There's no point in burying the lede: Gram passed away Sunday night. My dad called me early Monday morning, and was lucky that he got through to me - I usually turn my ringer off, but I was half-waiting for this call, so I had left my ringer on overnight. It was time for her journey to end, since her dementia was a slow-moving horror show - but it's still sad, and I'm still not quite ready to put how I feel into words.
So. Yesterday was a bit of a haze, since I went to work and pretended to care while finding myself distracted and thinking other thoughts. Today was slightly better, or I pretended to care slightly more - it helped that I was wearing a fun new sweater/coat that I bought at Anthro last night while pursuing my usual strategy of throwing money at problems (in this case, the problems = my emotions). Also, one major benefit of working at my company is that I sometimes, completely unexpectedly, run into old friends - in this case, I looked up from my rushed 13-min lunch to see Jenni, whom I've known since the very beginning. We overlapped in India, and we went to South Africa together a lifetime ago, and she's one of my favorites even though I haven't seen her much the last couple of years.
So while I was supposed to spend tonight working, cleaning, and packing - and while Jenni was supposed to spend tonight at a work dinner - we instead played hooky on all responsibilities and met at a wine bar down on Larimer. We were only going to meet for an hour, but instead we stayed for over two, drinking wine and eating cheese and talking about current lives and past lives. It was really great to see her, and probably good to get out of my head for a bit (even if that means I have not packed, have not worked, and am only marginally ready to go tomorrow).
So I guess today could have been worse, and seeing Jenni made it a whole lot better. But now I really need to sleep - my alarm is set for six so that I can take care of a million things before heading to the airport. Goodnight!
So. Yesterday was a bit of a haze, since I went to work and pretended to care while finding myself distracted and thinking other thoughts. Today was slightly better, or I pretended to care slightly more - it helped that I was wearing a fun new sweater/coat that I bought at Anthro last night while pursuing my usual strategy of throwing money at problems (in this case, the problems = my emotions). Also, one major benefit of working at my company is that I sometimes, completely unexpectedly, run into old friends - in this case, I looked up from my rushed 13-min lunch to see Jenni, whom I've known since the very beginning. We overlapped in India, and we went to South Africa together a lifetime ago, and she's one of my favorites even though I haven't seen her much the last couple of years.
So while I was supposed to spend tonight working, cleaning, and packing - and while Jenni was supposed to spend tonight at a work dinner - we instead played hooky on all responsibilities and met at a wine bar down on Larimer. We were only going to meet for an hour, but instead we stayed for over two, drinking wine and eating cheese and talking about current lives and past lives. It was really great to see her, and probably good to get out of my head for a bit (even if that means I have not packed, have not worked, and am only marginally ready to go tomorrow).
So I guess today could have been worse, and seeing Jenni made it a whole lot better. But now I really need to sleep - my alarm is set for six so that I can take care of a million things before heading to the airport. Goodnight!
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