandoned them to said deaths and came to my place, and now I must sleep so that I can participate in a career development panel for some impressionable minds tomorrow morning. Hahahaha. Goodnight!

you can turn a phrase into a weapon or a drug

I was super surly today, which was not good for my stress levels; the wall I hit hard yesterday continues to block me, but now it's more of a wild oscillation between my desire to get something done and my total apathy for everything on my to-do list. I spent some quality time on the shuttle this morning daydreaming about my next series and thinking of titles, but then I got to work and promptly developed a headache that lasted all day (and somehow seemed to get worse rather than better). I had lunch with Joann, which was lovely and v. long overdue, but then I went back to my desk and couldn't concentrate on anything at all. And since I only had one more meeting (not counting a one-on-one with the little boss, who canceled on me), I caught the four o'clock shuttle and came home to nurse my headache in solitude.

My surliness somehow increased rather than decreased after my nap on the shuttle, but I ate some nachos (not good for me, but good for my surliness) and then reread most of my gargoyles manuscript, which somehow put me in a better mood because that book could be really awesome and I like most of what I have. Then I sent some emails, got ready for tomorrow, and am now going to go to bed in hopes that sleep will improve my mood and my head. It is not lost on me that some of this may be related to getting older, but it seems that more of it is related to being burned out from having a month where both the day job and the writing job were more intense than usual - so hopefully I can recover this month before I do something I'll regret (like chopping off my hair, or developing a crack addiction). Goodnight!

you're my head start, you're my rugged heart

I don't have anything of substance to say about work today, other than that I was too exhausted to fully enjoy it (if 'enjoy' is the right word; it probably isn't, but I can't think of another). I think I finally, brutally hit the wall erected by last weekend's over-extended writing burnout, which has turned my brain to mush and given me a headache that won't die. Which was not the state that I would have preferred to be in to see my gynecologist this morning, but then, I never really want to see my gynecologist (even though she is a lovely woman who makes me laugh), so I suppose I might as well have spent an otherwise-useless morning subjecting myself to her tortures rather than to the tortures of my inbox.

sssanyway, after that, I went to the office, slogged for a few hours, and then rode home with Terry, during which it became apparently I was useless since I was mostly falling asleep on her. We stopped at the grocery store on the way home, so I bought myself a steak and a potato to eat tonight so that I wouldn't have to have an eccentric dinner at my favorite French place. And I decided that I was going to read a book tonight rather than contemplating the million things on my to-do list...which was a good idea. So I picked up Sherry Thomas's upcoming YA debut, THE BURNING SKY; I have had an advance copy since RWA but was saving it for a raining day, and this was it.

And I'm happy to report that it restored a bit of my happiness, even if my brain is too mushy to force back into usefulness. I finished the whole thing, as is my wont, and really enjoyed it, even if I'm not glad that I have to wait for the next two books in the series. But it made me eager to get back to my non-gargoyles book, so maybe I'll think about that tomorrow. Or maybe I'll stare, drooling, at the wall until my thoughts come back. Fun times all around. Goodnight!

the time has come to galvanize

I was totally wrecked all day today, but last night was worth it. I woke up at seven and couldn't go back to sleep, which means I was under-rested for my writing date this morning - but it allowed me to go down the street for some restorative huevos rancheros first, so that was good. Then I met up with Kathia and caught up with her for a bit before commencing zee work; I'm trying to plot the next novel on my list (featuring the villain in Prudence's story), and this is a good time to do it since I am trying to keep from opening Prudence and Alex's book so I can come back to it with fresh eyes next weekend. I didn't get very far this morning, but given that everything was spinning and I felt like death, the amount of progress I made was actually astonishing.

