world serves its own needs, don't mis-serve your own needs

It's only 8:30pm, but I think I'm going to go to bed - my neck and shoulder are hurting and I'm worried that it's going to turn into one of those debilitating neck things that I've had every few years since age started to descend upon me. Also, I have to be on the east coast on Tuesday, so I might as well go to bed early / get up early and start acclimating to the time zone, I guess.

But despite the neck spasmy end to the day, today was pretty perfect for some much-needed indulgence of my inner loner. I woke up after getting lots of sleep, then walked down Pearl to The Kitchen, which is one of my favorite restaurants in Boulder. I got there when very few people were up and around yet, so I chilled at the bar and drank coffee, journaled, and had a v. tasty breakfast (poached eggs with green shaksouka, chickpeas, and gluten free toast - not my usual thing, but the flavors were really bright and tasty, and it felt healthier than my usual slab of bacon and potatoes). Taking myself out for brunch is a thing I used to do all the time and haven't had time for the past few months, so this felt like a much-needed return to my roots.

I then wandered back up Pearl Street, stopping in at a few shops and buying some v. cute fall/winter items. Then I came home long enough to drop some stuff and start some laundry before grabbing my car to run some other errands - mostly a much-needed Target run and a quick stop at my office to scan/print some documents. Then I came home, talked to my parents, straightened up my bedroom, and put away some clothes that had been sitting in a laundry basket since before Labor Day (I'm usually not this slovenly, but the last few weeks have been rough).

I was going to work after that, but things started to slowly go downhill...my neck started to hurt, and I could hear my downstairs neighbor (well, technically, his girlfriend) having sex while I was heating up my soup, so I had to eat while listening to music to drown out the moans. I then did some retaliatory coffee grinding and kitchen cleaning before deciding that work couldn't happen due to my neck and choosing to go to bed instead of opening my work laptop.

So, if I don't feel like I can work now, sleep is the right option so that I can get up and do stuff in the morning. Goodnight!

quicksilver girl

I realized today that I have only been home two of the last seven weekends, which explains why I don't really know how to operate in my own house. I was invited to a coworker's house tonight to hang out, but I ended up canceling in favor of indulging my inner, v. neglected hermit and getting shit done. It wasn't all work - I slept for over ten hours last night, and then I got up, messed around, made coffee, and got a mani/pedi. I also took a nap and talked to Katie, so it wasn't like I didn't do anything relaxing/fun....

But staying in was rather imperative because, totally ridiculously, I had to finish last year's taxes tonight. Yes, they were due in April. I paid them then, but I had gotten an extension for actually filing - as I recall, I was in the middle of trips to Iowa for ukuleles and trips to Paris for champagne, along with the performance review cycle that was happening then (which was pretty painful, although that pain has been forgotten because of the fresh trauma of September's performance review cycle). It really only took me another 3-4 hours tonight to prep everything, but my spring/summer was so ridiculous that taxes were pretty much the last thing I wanted to do whenever I was home.

So tonight I had to pay the wages of my sins and actually do the thing I'd been putting off. Luckily, I'm basically done - I just have to go into the office tomorrow and scan some stuff to send to my CPA, since my printer at home is over ten years old and no longer connects to any of my computers since they no longer make modern drivers for it. So, while tomorrow will involve a lot of other work and errands, at least this portion is done.

And now, after confessing my sins and showing you all that it's not just your emails/texts/voicemails/postcards that I've been neglecting, it's time for bed - goodnight!

system overload

I unfortunately had meetings starting at eight this morning, and even though I only live six minutes from the office, I couldn't manage to get myself out of bed in time to drive there. So I took two hours of meetings from home, drove to work, and then had meetings until four. Happily, one of them was lunch with Caroline, and we made sand art in bottles thanks to some crafting activity that happened to be in the cafe (I feel like I work in a preschool, although now that prohibition is over, it's a preschool with beer and cider on tap). It wasn't exactly a break since we were also talking about work, and it was also hard to avoid getting sand in my salmon, but it was better than nothing.

I left after four, ran a couple of errands, came home, tidied up the downstairs, and made chicken tortilla soup. While it was cooking, I wrote for an hour - I know, I'm shocked too. I spent a couple of hours after I ate doing mostly procrastinatory stuff, but all in all it was the night I needed.

And now it's time for bed - goodnight!

so i keep it low, keep a secret code

Last night, I finally went to bed at midnight, was in bed for approximately five minutes...and then a fire alarm started chirping like it had waited for that very moment to fuck with me. So I tracked it down, got out a ladder, found a battery, and changed it - but that made for a v. non-relaxing start to my bedtime. It's no wonder that I woke up this morning wondering where I was - before I opened my eyes I couldn't remember which hotel room I was in, until I remembered that I was in my own house. Maybe that's a sign I should stop traveling.

sssanyway. Today was way more meetings than I wanted on my first day back; in fact, there were so many meetings that I wasn't able to partake in all the alcohol that is flowing through the office again after a long hiatus (it felt like a shadow of what it must have felt like when Prohibition ended - all the sudden there's fundraisers for kegerators and the restocking of personal bars, and someone I don't even know offered me whisky at four p.m.). But I was able to leave at 5:15 to go to happy hour, which turned into dinner. My old team, who is still the team of my heart, went to Rio Grande to hang out on the rooftop patio. The margaritas and food were so-so, but the patio was great and the company was excellent.

Then I came home, took a brief nap, had a call from 10-10:30pm, and worked until now. And now it's most certainly time for bed - goodnight!

goodbye to rosie, the queen of corona

I'm finally back in Boulder after two weeks away - it's not for long since I have to go to NYC next week, but it's better than nothing. I woke up fairly early this morning and did some work at Veronica's dining table while staring at the ocean, so that felt pretty special despite the fact that I was making slides. I ended up taking a meeting from her place before leaving - she was v. gracious about having me all up in her space. I really wasn't ready to say goodbye to her when I left....

...but all things come to an end, so I threw my stuff into my rental car and sped off, admiring the ocean (and the surfers) as I went. The travel situation was fairly uneventful, other than an Airtrain delay at SFO that made me wait for ten minutes in the rental car center (annoying, but I was early enough that it wasn't a problem). I had lunch at Bun Mee and admired how much better the food has gotten at SFO, and then I grabbed an iced coffee and boarded my flight. It was on time; even better, I had an empty seat next to me, so I was able to get some work done without any issues.

Eventually, I landed in Denver, retrieved my car, drove back to Boulder, and went to the grocery store so that I could have food like a normal human (or, more importantly, coffee). When I got home, I ate and took a v. brief nap, and then had meetings with people in Asia for two hours - really not at all what I wanted to do tonight, but I was refusing all meetings with Asia while I was traveling, so I was overdue.

And now I need to sleep - goodnight!

good girls don't but I do

I had a fairly ridiculous day at work - it started off by winning an award from my VP, but it quickly went downhill due to an admirable quantity and quality of interpersonal bullshit. However, I did sneak away to answer email at Philz, which is better than answering it anywhere else.

I eventually got to Veronica's around 5:30, where we hung out and had medicinal wine (doesn't fume blanc cure the common cold?). I'm staying at her place tonight because hotels in SF are over $700 tonight because of Dreamforce - and thank God I'm not staying downtown, since the newly-opened transit center is suddenly closed because they found a fissure in a load bearing beam. This is comforting because, no matter what I fuck up at work, it will never be a load bearing beam in a two billion dollar structure.

Sssanyway. I eventually left Veronica's and met up with Lauren (aka Subz) at Sorrel. I hadn't seen Lauren since June, which was way overdue. We ate some super tasty food - I really loved the risotto and the steak, but my favorite bite was the polenta stuffed with cheese and fried, then covered with proscuitto and caviar. I barely understood the menu, but it was cheaper than I expected (but still super bougie to an embarrassing degree). And it was great to see Lauren - she made me miss a lot of things about SF that I'll probably forget as soon as I see the Boulder Flatirons.

And now I must sleep since I'm leaving in the morning - goodnight!

I dream I never know anyone at the party and I'm always the host

I'm in the eighth bed that I've slept in since my 37th birthday thirteen days ago (Boulder, Iowa, Sioux City, San Fransisco, original Jen Lui, Santa Cruz, Veronica, Sunnyvale) and I'm more than ready to go home. Today started off beautifully, since the drive from Veronica's to Sunnyvale involved some gorgeous fog and ocean until I got to the main freeway. But the rest of the day was much less relaxing...

... However, I had dinner for a summit that I'm attending, and Chris and Alice were here too, so that was fun. And now I'm about to get eight hours of sleep, which is even more fun. Goodnight!

and the sky is grey

I'm in Veronica's guest room, and I need to go to bed immediately if I'm going to make it to the glorious south bay tomorrow. Today marked a lovely end to my retreat, and then Grace and I drove home and debriefed all the way as we usually do. Then I came to Veronica's and spent the past few hours hanging out, drinking rosé and eating tacos and talking about life and books (and my manuscript, which she'd read and given feedback on, which was awesome).

And now, after not doing any justice at all to the magic that is Veronica, I'm going to bed - goodnight!

i want to see you be brave

I'm so fucking relaxed. This is not a phrase I have written or felt in weeks, so I'm enjoying it while it lasts. Grace and I had another delightful breakfast, this time with a southern lady who had some delightful sayings (like prefacing insults with "I'm sure he has many fine traits and qualities"), and then we went to the morning session, which I found only moderately annoying. I then say by a stream and journaled, then sat on a patio and journaled before meeting up with Grace for lunch (how do they make everything, even chicken breast, taste so good here?).

The afternoon session was better - it involved drawing, which I surprisingly found myself enjoying. I also saw the beginnings of some crazy people manifesting themselves, which was entertaining now and would stop being entertaining if this lasted another few days.

I then got a glass of rosé, hid it in my coffee mug so I could take it away from the cafe to a more secluded spot, and journaled and talked to Grace for a couple of hours. All in I've written over twenty pages in my journal at this retreat - not quite as impressive as last year's silent retreat, but well worth doing.

After dinner, I got a massage, which was pretty much perfect. And now it's time for bed - tomorrow will come all too soon, which means packing and one last session and lunch before driving back to the city of sin. Goodnight!

it's beginning to get to me

I had an amazing day with Grace - more because of Grace than because of the workshop, but that's not a bad outcome. We made it over to the event place by 8:40ish and had a v quick, v tasty breakfast before the morning workshops. I liked the morning better than the afternoon - I think Cheryl Strayed was more pop psychology and Elizabeth Gilbert was more pop spirituality, and I think I kind of dislike pop spirituality. But the writing prompts during both the morning and the afternoon were interesting, and this has been a great event so far.