After writing, I came home, cleaned the kitchen to restore it to its former glory, and then took a nap. Then I talked to zee parents, who were in fine form, although it's like a million degrees there, which makes me feel silly for complaining about yesterday's one day of heat in San Francisco. The fog is back and I can hear the horns tonight, which is v. comforting. After talking to them, I ate some nachos (dinner of champions), watched some football with Terry (clearly I couldn't comprehend the thought of doing anything, since I had no desire to watch football), then came upstairs and took a v. restorative bubble bath. Then I made some notes on the not-so-secret young adult non-gargoyle book that I pick up and put away again in the breaks between my historical romances; I kind of want to finish it this year, but we'll see whether I have the time. And now that I've exhausted myself just thinking of it, I'm going to go to bed early so I can get nine hours of sleep before work tomorrow. Goodnight!

say my name, say my name

Double entendre. Ha!

Terry is v. transfixed by a football game...which was true three hours ago, when I began to write this blog post. I would like to claim that I am perfectly sober and reliable as a narrator of my own story, but that would require a leather jacket and a 'mission accomplished' banner, neither of which are easily procurable or accurate. So I will fill you in by saying that I had a birthday party/royal baby shower today, which went off with flying colors.

As usual, I way overextended myself and made way too much food, but this is not something I regret. As usual, Chandlord threw a drink down my shirt, then demanded to have cake (which I had no intention of baking). As usual, Adit called and feigned ignorance of my party, only to show up ninety seconds later. As usual, Heather (aka dear respected madam) was a v. good sport. As usual, Katrina didn't understand basic human sexuality. As usual, John made awkward sexual references to my fake baby doll (who was Prince George for the evening). As usual, Subz took me at my word and showed up with a fascinator, which was v. welcome.

So basically, as usual, everyone was totally ridic. I made a v. tasty champagne punch with cognac, triple sec, and grand marnier, which was dangerous and encouraged bad behavior. And bad behavior was easily achieved - this was one of zee most enjoyable nights I've had in quite some time, particularly since everyone turned my ham sandwich into a birthday cake and did a candle ceremony for me (in which everyone said something nice, then blew out their candle, which got dangerous for the last people to go since the candles were dangerously short by that point).

Post party, I went out with Adit and Priyanka, which was a mistake I was willing to live with. Then Priyanka and I talked for a bit before I uber'd it home like the fancy bitch I am. And now I must go to sleep - goodnight!

like a drum my heart never stops beating for you

I desperately need to get some sleep, so I really shouldn't be blogging - but if I hadn't forced myself to blog to the point of this becoming a mindless habit, I would never blog again. So I suppose you should be grateful? If 'grateful' is the right way to describe the feeling you should have when reading the drivel about my everyday life. I'm out of words, so you're going to have to settle for 'grateful' even if it's likely something v. different.

sssanyway, I took the shuttle down to the office this morning, slogged for several hours, had lunch with some people on zee team, and left at 2:15 so I could beat traffic to the city. Once here, I got my bangs trimmed and my brows waxed, then went to Target and Whole Foods, and then came home, where I was too tired to do anything I had planned to do. Oops.

But I rallied my energy levels and had dinner with Terry, as previously planned. We walked down to Chestnut to have dinner at the restaurant where I took my parents while they were here, but we stopped by the wine bar next door first to say hi to my friend Kathia, who plied us with wine in the fifteen minutes we had between our arrival and our departure. Then we had a lovely steak dinner (for me, at least; Terry was basically a vegetarian and ordered the chicken) and discussed Alex and Prudence's book. Terry read the draft yesterday and today and gave her feedback tonight, which was incredibly helpful. And I had three and a half glasses of wine, which was also helpful. Then we came home and I was going to do some drunk baking, but I thought better of it, so I'm going to go to bed and then get up and hit it all tomorrow. Goodnight!

it's where my demons hide

I made it onto the shuttle by 7:35 this morning, which was kind of miraculous given how tired I was, but the day went way better than I expected. I slogged (kind of), had meetings all afternoon, and then sat around on the couches near my desk and had champagne with some of my coworkers. I may or may not have had approximately half a bottle, which was awesome (I chose the champagne, so it wasn't swill), but it meant that I had to leave my car there and take the shuttle home, which means I have to go to Mountain View in the morning instead of working from home. Oops.