After we were done, Grace went for a guided nature walk and I had a glass of rosé and journaled and had a lovely conversation with a woman from San Antonio. Then Grace and I had dinner and debriefed on the day, and then we came back to the hotel and hung out in the lobby bar, where I had a glass of wine and did some excellent journaling.

And now I need to sleep - I cut back on the coffee today, and that + the fact that I was relaxed enough for my body to notice that I'm fucking exhausted means that I'm ready for bed. Goodnight!

it's all coming back to me now

Today was yet another crazy day - I was going to say that my brain finally reached its melting point, but it perhaps reached boiling point instead, since I felt like everything was turning to mist and disappearing into the ether. I woke up at six, after not enough sleep, and was out of my hotel and in the SF office by 7:30, where I managed to get some stuff done before starting meetings at nine. Most of my meetings were okay (although at some point my face was so annoyed-looking that someone laughed at me), and I had time for a quick lunch with Alice and Chris, so I guess it could be worse. I also had four iced coffees, which kept me awake but may have contributed to the feeling of disintegration...

...but I managed to leave around 2:30 to come to Santa Cruz with Grace. She met me at my office and we grabbed snacks before heading south, which was probably a critical mistake - by the time we actually got out of the garage, traffic was horrible, and it took like forty minutes just to get to the freeway. So, the drive to Santa Cruz took over two hours, and it's a good thing that I was the one driving (even though I felt like my brain was oozing out of my ears) since Grace doesn't know the east side of the city from the west side of the city (I shouldn't publicize that, but I want to remember it because she was shocked when we were suddenly in Daly City and I found that to be incredibly funny).

When we got here, I simply had to lie down for ten minutes because I couldn't function anymore, and that was just enough to revive me and get me out the door. We are here for a writing workshop with Elizabeth Gilbert and Cheryl Strayed, so we went to the center (which is gorgeous), checked in, had supper (mindfully, of course), and then listened to their evening talk. It was really good and really entertaining, especially since they're well-spoken and have a great connection, but it was a bit annoying (really annoying) that they made several derogatory comments about romance novels (which of course Grace and I angrily debriefed about later). Also, the crowd is exactly what you would expect - a lot of white women, 30-55, bougie enough to afford to spend several hundred dollars (on registration, not counting flights/hotel/food) listening to two other bougie white women talk about #livingyourbest life. But I'm probably going to get a book out of this experience, so no regrets.

But now I need to go to bed immediately - goodnight!

it's a bit of a posture, a bit of a stance

Today was another ridiculous day of work, with no breaks from 8-4:30. But then I left and had dinner with Aga and Andrea (my old team from what feels like a lifetime ago, but has only been a couple of months). And now I'm back in SF and I'm going to bed at ten like an old person so I can get up and pack/do work. Goodnight!

it's a lie, a kiss with open eyes

Today was one of the most painful days I've had in awhile - I really need to stop having painful days though. I woke up at 3:30am, after 4.5hrs of sleep, unable to fall asleep again because I couldn't stop thinking of all the stuff I needed to do. I'd set my alarm for six, but instead I finally succumbed to my panic and got up at 4:15 and worked in my bed like a maniac until 8:30, when I got ready and went into the SF office.

Needless to say, while the work I did in the morning was super important, it wrecked me for the day since I'm not used to expending that much mental energy and decision making for so many hours before coffee (or daylight). I had a couple of meetings in SF, and then I drove to mountain view at lunch, where I had to slog for a few more hours (including several meetings where I didn't quite feel like my normal self).

But I escaped at 4:30, drove to San Antonio shopping center, parked in what used to be the Sears parking lot and is now parking for a bunch of yuppie food stores and overpriced condos, and took a twenty minute nap. The nap completely saved my life, which made it easier to be on for my fun plans for the night...

... And that was dinner with Joann and the original Jen Lui at Jen's new house. Joann and I met in the shopping center to pick up sushi, and then we went to Jen's. The new house is gorgeous, and we ate and talked about life and then enjoyed some rose in the backyard hot tub (friends with hot tubs are a real benefit). Due to the hot tub and my extreme exhaustion, I'm spending tonight at Jen's - I'd planned ahead for this and have stuff with me, so I won't have to do the walk of shame into my early meetings tomorrow (and, more importantly, I'm twenty minutes from work instead of the 90-120 mins I would be in SF).

But now I'm hoping I can get nine hours of sleep - goodnight!

I woke up in mid-afternoon because that's when it all hurts the most

I'm in ye olde San Francisco, feeling nostalgic for my old life here, and yet simultaneously happy that I'm no longer attempting to make it in the city of sin. Today was an exercise in memory - I spent the morning in the SF office, and then I spent the afternoon cruising around the bay, visiting Angel Island with my team, where I worked while they walked around.

After the cruise (which showed the Golden Gate in all its glory), we had a drink at a tiki bar at fisherman's wharf (aka San Francisco Disney). Then we went to dinner at Louie's Gen-gen Room, which I'd enjoyed last winter with Adit, Zoochander, etc. After, Kristen bailed, but the rest of us went to Benjamin Cooper, where we had another cocktail and got into an ill advised (but still interesting) conversation about politics.

And now I need to sleep immediately so I can get some critical work done tomorrow - goodnight!

selling the drama

The day started off great - [censored] and I had brunch at the buffet at the Hard Rock, which was better than any of the other options around, and we also played slots for 30 seconds so that I could claim a free travel mug for my birthday month. Then we parted ways (alas), and I drove to Des Moines, which was long (three hours) but uneventful.

My flight to Denver was smooth, and I got some work done on it. I had time for a burger and a margarita (and more  work) at the airport before boarding my flight to SFO, which I spent alternating between napping and working. We landed only a few minutes late after a brief mechanical issue in Denver - but then we had to wait almost ninety minutes for a gate to open up. The pilot said he'd never experienced something like this in his thirty years in aviation, so I'd say he was having a bad day (as were the rest of us, but especially the guy next to me, who had been touring the irrigation systems of the great state of Nebraska and was on his way home to New Zealand and missed his flight as a result).

So, I didn't get to my hotel until after eleven, which was a real bummer since I had intended to either do more working or more sleeping than I'm going to get. I should probably work, but I'm too desperate for sleep, so that's my choice - goodnight!

if dreams are like movies, then memories are films about ghosts

I had a jam-packed day in ye olde Iowa. I woke up in time to do a bit of day job stuff (which is neverending) while sitting on the porch and playing with the kittens - three of them let me hold them today, which felt like a victory even though I'm severely allergic and should have left them alone.

Then I drove down to the round barn to check out the festivities there and say goodbye to my parents. They were hosting a garden train exhibit today, which coincided with a local celebration - the trains came mostly from some group based in Des Moines that my dad has recently joined, but there were quite a few local visitors streaming through. My dad had somehow conned Aunt B into coming down and helping to sell tshirts, so I gave her some business (but not enough to get a free jar of honey from her bees...but since I'm traveling carry-on only and she'd already given me honey in Colorado, it's okay). I also saw Uncle Mark v. briefly, since he showed up as I was about to leave. The trains were pretty cool and the barn was a good location for it, and I got to see how to learn morse code (reader: .. / -.. .. -.. -. .----. - / .-.. . .- .-. -.).

But I couldn't stick around - I had plans with [censored] that required me driving over four hours, so I had to say my fond farewells to southern Iowa and drive to northwest Iowa instead. The drive was uneventful; Iowa is perhaps at its best in September, so it was quite pretty the whole way. That is, until I got to Sioux City, which was my destination - the hotel is perhaps the worst Holiday Inn I've ever seen, and [censored] and I somehow got yet another room with an air conditioner that is broken in some unique way (not as bad as the one in the room we somehow always get in Texas, but not great).

However, we're not here for the hotel - we are here because we saw Counting Crows, with Live as the opener, at the Sioux City Hard Rock Casino. How Sioux City has a Hard Rock, I don't know. We got here in time to have a quick dinner at Perkins (v. midwestern), and then we went to the concert venue. When we got there, we discovered that our 'VIP' seats were folding chairs on a dais bearing the brunt of the sun, so we got a drink and stood in the shade. And by 'we got a drink', I mean I bought a strawber-irta, showed it to [censored], [censored] said, 'doesn't that have gluten in it?', and so [censored] drank a strawber-ita while I went back and got a vodka cranberry.

Eventually, though, the sun subsided while we watched Boom Forest (yeah, I don't know), and so we took our seats in time for Live to start. They were really good, at least for the songs I recognized - I love all the songs of theirs that I know, and we were glad they played 'Selling the Drama' in addition to the other three or four songs that everyone knows. During their set, an increasingly drunk woman was cheering for them with increasing frequency, to the point that it almost seemed to be what she did whenever she exhaled. Luckily for us, she reached almost-passing-out stage and then was hustled out by security at the beginning of Counting Crows' set (during 'Angels of the Silences', which seems appropriate). So, needless to say, the people watching was fun.

Counting Crows played for almost two hours, and they were wonderful - they hit a lot of my favorite songs, including 'Mrs. Potter's Lullaby', 'Omaha', 'Round Here', 'Angels of the Silences', 'Colorblind', 'God of Ocean Tides', 'Palisades Park', and 'A Long December' (and a few others that I either forgot or didn't particularly care about). I felt a bit melancholy during some of the set - many of these songs are inextricably linked to moods or memories from high school or college or my early twenties. I also saw Counting Crows in 2002, I think, which feels like a lifetime or two ago. But the melancholy was worth it, and I totally loved the set, so I'm glad we came.

Of course, this was the most inconvenient concert to get to, since it required a flight and a four hour drive (and a three hour drive to the airport tomorrow), and [censored] had to drive a couple of hours, and we're staying in a mildly terrible hotel. But we agreed it's not the dumbest thing we've ever done - dumbest thing ever is tied between when we took a five-hour detour via Casper due to I-80 being closed for snow in Wyoming and the time I drove from Chicago to Walcott after my flight was canceled for weather and then we drove home together in a crazy blinding fog to make it in time for Christmas. And neither of those resulted in seeing Counting Crows, so this is clearly a winner.