But things are good, even if I feel behind on everything - the book is off being reviewed by zee editor, stuff at work is progressing, and I seem on track to see some friends this weekend, so that's all great. Now, though, I am desperate for sleep and sad that I have to get up and catch the shuttle, so wish me luck with that. Goodnight!

lionheart

I think I desperately need a day away from all devices. Maybe a week, although I'm not going to get it. But today was particularly rough; I slogged v. aggressively until seven p.m., then was on call for something going on at work while I ate pizza and watched 'So You Think You Can Dance' with Terry (it's a sign of how tired I was that I actually watched it with her, since I usually avoid it at all costs). Then I came upstairs, spent some quality time washing my face with many and varied products, and then wrote ten pages to complete the scene that was still missing from Prudence and Alex's book. But I finished it, liked it, and sent the whole thing off to my editor - so it's done done, which is great, and just in time for me to take six hours off before needing to start edits so I can release it publicly at the end of October.

And now it's one a.m., and I had intended to get up five hours from now. I don't know if that's possible, but imma see what I can do. But yay for productivity! And I'm hatching a plan to have mimosas at work tomorrow, so at least I have that to look forward to. Goodnight!

my feet are still sore, my back is on the fringes

I should have gone to bed when I was tempted to two hours ago...stupid. Today was totally fine, but I'm in the middle of my writing hangover, which means that thinking is difficult and the last thing I want to do is stare at a screen. Sadly, I had to work, and I also had to write tonight (there is a scene I didn't finish that I want to insert for my editor), so I slogged all day, then came back to the evil city and went to my favorite French bistro, where they very efficiently plied me with steak and wine while I wrote some sexytimes.

The day wasn't all work, though - I had a delightful lunch with Chandlord, who helped me to eat less by spilling her water all over me and my half-eaten plate of food. Tanks! And I listened to music and stared out the window all the way home on the shuttle, which was good for my relaxation even if it wasn't good for my to-do list. And now I'm going to go to bed, wake up, and work from home in the morning, which hopefully means I'll get some stuff done. Goodnight!

my finger is on the button

Sorry for not blogging last night. Words have been in short supply for anything but the manuscript. But I'm DONE. Just in time to take twenty minutes off between my four-day working weekend and my upcoming four-day workweek. Hahahahahaha *dies*.

I'm alternating between loving and hating it, so I sent it off to the editor with both eagerness and total fucking trepidation. Eagerness because I want feedback; trepidation because there are some problems I currently sense and don't yet know how to fix, and I'm too tired/burned out/behind on the deadline to fix them. But at least it's off. I have to write another scene tomorrow to send to her as an insert, but that's like a walk in the park compared to the hundred pages I wrote in the last four days. Yes, I wrote a hundred pages. If I could write like that all the time I would be a machine, but I would be a dead machine, so it's good that I don't do that.

Anyway, yesterday and today were good if you're a hermit, bad if you're not. I did get out of the house last night to have dinner at Lauren and Nathan's, which was the only remotely fun thing I did this weekend (unless you count talking to my parents while sitting on the roof yesterday). I guess I went to Starbucks and got a tea at some point. And I had a conversation with the owner of Morning Due yesterday, so that was good. And I cleaned the drain filter in the washing machine. Yes, my life is v. exciting.

So, yay to being done, boo to having to go to work tomorrow, book to the ulcer that will probably form while I wait for my editor to get back to me and I consider all the ways I messed this up, yay to remembering all the great bits that I wrote. Goodnight!

sweet nothing

I wrote twenty-five pages today. That's amazing, but it was pretty brutal; I should have just not worked this morning and read a book or something instead, but I kept trying to force it, and as a result I burned out my eyes and also didn't get much done. But I managed to get my shit together and do some serious writing this afternoon and tonight. So hopefully I will remember this lesson tomorrow and just go for a walk or something.

But now I desperately need to sleep - hopefully I can finish the book tomorrow. I need to write four more scenes and do a full read-through, so I don't know if it's actually possible, but I'm going to try - I would dearly love to take Monday off. Goodnight!