But now I need to sleep - I have to get up in time to shower, pack, have breakfast, say farewell to [censored], and get to the airport so I can go to California. Goodnight!

tonight I'm gonna bury that horse in the ground

I'm still overwhelmed by work, and I should probably work all night...but that sounds like a terrible plan, so I'm going to bed instead. But today wasn't all bad - I spent most of it working outside, and any meeting is better when you're out in the sun and looking out over my parents' rolling hills. I also enjoyed being regularly attacked by kittens - and I really enjoyed petting one of them like I was Doctor Evil while sitting on conference calls.

I was done with meetings around 5:30, and then I went down to the round barn to check out some train stuff that they're doing for a show tomorrow. I also admired all the new info signs and historical stuff my parents had put up - apparently getting a laminator was dangerous for them, since they now spend a lot of time printing and laminating old photos of the area. It all looked great, though, and I got to eat a perfect apple off one of the trees there, so that was a nice break.

Then we came home briefly, and then we went to Seymour for supper for the second night in a row since my mom was too exhausted to cook. The salad bar had chocolate pudding on it, which is v Midwestern - and very different from the spicy fried chickpeas from Nopalito that I ate this afternoon as a snack. Neither is better, but sometimes the difference between the places I call home are intense....

Then we came home and hung out in the kitchen for a bit, but we were all so tired that we couldn't stay up and talk. They have stuff to do at the barn all day, and I'm leaving in the morning to rendezvous with [censored] on the other side of the state, so this marks an unusually quick end to this trip. There will be more time later this year, although it's unlikely that I'll get to work on the patio at Christmas. Goodnight!

i would come back a thousand times

I'm totally wrecked - I got up at eight, showered, made some eggs, started working around 9:30...and basically didn't stop. I had meetings almost straight through until six, then escaped for dinner with my parents. But around 9:30 I started working again, and I worked for four hours, with a quick 'break' to call a couple of people in India/Japan around eleven.

Needless to say, I'm wiped out - and I have to do it all again tomorrow, since my to-do list is insane and it all has hard deadlines, none of which I'm meeting. So wish me luck with that - I'm going to set my alarm to get up early, but I don't know if that's possible given that I hate getting up. We shall see, we shall see. Goodnight!

if my honey comes back, sometime

Happy birthday to me! If it hadn't been my birthday, today would have totally sucked - I'm now up against several immovable deadlines on competing, equally important priorities, and it seemed like every meeting I had today added a new tale of woe that I somehow have to solve.

However, today *is* my birthday, and so the delightful nature of all sorts of human contact made up for the tales of woe. When I walked into the office, I discovered that my old team had decorated my desk and written a card for me (which was a pretty hilarious card, all in all), and my new boss had gotten pastries for me (not knowing that I'm gluten free, but c'est la vie). Of course, I strolled in at ten a.m. - I'd been working from home starting at eight, and I had a meeting at 9:30 that I went straight to rather than going to my desk - but when everyone rather loudly sang happy birthday to me as I walked in, it felt rather decadent that I was showing up at ten.

sssanyway. I continued to get birthday texts and emails throughout the day, most of which I didn't have time to respond to due to the fact that I had meetings straight from 10:30ish to 5ish without even a break for lunch (lunch happened during a long meeting, so I had to stay with the people I was meeting with). I also got a cookie delivery from Natasha and Chris, which was delish. Then I drove my car home and talked to my mom on the way, and then I strolled over to River and Woods to have dinner with my new boss and four of the other managers in Boulder. I normally would not want to celebrate my birthday with a work dinner, but I do like River and Woods, and the poutine and rosé (and churros at the end for my birthday) made it almost feel like I was having non-work-related fun.

Then I came home and packed and straightened up my house, since I'm taking off again tomorrow. And now I really need to sleep - I have a ton of work to do in the morning and precious little time to do it, and also I probably wrecked my body by having more sugar and gluten in the day than I usually have in a week. Oops. But it was a #treatyoself kind of day, so #noregrets. Goodnight!

serial thrilla

Did I tell you that I bought an Audi? Yes? Well, I now have an even newer Audi. Surprise!

The thing I didn't say on the blog over the last month was that there were some irregularities (at least, in my mind) with the Audi that I bought a month ago vs. what the dealership had contractually agreed to. So, while I loved the car, I eventually lost my patience with them and sent a strongly worded email at five a.m. on Friday to the general manager of the Audi dealership, threatening to file a false advertising / false mileage / contractual failure complaint with the state + leaving negative reviews everywhere I could. The end result of this was that they swapped my original Audi for an even newer Audi - same trim, same features, same money, but none of the issues with the original.

Of course, that took time that I didn't really have to spare today - but I was in and out in about an hour, after signing all the paperwork and giving back my original and testing out the new one. They're functionally identical, and the dealership was profusely apologetic about my previous experience - so I forgive them and would recommend them in the future. And that's a good thing, since I adore my car and can see myself buying Audis in the future (provided that I continue to live a life of corporate whoredom, of course, in which case I will make myself feel better about the golden handcuffs by eventually upgrading to a sporty two-door coupe when my midlife crisis fully hits).

sssanyway. The rest of my day was uneventful - I got up in time for a 7:30am conference call (I do not recommend this), and then slogged until five, when I went to the dealership. I should have worked tonight, but instead I went to Pizzeria Locale and had two glasses of wine and some pizza and did some journaling in anticipation of my birthday (I like journaling on my birthday and reflecting upon my year, #sorrynotsorry). And now I should still be working, but I'm going to go to bed and hope that sleep will make me more productive in the morning - goodnight!

how to save a life

I'm so glad that I came back to Colorado and had a day at home, even if I was minimally productive and really wanted to do nothing at all. The day started off perfectly - I slept well, lazed in bed for awhile, and then dragged myself out of bed so that I could have brunch with Katie. She drove up from Denver, so we went to the other side of Pearl Street and hung out at Arcana. It's a v. v. hipstery place, with an incredible interior - I'd been there once before with Navin, and so I was looking forward to brunch. It was pretty good, all in all, although my huevos rancheros had a sauce on it that was a little too hollandaise-y for my liking (I love hollandaise, just not on huevos rancheros).

But the coffee was tasty and the company was perfect, and our booth was just right for catching up about what it means to be in your late thirties and how we both feel old (Katie's birthday is a month before mine, so we are pretty much in lockstep on our emotions related to getting older). After we ate, we walked around Pearl Street for awhile - we especially enjoyed browsing in Peppercorn, which is my favorite kitchen goods store, and we especially disliked seeing an adult human dressed as a dog prancing around on the sidewalk (I get that there are a lot of street performers in Boulder, but this costume looked like it was verging dangerously toward furry/fetish, which made me unhappy to watch the little kids throwing money at it). People are strange.

sssanyway. Katie went home after that, and I spent a couple of hours procrastinating and doing absolutely nothing, which wore me out enough that I needed a nap. But I eventually rallied - I walked to the grocery store to get a couple of things to get me through the next few days, and then I moved my old car and washed it so it didn't look quite so abandoned. I then spent an hour on the phone with my parents - I'll see them in a few days, but we had a lot to catch up on since I unusually didn't talk to them last weekend.

I then did my post-travel laundry and made some huevos rancheros for dinner (more satisfying than the brunch ones, since I used salsa verde instead of hollandaise - but my huevos rancheros were pretty tasty, since I bought nice tortillas and some delicious black beans at the grocery store). And I just took care of some personal emails. I should have worked on day job stuff tonight, but I wasn't feeling it - so I'm going to try to go to bed now so I can do that stuff in the morning. Goodnight!

life is a highway

I'm back in my own bed in Boulder after a very lovely day in the city of sin. I got just enough sleep, then showered, packed, and left Roam exactly at my eleven a.m. departure time. I then met Katrina at Nopalito - it's one of my favorite restaurants in SF, and it's an especially good choice for brunch (especially gluten free brunch).

So Katrina and I hung out there for a couple of hours, splitting lots of food and having a margarita each while catching up on life. We also walked around for a bit after, and Katrina bought me a gluten free cookie for the road before we parted ways.

I then grabbed a final Philz and drove to the airport. I was super early, so I planned to have some food and journal and enjoy the bustle of the international terminal, since my flight to Denver was for some reason departing from international. But as I was sipping my wine, I looked over at the bar, made eye contact with someone...and realized it was Chris Sallen, an old friend from work whom I knew a lifetime ago.

So we ended up talking for almost an hour - he was headed to Copenhagen for work, but his flight was delayed, and so it was pure serendipity that we ran into each other in a place neither of us should have been. It was really great to catch up, even if running into someone from fifteen years ago makes me feel super old (I've seen him more recently than that, but still).

Eventually though we both had to go, so we said our farewells and I made it to my gate just in time to board. I'd gotten upgraded, so the nap I enjoyed most of the way was slightly more comfortable than usual.

And now I'm home, and ready to enjoy my own bed for four whole nights before taking off again. Goodnight!

heat of the moment

I had a gorgeous day - or at least a gorgeous evening, once I got through a whole lot of slogging. But the slogging included a lunch with Aga, Chris and Alice - Aga left the team a few months ago, and when she told her new team that she had to go to a different building to have lunch with 'tiki boss', this apparently confused them. Who knew that tiki boss as a brand isn't really something that people in corporate America are accustomed to?

But I left the office around 4:40 and went to the dirty dirty east bay to hang out with my college friends. I never go to the east bay willingly, but the people I wanted to see are mostly there, so I put in the massive sacrifice and made it happen. We had a dinner reservation at 7:30, but almost all of us met up at East Bay Spice Company for drinks first. So I hung out with Jess and Chandlord (hereafter called 'Zoochander' because Oniel made it happen), and then John showed up, and Claude and Sam came too. The cocktails there were v. delightful - especially one that had carrot juice in it and so looked healthy, but also had mezcal and two other liquors and so was completely, definitively not healthy.

After two drinks and my discussions of Johnny Depp and Steven Seagal, we went to Saha - a tasty restaurant that also happened to be the only place where I could get a reservation for seven people with only 24 hours' notice. Oniel was the only person who couldn't make it to drinks, but he met us at the restaurant - I hadn't seen him in many many months, so it was super exciting that he was able to come out. So the seven of us all did the three-course menu, and we split two bottles of wine, and we shared the chocolate mousse that they brought me for a birthday dessert + some Syrian cheese thing that made for an incredible dessert. I also practiced 'man hugs' with Oniel, although that meant I mostly tricked him into hugging me for real. We also all laughed about many things, especially the guy who had a Volvo parked outside, which led him to confront us about it since the restaurant window was open and he apparently knew we were talking about him. Oops.

Then we all adjourned to John and Jess's house, where I had some port while discussing the Human Centipede and a bearded Ellen DeGeneres - as one does. And then Zoochander and I rode back to the city together in a lyft that made me mildly carsick, but I shall survive. Happy early birthday to me - goodnight!

feeling like a saber toothed tiger

I woke up at 3:45am feeling the effects of last night's wine, and realizing I had no access to my beloved ibuprofen. So, needless to say, today was a bit of an exercise in pain, although I didn't feel too awful (and I also deserved it).

But after slogging all day, I headed north - I grabbed a coffee at Philz in my old Palo Alto neighborhood, and then went to San Mateo for dinner with my writer friends. Veronica, Anne, Barbara, and I met at Three, which was tasty - but more importantly, it was great for my spirits to see them.

I would say more about how wonderful they are, but I need to sleep immediately if I want to make it through all my plans tomorrow. Goodnight!

started at the bottom now we here

I had a bottle of wine tonight, so I'm spending the night in Shedletsky's guest room. Today was uneventful at work, albeit so busy that I'm never going to catch up. But I slipped out at 5:45 and came to John and Tina's, where I hung out with zee baby, ate a bunch of steak, and drank my share of three bottles of wine.

So rather than driving to the city, I'm spending tonight in their guest room - which eliminates 45mins from my commute tomorrow, so that's a good thing. But now I should sleep - goodnight!

give me a home where the buffalo roam

I'm back to two old familiar haunts at once: I'm in San Francisco, and I'm staying at Roam. They finally opened their SF location on Alamo Square a couple of months ago, so I'm checking it out even though it's probably super inconvenient for my mostly South Bay activities. But I'm only here until Saturday, so most socializing will have to wait until my next trip :(

But today went as smoothly as it could have gone. I got up in time to shower and pack, and then [censored], [censored]'s coworker, and I went to the spy museum. It was pretty gimmicky in places, although [censored] and I both were able to memorize and retain our top secret spy covers throughout the morning, so I think that means we could've been super spies (unless asked to complete any mission on the edge of a cliff or roof or any other heights, in which case we would've failed immediately).

Still, I like spies and spy stories so I was happy to go. Then we had a quick lunch at shake shack, and then we went back to the hotel, where I changed and then said my farewells.

The rest of the day was travel - I had to connect in Denver, so I said hi to my new city briefly before flying to my old one. And now I really need to sleep since I have to get up and drive to mountain view in the morning - I'm sure any nostalgia I felt when driving into the city and seeing the Bay Bridge wreathed in fog will be cured when I have to do my old commute tomorrow. Goodnight!

free at last

[censored] and I had another great day in Washington, D.C., thanks for asking! We got up in time to have breakfast, and then we took a lyft to the WWII memorial with the plan of getting there before the heat was too murderous to survive. I wouldn't say we were entirely successful since it was already hot as balls at ten a.m., but it's easier to put the mild discomfort into context when you're looking at a memorial to 400000+ people who died. Both our grandfathers fought in the Pacific in WWII, so this is always a moving thing...and yet that war is also slipping nearly completely from memory, which is its own bittersweet monument.

So, we spent a bit of time there, and then we walked to the National Museum of African American History, which opened nearby a couple of years ago. It's been so popular this whole time that you had to get tickets in advance even though the tickets were free, but this month they're testing walk-up ticketing. So, we walked up and were inside within ten minutes. Of course, it was still crowded inside - especially downstairs where the museum technically starts - so we went up to the top floor instead. It was full of the achievements of African Americans in the arts - music, dance, acting, etc., so that was fun. We also swung through the floor below that, with an emphasis on military service, community activism, education, and sports (so I had to see a bit about the Olympics, including a statue of the Olympians in '68 who threw a Black Panther sign in protest during their medal ceremony - Kaepernick is not the first and won't be the last as long as inequality is so rampant).

Then we went to the basement, where we discovered some of the earlier crowds had died down. The museum actually starts even deeper than that - you take an elevator with twenty or thirty other people into a subterranean space, where the experience of the Middle Passage and the slave trade is documented. It's all horrifying - child-sized manacles, stats about the life expectancy of enslaved people on sugar plantations being seven years - presented in a dark, claustophobia-inducing maze.

But the museum slowly meanders up a couple of levels, opening up and unveiling new pieces along the way. A lot of it is still grim - the part that [censored] and I both thought was among the most moving/troubling was the endless list of descriptions of enslaved men, women, children, and babies for sale on auction blocks across the US. And it's even more grim because that history continues today - it's not a surprise that the thread of racism and violence that could cause slavery, and lynchings, and stripping people of basic rights even after slavery was abolished, is still a thread that is woven into the fabric of our society today. It's no mistake, for example, that as soon as the federal government finally ended many of the oversights/protections of the Voting Rights Act, we're seeing attempts to disenfranchise blacks across the South by closing polling places, making it harder to get ID, etc. Until we truly address the horrors of the past, we're doomed to repeat it.

So - yeah, the museum was great. After we left, we had lunch at a food truck nearby, and almost melted in the heat. Then we came back to the hotel and I took a v. restorative shower and a v. v. restorative nap. I did a bit of emailing, then had a drink with [censored] and [censored]'s coworkers. We didn't linger long, though - [censored] and Kimberly (a coworker) and I had an early dinner nearby (City Tap House - tasty!) before going to a Moonlight and Monuments tour.

I didn't see much moonlight, but I saw a lot of monuments - but I can't tell you about them now because I'm falling asleep typing this, no doubt due to the extra drink and snack we had when we got back to the hotel. So now it's time for sleep - goodnight!

you got a fast car

If San Francisco is the city of sin in my mind, what does that make Washington D.C.?

I don't have an answer for you yet. But today was pretty delightful. [censored] and I fulfilled our desires to sleep in, but we still managed to make it to the club lounge for breakfast before breakfast closed (this was not a particularly heroic feat, since breakfast ended at ten). Then we indulged our inner nerds and went to the Postal Museum - it's part of the general Smithsonian collection, but is perhaps the least-trafficked of the Smithsonians due to the fact that it's about fucking stamps and not about the Apollo Program.

But those of you who prefer the Apollo Program to stamps are #basic and really missing out. The Postal Museum was great - I learned a lot about all the complete idiots who formed the first air mail (one guy threw a rock at a bull who had charged him when he landed his plane to smoke a cigarette, but accidentally hit the farmer, so couldn't take breaks there anymore). In fact, the history of the postal service had a lot of daredevil idiots - people wandering through the woods making their own trails from NYC to Boston in the 1600s; the Pony Express; the air mail guys; the people still running a mule train down into the Grand Canyon every day to provide mail service to the Havasupai (okay, they probably aren't idiots, but if you've tried to haul a mail order washing machine into the Grand Canyon via mule, you may occasionally question your life decisions).

After that museum, which was excellent, we walked outside and were promptly greeted by the blast furnace that is DC in summer. So we didn't stray to far for a late lunch - we went across the street to The Dubliner, which had better food than I was expecting and the critical benefit of not requiring us to be in the sun for more than five minutes. After our meal, we spent two minutes paying respects at the Ukrainian famine/genocide memorial across the street, and then we took a lyft to the Air and Space Museum....

...which was about a hundred times more popular than the Postal Service museum, which was real annoying since I hate people and I especially hate children. However, the WWI and WWII exhibits were great - especially since I don't know much about the air war in WWI, so I enjoyed / was sobered my all of that. We also watched some videos of Medal of Honor winners from WWII who were telling their stories on video...you know you had to survive some really nasty shit to get a Medal of Honor in WWII, so that was pretty powerful.

There was more to the Air and Space Museum than that, but if you want to know the rest, you should just visit since the museum is free and my time is more valuable than that.

sssanyway. After the museum, we meandered back toward Chinatown and had dinner at Matchbox, which is a pizza place that I went to after Adit's wedding like eight years ago. The pizza (even the gluten free pizza) was super tasty, as was the rosé, and so I felt pretty satisfied with life. When we got back to the hotel, we adjourned to the club lounge, where we ran into some of [censored]'s coworkers - [censored] is in town for a conference, so the chances that we'll see coworkers will continue to go up in the next day or two. So we said hi to them, grabbed a drink, said bye to them, and ended up taking our drinks to a pair of chairs overlooking the atrium, where the lights slowly cycled through the colors of the rainbow and might have driven us mad if we'd been trying to read.

But we were just trying to drink Bud Light ([censored]) and sauvignon blanc (me) - we're such cliches - so the lights were fine. And now I must sleep so we can do fun stuff tomorrow - goodnight!

this place about to blow

Apologies for not blogging last night - I had a long day (woke up at six, did a bunch of stuff around the house including two loads of laundry before I went to work, and slogged hard and fast until 4:30), and then I got a mani/pedi and took some stuff back to Anthro and bought some stuff at Sephora, and then had a leisurely dinner/margarita at Verde to unwind. This meant I had to wind back up when I got home, since I had to pack for DC/SF and attempt to get some sleep before today's voyage...

But today went super smoothly, and now I'm in Washington, D.C. with [censored], who is here for [censored]. I'm here for a couple of days of vacation, which I think will be super fun - I have to go to California for a quick work trip on Tuesday, but until then I'm going to enjoy the sights, savor the food, and probably antagonize [censored], since that's my primary role in [censored]'s life. I made it to the airport today in time to have breakfast, and then I was planning to work all the way to DC - but the wifi on the plane wasn't working, which really bummed me out. I was able to answer a bunch of email in offline mode, but I wasn't able to do anything of real importance without internet, so I'll probably need to do a bit of stuff tomorrow or Monday in preparation for the week.

But that can all wait. When I got to the hotel, [censored] was already here, and so we wallowed in the luxury that my hotel status got us (namely, access to the club lounge, where we enjoyed complimentary soda and a nice view while catching up). Then we ventured out for dinner at Farmers and Distillers - it's got some weird ties to the North Dakota ag industry, and also had a distillery that makes most of their own liquors. My cocktails were both great; the dumpling appetizer (which came at the same time as our mains due to slightly incompetent service) was super tasty; my steak was satisfactory (but [censored]'s chicken fried steak with a donut looked amazing); and we ended with an out of this world cheesecake, so all in all it was a success.

But we're both totally exhausted because we were both working nonstop for the last week (or last three months), so we came back early and are going to bed relatively early (it's only 8:40pm in Colorado and 9:40pm in Iowa) so that we can hopefully recover enough to do some sightseeing tomorrow. Goodnight!